Post # 1
- Wedding: August 2012 - Sunset Harbour
I sort of feel like a whiney 3 year old – but it just irks me to see that the ladies have gone out after work – even some ex employees and I don’t get asked. They post it on Facebook, checking in with everyone that was there – and I am just sitting here having a pouting fit. If you don’t want to invite me, then at least put some effort into me not seeing this little get together online. Sheesh….
Post # 3
@b00kbug: Is it maybe a particular social group in your workplace that go out together? It makes sense that ex-employees who are still a part of that group would be invited and you wouldn’t if that’s the case. Maybe if you’re not particularly close with any of the women then they just wouldn’t think to invite you. It sounds like this is more of a ‘friends thing’ than a ‘work friends thing’ if you get what I mean. It sucks that people are so cliquey and I’m sorry you’re feeling left out :(.
Post # 4
- Wedding: August 2012 - Sunset Harbour
@Carlasgettingmarried: Yea I guess, it just stinks because I work in a small library – we have maaaaaaybe 15 adults working here. And everyone is very friendly here at work – and I’ve been here for 3 years so it’s not that I’m new. It just makes me want to go blaaaaaaaaaah 😛
Post # 5
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Unfriend them on FB. Obviously you aren’t their friend. Otherwise, buck up and ask them next time if you can meet up with them. Maybe they have been doing it for so long they just forget to invite you along.
Post # 6
@b00kbug: Ugh I know what you mean. There’s nothing worse then standing awkwardly while a bunch of collegues talked about how much fun they had at the awesome-thing-they-didn’t-invite-you-to right in front of you.
Post # 7
@b00kbug: UGH I used to be in your shoes about two years ago. Everyone else was friends, always drinking, doing whatever, never inviting me along and it was not fun. You can turn it around but not overnight. There’s an episode of how i met your mother where marshall starts working at a law firm and he wants to fit in so his wife and friends work ‘his thing’. Try something that works for you. You could bring in donuts and bagles or coffee. If you like sports, you can try and start a fantasy football league or be basketball bracket girl. I used to bring in chili, you can make a big pot of it in a slow cooker and bring it in for sharing, its affordable and most people like it. Usually people will thank you, then you can share something about how you made it, maybe a joke or anything to build rapport.
Here is the MOST important part-say yes to every invite!!!!! If you DO get invited to a happy hour or after work get together and blow it off…you may not get invited again, bc, well, you never go, why get the invite?
For the bold: Host a party of some sorts. You could do something fun that gets everyone involved, tastefully simple, lia sophia, mary kay or avon! Or just throw a dinner party, who cares, good luck!
Post # 8
I agree with beachbride. Unfriend them on FB, and then if they ask you why you did it, tell them the truth – you got tired of seeing them post about hanging out together and never inviting you!
Post # 9
Why don’t you try initiating a happy hour or something?
Post # 10
@sailor: I think this is a great idea. Try initiating a happy hour! I think it might go over well.
I have a few coworkers in my office who I consider real friends. We all started around the the same time and hang out together outside of the office pretty often. When we started, we tried having happy hours and other social events with other coworkers but some declined multiple invites and others are so secretive about their personal life that it wasn’t fun to socialize with them – One kept it a secret that he had a girlfriend and lived with her. No one knew until a coworker ran into him and the girlfriend at some outdoor festival. She was not happy that no one knew she even existed!
I think showing that you are interested in hanging out by organizing a happy hour or something will go a long way. If they are still cliquish, then defriend them and forget about it, not worth your time.