Post # 1
So my FI’s aunt is officiating at our wedding and has put together the loveliest ceremony! Religious without being overbearing, spiritual without being strange and funny without being corny.
However, I just noticed that there is no actual “I do’s”? There is the consent which we answer with, “I will” as well as the vows, ring exchange, and unity ceremony, but no actual “I do” is spoken.
I’m wondering if it will be missed either by us or our guests. It’s just such a recognized and expected part of the whole ceremony and day for that matter, I wonder if people are going to look around at each other after the ceremony like, “is that it?” Aren’t they missing the I do part?”
Any thoughts or experiences with this little detail?
Post # 3
No one is going to notice it but if you think you will miss it then have her add it. There is no reason that you can’t do it!
Post # 4
This little tidbit is actually the legal part of your ceremony that’s essential, regardless of whether you say “I do” or “I will.” I think it’s pretty common to hear “I will” in place of “I do” and I hear it in a lot of ceremonies, so I don’t think anyone will think it’s odd.
I did want to be able to say “I do” at my own wedding, so we specifically crafted our vows so that the question would begin “Do you take…” instead of “Will you take…”. If it’s important to you, it should be an easy fix!
Post # 5
Ours was the same with “I will” instead of “I do.” I think I was the only one that noticed though. I kind of wish I had read over the officiant’s script a little better!
Post # 6
We had a lovely religious ceremony as well, and DH and I also both said “I will” in place of “I do.”
I don’t think anyone even noticed- they certainly didn’t ask us about it afterwards or anything.
Post # 7
@anemonie: we did the exact same thing! I wanted “I do” so we re-wrote that part so that we’d get to say it instead of “I will” 🙂
Post # 8
I don’t think anyone will notice, but it’s you’re wedding ceremony, if you want to say “I do” instead of “I will” have your FI’s aunt rewrite it slightly.
Post # 9
I think it depends on how things are asked. If she says, “Do you…” then you answer, “I do,” but if the question is “Will you…” then you answer “I will.”
If you want the “I do” instead of “I will,” then just change it.
Post # 10
Our paster had two different ways we could answer, but since I liked the one reading better, it responded with “I will” rather than “I do.” Nobody missed it from us. I would have her change it if you are concerned.
Post # 11
I’ve been to many weddings (all Lutheran) and every one said “I will” and that’s how ours will be. I’ve never been to a wedding where they actually said I do.
Post # 12
We said “I will” There was also NO “by the power vested in me by xxx I now pronounce you husband and wife” or “you may kiss the bride” at our wedding.
Post # 13
“I will” is very common. I thnink most people won’t notice, and if they do, it certainly shouldn’t raise anyone’s eyebrows.
Post # 14
@NikkiKillpretty: I’ve never actually heard anyone say “I do” “I will” is more common and actually better. Think about which one is vowing only on a present tense stance, the other is vowing an ongoing continual stance.
Post # 15
I’ve never heard “I will”, and I plan to say “I do” for sure!
If you’re thinking about it now, change it. If you don’t, you might regret it!
Post # 16
Our ceremony has both “I do” and “I will” in it. There’s the consent part which has a question “Will you…?” and we answer “I will”. Then after our vows there’s a line “Do you make this solemn vow?” and we answer “I do”.