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Can I register for SEX?

No kiss for Jewish Brides?

posted 3 years ago in Jewish
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    1.
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    Newbee
    Hyacinth    December 7, 2008   Beverly Hills

    My rabbi says there is no place in the ceremony to say, YOU MAY NOW KISS...although we can kiss whenever we want, so should we just kiss after the breaking of the glass?

     
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    Blushing bee
    mrsbear    7/22/07   New York

    that's what we did. it's pretty natural, esp if your guests all know to say Mazel Tov after the glass is broken (we had an Jewish-interfaith ceremony so half the guests were instructed by the Rabbi right before the glass breaking as to what to do). When the crowd starts shouting and the recessional starts playing, it's only natural to want to embrace and kiss!

     
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    Bumble bee
    rebecca    September 13, 2008  

    Our rabbi is saying it after we break the glass. There's no reason why yours can't say it then. Rabbis have the strangest quirks about weddings, for some reason.

     
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    Helper bee
    ju1244    11/1/08   New York City

    My rabbi said the same, he is fine if we kiss at anytime and suggested it might make sense after the breaking of the glass but there is just no place for it in the ceremony--meaning NO PLACE FOR HIM TO SAY THE WORDS.  I dont think he was being quirky-he's so open with us about everything.  I'm sure your rabbi means the same but you should check!

     
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    EK    October 12, 2008   Seattle, WA

    Our rabbi also said to kiss right after breaking the glass.  He says they do not say 'you may now kiss the bride' because the guy never asks permission of the rabbi to kiss the bride in the first place.

     
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    Blushing bee
    Squishy622    6/22/08   Eugene, OR

    Ditto mrsbear... I hadn't really thought about it or planned for it beforehand, but it happened naturally with the flow of things right after the glass breaking and as everyone started cheering.  Good luck!

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    1. No kiss for Jewish Brides? :  wedding kiss Img 4067BWATTERSUSE1.jpg (21.8 KB, 89 downloads) 2 years old
    2. No kiss for Jewish Brides? :  wedding kiss Img 4067BWATTERSUSE.jpg (20.3 KB, 65 downloads) 2 years old
     
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    Blushing bee
    yiska    September 14th, 2008   Minnesota

    Traditionally, there is no kiss -- it's not tzniut.  Liberal streams of Judaism have naturally incorporated more modern culture and I'd say this has been absorbed as an American wedding custom in general but it's not a Jewish one, so it makes sense that there's not a place for it (the words anyway :)).  I have been to plenty of Jewish weddings where the couple did kiss and it absolutely feels natural and normal at the end of the ceremony even if the rabbi doesn't say anything.

    My FI and I are Conservative but we are not kissing after the glass is broken.  There's plenty of time in yichud for that! :)

     
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    Helper bee
    ju1244    11/1/08   New York City

    YIKSA:  Is there plenty of time in the Yichud?  How much time are you taking for yours?  Anyone care to weigh in?  I am seriously worried we dont have enough time for pictures etc Thanks

     
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    Blushing bee
    yiska    September 14th, 2008   Minnesota

    jul--are you asking if there's plenty of time in yichud for kissing?  Yes, of course.  The amount of time people take for it varies though -- we are doing 20 minutes I guess.  I've heard of people being in yichud for much longer but I think it would be boring.

    Have you considered doing photos before the wedding?  We are doing that because we want to get the reception/dinner going once we're married.  I know many people like to not see each other before the ceremony (or at least before the ketubah signing) so I understand that too.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    JewishBride    June 13, 2010   Michigan

    my fiance and i are going to kiss right after the glass breaking too. i think it will flow way better that way=)

     
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    Bumble bee
    stlginkgo    3/20/10  

    This is also a problem for Catholic weddings. There is no time to do "the kiss" I really like the ideas for after the glass breaking, very natural place for it.

     
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    Sugar bee
    2dBride    October 6, 2009   Washington, DC.

    Our rabbi told us that there is no place for him to tell us to kiss, because he didn't think we needed his permission.  However, we went ahead and kissed after the glass was broken--if only in relief, because we had a lot of trouble breaking it.  ;-)

     
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    Helper bee
    Coccinelle       Santa Barbara, CA

    lol 2dBride :) I definitely want my kiss!!

     
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    Bumble bee
    ErinMarguerite    July 2009   DC Area

    We kissed after the glass was broken, and we took about 15 minutes for yichud.

     

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