(Closed) No father or mother to walk down isle & dance with

posted 6 years ago in 30 Something
Post # 3
Member
2459 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Firstly, I am so sorry for your loss, my mother, father and all grandparents had passed away by my wedding (and I had only just turned 28). I am also an only child so no siblings either. I walked down by myself and that was great, as really no one was giving me away, I was giving myself to my husband. We didn’t do father daughter, mother son dances, my DH and I danced together as did his parents.

Instead I gave a speach on behalf of my family to honour them

Post # 4
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I was going to say have your maid of honor walk you. I think having your best friend who has been with you and walk you down and give you a huge hug at the end would be so touching and I’d ball my eyes out in the audience. (even if that is your sister, maybe even sweeter if that is the instance) I’m not doing the parent dances. Not every one does and if you skip it no one will say anything.

Post # 7
Member
611 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’m in the same position… was planning to walk in together with my fiance, and we are skipping the parent dances altogether.

Post # 8
Member
342 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My father just passed away a few weeks ago. I’ll be walking myself down the aisle and I guess my mother will give me away. I think we’ll do a mother/daughter dance so my FH can dance with his mother.

Post # 9
Member
2693 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I asked my steddad… I don’t have that kind of relationship with my father and don’t want him walking me down the asile (no one can really ‘give me away’).  

However, if my father comes to the wedding I will walk myself as having my stepdad walk me while my father is present will cause drama.

As for the dances, you can just omit those or dance with your sisters to a song that honors your mom.  I am sorry for you loss and hope you have a blessed and happy wedding day.

Post # 10
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I am sorry for your loss.  I lost my father in high school and knew that my wedding would trigger some of those emotions again.  

A week before my wedding my mom wanted me to ask my godfather to walk me down the aisle so I wouldn’t be alone.  I told her that I wasn’t alone that my dad is always with me.  I had this charm made on Etsy and put it on my bouquet.

As for he dance we both danced with our moms.  Why not dance with his dad while he dances with his mom?

Post # 11
Member
18 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@aio2013:  I am so sorry for your loss.  My mother passed from cancer last year right before I  met my FI.  I just got engaged about a month ago.  I do not have any close male figures either.  Someone told me to have my FI walk with  me as a picture of us walking towards our new life together.  IDK thought because I always liked the idea of seeing him for the first time and walking towards him.  I love the idea of using your sisters though.  Their are no rules.  And they are your best friends who can support you.  As for the dance you could do lots of thiings.  You could do something in memory of him.  My FI is not going to dance with his mother, as I still do not know what I am going to do either.  But you could make it fun.  Play your dads favorite song and have everyone dance with you.  Or play a video of pictures of you two together.  Be creative.  But I am going to be careful.  I want to make it about them and celebrate them, but I also don’t want to make it too sad and with it being recent I don’t want it to be too sad for my family or me.  Hey, I would love to talk to you.  Feel free to message me.  I don’t know how to plan this wedding without my mom.  I always dreamed about the song I would dance with my dad to, and planning with my mom.  I know we need support with this.  So I would love to help you as a support with grieving and doing this without your parents.  Please please please message me!!! Let me know anything else I can do to help!!!

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