(Closed) No Flowergirl & No Ring Bearer??

posted 9 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
157 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I can’t remember the last time I was at a wedding with a flowergirl or ring bearer.  I’ve only seen the best man hold the ring…and that always seems to work out just fine!

Post # 4
Member
756 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

When my FI’s brother and sis-in-law  got married, they did not have a flower girl or ring bearer. My FI was the Best Man and said his bro just gave the rings to him to hold until it was time to put them on.  I think it was because they didn’t really know anyone with young children who could be the FG & RB, but maybe they just didn’t want to have them, which I think is fine.

Post # 5
Member
2434 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I didn’t have a FG or RB.

While we had ample children to choose from, I didn’t want the hassle.  At my sister’s wedding, my cousin’s little girl was a big pain in the butt.  She knew everyone was counting on her to walk down the aisle (she was 4 years old) so she made a big deal of it and her mom had to bribe her to get her to walk.  Oh, and she licked her fingers (basically she made a peace sign with her hand and stuck her tongue through it- if she was older it would have been obscene), refused to carry the basket (insisting she carry the tossing bouquet instead), walked hugging the pews, didn’t smile, and didn’t make any eye contact. 

It was more disruptive than cute.

Since my FI and I were averse to being at the mercy of child, we just had the best man put the rings in his pocket and that was that.

I don’t think anyone missed the FG or RB.

Post # 6
Member
484 posts
Helper bee

It works just fine. My sister didnt have either and the best man just kept the rings in his pocket. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. As her MOH I was the last maid down the isle before her entrance.

My neice will be about a year and a half at our wedding so she’ll be the flowergirl but if she didn’t exist I wouldn’t have one. We’re also asking our mutual good friend (he’s 27) to be our "bearer of the rings" b/c we aren’t having any other friends in our wedding party but thought it would be a fun way to include him. And also add a fun element to our very traditional religious ceremony.

Post # 7
Member
93 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I was in a wedding where there was no ring bearer or flower girl.  It worked fine, and I don’t think anyone really noticed (actually, even I didn’t really think about it until I read your post).  I think that the ring bearer and flower girl can be a nice addition if it works out in a wedding, but in my mind they don’t really serve a necessary purpose… flowers can either be already in the aisle or not done at all, and the rings are usually with the best man anyway, right (unless you’ve got a really trustworthy ring bearer, I guess).  I think everyone is there to see the bride and groom.

Post # 8
Member
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

My sister had the most amazing wedding…and they didn’t have a FG or ring bearer. I don’t think a single guest noticed the absence. Things actually went smoother…the size of the wedding party was ideal, and it also scaled down the rehearsal dinner size (allowing her in-laws to invite some of their out-of-town family). 

In my opinion, couples should only have these in their wedding if you’re really close to a young boy or girl. Otherwise, it’s not meaningful! 

Post # 9
Member
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I’m not having them, either.  BM will hold my ring, MOH will hold FI’s.  I’ll walk down the aisle right after my MOH.

Post # 11
Member
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

AnnieAAA we are not having a Flower Girl or a Ring Bearer either!

We both dont have any nieces or nephews and we are not inviting anyone under the age of 21 anyway.  So we decided to do without.

I will walk down the ailse directly after my MOH.

Post # 12
Member
1042 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I don’t think we’re going to have a flower girl or ring bearer either. I have some cute younger cousins, but I don’t think they are young enough to fall into the typical age ranges of those roles and would probably not want to do it anyway:D I think the event will be just fine without.

Post # 13
Member
127 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

We’re not having either and I don’t think its all that unusual… it’s certainly not worth asking some random kid if you don’t have one close to you, which we don’t.

Post # 14
Member
92 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Most of the weddings I’ve been to do not have flower girls or ring bearers. I didn’t think we were going to have one, but my fiance has a little girl cousin who is 3 and I have a little boy cousin who is also 3, so we just asked them. I’m not going to let him actually hold the rings though 🙂

I hope it goes smoothly and both Moms are planning exit strategies if something gets messed up. Do you think it would be bad if I had them walk in front of my sister (Matron of Honor) in case they needed to be scooted along, or is that bad?

Post # 15
Member
952 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

We’re not having either. There are just no children of appropriate age that we know well. They’re all either too old or too young. The best man will take hold of the rings.

Post # 16
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

The past two weddings we’ve been in/attended didn’t have a flower girl or ringbearer – for one the couples weren’t close to their young relatives or they werne’t able to attend, the second was a smaller wedding with no children at all.

If you’re not close to any kids I agree that you shouldn’t have just anyone, just to have them… the only reason we’ll be having both is that I’m quite close to my little cousins, but if it weren’t for them we wouldn’t be having either!

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