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Related but no related - my dad has also passed away and I was wondering if it would be too weird to have my mom and sisters and I dance to "we are family" or too much of a spectacle.
I think if I had a brother and could make your choice I would go for it and it would definitely not me too weird (in comparison to my potential weirdness). I think you should try to pick something that fits your personalities and it will seem normal - (country, wacky, whatever) Just stay away from any love songs and you should be fine.
My mom is walking me down the aisle since my dad gave me away a long time ago...
However, over the past few years I have gotten to know my dad better again and I have decided to do a father/daughter dance at the same time my FI dances with his mom.
I choose a song called, "My Wish" by Rascal Flatts...it's basically about wanting good in someone's life..."my wish" is that your struggles are small and you are happy...stuff like that....
So maybe a song like that since it's not so father/daughter oriented!
Weddings are hard when it comes to all the father-daughter stuff. I completely am feeling your pain.
My sister had our brother walk her down the aisle and they danced to "what a wonderful world"- a song we played at my father's funeral. It was beautiful and everyone cried- and my brother was cracking jokes to keep my sister from bawling (complete with ugly cry face)... we got GREAT pictures of it too.
I am having my mother walk me down the aisle and we are having a mother daughter dance while FH is dancing with his ma! LOL! We're a little unconventional, but that's what I want, b/c I'm close to my mom and that's just our relationship.
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If you don't mind being really untraditional, why don't you walk down the aisle with the groom?
I was at a wedding, where both parents were alive, but the couple didn't like the idea of "giving away of the bride"....they are a modern, professional couple. They didn't have a bridal party either. So both sets of parents walked down the aisle, and then the bride and groom.
They did have a father/daughter, son/mother dance. But, in the end, it is your wedding and you should do what you want. 
I think it would be sweet if you danced with your brother! Definitely would not be weird at all!
Just an idea, but I saw a spread in a magazine where the bride had two tiny picture frame/charm like things with photos in them attached to the ribbon around her boquet, it looked really classy and is another way you can incorporate them into the ceremony.
It's different for everyone--there is no right answer here. My dad died and it was important to me to walk down the aisle alone. In the program I wrote that I was accompanied by his memory. As for the dance, we skipped it and had an anniversary dance for both sets of my grandparents that were celebrating their 60th and 55th anniversaries during the month we got married.
I think people are touched when you do something that feels good to you and helps you honor the ones you love and the ones you lost. There is nothing tacky about that. Personally, if I was at your wedding and you danced with your brother or gaudior danced with her mom and sisters I'd be tearing up or beaming at how wonderful it was. Just be true to you and everyone else will be on board.
Good luck!
Oh, and I pinned a photo of my dad and me when I was little in my dress and it was my something old.
Lots of really good ideas I wish I would have had when I was planning my wedding! I really struggled with how to incorporated my father and his mother in our ceremony. (Both of whom had passed away recently)
My brother walked me down the aisle - which was perfect for me :)
We had two orchids the symbolized our parents behind us and had the preacher read this at the beginning of the ceremony. (we didn't have programs to print it in)
Though we are separated physically,
Faith and love have bound us eternally.
Though we cannot see you,
We know you are here.
Though we cannot touch you,
We feel the warmth of your smile, as we begin a new chapter in our lives
We skipped both the Father/Daughter and Mother/Son dances. The day was so emotional as it was - I just needed these to not even be a thought. (We didn't have much dancing in general)
Hubby and I did dance to two first dance songs. Tim & Faith's It's Your Love and Heartland's I Loved Her First. Of course it made me cry - but that song is just so powerful for me, I knew I had to include it, and it was my way of including my dad :)
Whatever choices you make will be very special!
I love the idea of you having your first dance with your brother- it is making me teary all ready- He is your closest family and you should definitely honor that- I think your parents would have wanted it that way- I'm so sorry for your loss- I'm sure your parens would be sooo proud of you!
I lost my father nearly eleven years ago. Since I do not have a brother, I decided to walk myself down the aisle. DH met me toward the end and escorted me the rest of the way. In my heart, I knew that my father was by my side. As for the father/daughter dance, I asked my father-in-law if he would dance with me. He was touched when I asked him and agreed. We danced to What a Wonderful World. It was a special and fun moment for me. Thankfully, I have been blessed with amazing in-laws. I think you should do what will make you happy. Remember, it is your day...make it beautiful!
My dad is deceased as well. My brother is walking me down the aisle and he is going to dance with me for the father/daughter dance. We are dancing to Josh Grobin's "to where you are".
My father is deceased as well and I am not sure what to do. My plan was to skip the father/daughter dance completely and have my mom walk me down the aisle.
I technically have a "godfather", who was my dad's closest cousin but I am not close to all (he lives all the way across the country). My dad's family expects him to walk me down the aisle and do the father/daughter dance. I feel awkward with this, it wouldn't mean that much to me and I don't want anyone to try and take my dad's spot. How do I politely refuse?
Is there another way I could incorporate him that would still be an honor, but not trying to substitute for my dad?
My father is also deceased. My sister will be walking me down the aisle, and instead of a father-daughter dance, I'm thinking about doing a "family dance" - my sister & brother-in-law, niece & her husband, and nephew will join me for a special dance.
My father is deceased, and I think my mom and I are just skipping the whole thing. But, that's what we're comfortable with. It's your dad and your family and you can remember him and celebrate anyway you want!
I think the idea of dancing with your brother would be really sweet, especially if you're really close. How about the song "You've Got a Friend" by James Taylor? It's really sweet, and not romantically lovey at all. :)
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My father is alive but out of the picture. I'm going to have my mom walk me down the aisle when the time comes.
As far as the dance - I think dancing with your brother is a great idea! If I had one brother instead of two, I'd totally do the same. As a previous poster said, stay away from anything too romantic. But I think it's a wonderful idea and it will be a touching moment for your guests.
@coralray - my father also passed away and I know that if i explained to my grandparents et al that I didn't want to be walked down the aisle by anyone (including godfather) they would understand. Just tell your family that you feel like that is a special father daughter moment and it would hurt you too much to try to replace him at that moment. Even if you were super close to your Godfather you possibly wouldn't want him to walk you down the aisle. I know that's how I feel. My sister had my brothers walk her down the aisle. and as sweet as that was it seem weird to me. I will walk down the aisle by myself and I feel like in a way that will honor my father.. like a moment in silence of sorts..
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@rnc620-- Thanks for the advice! It is nice to know that I am not alone in wanting to leave those spots empty, rather than finding a replacement. That is a beautiful way to phrase it too, a kind of "a moment of silence".
So I'm in the same situation but a little more complicated. My "dad" - wasn't my real dad but more of a dad to me and raised me from the age 8 until he died when I was 17 in front of me from a heart attack in which I've blamed myself for everyday. My real father is alive but we've never been close - we talk and write letters but nothing more than that. My step-brother who is a marine and I were very close but have grown apart as he lives in California and we've lost the closeness. I would like nothing more than for him to walk me down the aisle in his dress blues but I don't even know how to ask. My mother as since then been married two times and the current husband is nice but I don't want him to walk me down the aisle either. At this point I figure I'll just walk myself to save the weirdness of asking my brother and having my real father there but not walking me down the aisle. Any ideas?
My brother is also walking me down the aisle! Every time I think of it I get choked up.
I posted a similar question on Weddingbee and the wonderful ladies who responded helped me come up with some great songs to dance to. My brother and I picked "Sister" by Dave Matthews Band.
Definitely go with your heart. If he's ok dancing with you and you are ok dancing with him, then I say GO FOR IT!
Good luck and congrats.
I know this post is old but I sort of needed to vent.
My Dad is very very sick. Since the time that we got engaged till now he has been in the hospital over 5 times for extended stays and they really thought h was going to die more than once. He just went into the hospital again last night, they are doing open heart surgery today and really aren't sure what the out come will be.
I have been struggling with him walking me down the issle for a while and the father daughter dance. I know that he isn't in good enough shape to walk me down the REALLY long issle that we will have, but he would be heart broken not to. I don't know if he will be able to dance at all, and now I don't even know if he will be around to even see the day.
I have been dealing with his illnesses since I was 5 and have had plenty of time to be ready for his passing, but it doesn't make it easier.
Anyway, I just needed to share and if anyone has ideas on how to make this easier for our wedding I would love to hear them.
I went to a wedding recently where the bride's father was deceased. She danced with her two brothers (one started, then the other cut in) at one point during the ceremony. It wasn't when the traditional father/daughter dance would have been (though I think it would have been very nice, had it been there). The DJ announced that the bride was going to dance with her brothers in honor of their father, and then the eldest brother took the microphone and told her that their dad would have been so, so, so proud of his little girl, and that he would have been thrilled for her new husband to have joined the family. It was very touching, and I think it was a great thing to do in his memory.
My father passed away five years ago, and I am having my stepfather walk me down the aisle. My stepfather has been in my life since I was in grade school, and honestly, was my stong father figure growing up. However, I am choosing not to do the father-daughter dance. I don't want to do the dance because I feel like it will put a damper on things...I dont want to be thinking about the fact that my biological dad isnt there to dance with me.
My mother is deceased and my father is in prison. I have hated the idea of a wedding for so long because I don't have anyone to walk me down the isle or no one to answer we do when the preacher asks "who gives this woman."
Something has been laid upon my heart recently as I am helping my best friend plan her wedding. My mother's first cousin, whom my mother asked when I was a young child to please watch over me when she was gone (she felt she would die an early age as her mother died early too - side note - ironic that they both died at 48, my mother's mother died in my mothers arms in the kitchen and my mother died in my arms in my front yard). This first cousin of hers (female) has always been a huge part of my Christian life - she is the woman who lead me to Christ, prayed with me when I accepted Him, and has been one of my biggest cheerleaders besides my mother. Even for my senior page in the yearbook - she and my mother shared a page and both wrote something from their hearts.
How weird would it be for her to walk me down the isle and take me to light a candle on a table with my mother's picture on it before I stand in front of my groom-to-be? Also, if anyone else has any other suggestions of a meaningful way to incorporate remembering my mother and also using my second cousin (she is in her 60s) as a major part of my wedding.
Thanks to everyone who takes time to comment. I enjoyed reading other posts about people who were in similar situations with deceased parents. My heart goes out to you as I know you pain. I have been in several weddings and the hardest part is for me to see girls with their mothers on their wedding days... Knowing I will never get that chance. My mother was my one of my best friends and also a best friend to my best friend - jist is - she was awesome!
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Both of my parents are deceased, so my younger brother (whom I am very close to) will be walking me down the aisle. No problem here. I am even planning on either us placing white roses on "what would be" their chairs or having them placed before the ceremony.
My question is since my dad is deceased, do I have to skip the Father/Daughter Dance completely or could I find an appropriate dance and dance with my brother? Would that be too tacky? too weird? If it's not too tacky or too weird, does anyone have any suggestions of songs that I could dance with my brother to?
Thanks in advance, ladies!