I have a wonderful bridal party of 5 close friends ( I don't have s sister) and have yet to choose an official "maid of Honor" I started to think yesterday, do I really to have to name one of them to the maid of honor position? They are all (equally) close friends who will serve as wonderful bridesmaids. So is there really a significant reason to single one out? I would hate for any of them to think that I valued or thought any one of them would serve as a better bridesmaid than another.....
My sister in law did not have a Maid of Honor. We were all close to her in different ways/ times in her life. We all planned a shower together and for her line, she just arranged us by height. If they are all equally close to you, I don't see a need for a MOH.
I have five best friends, and four were all listed as my maids of honour on the program, while my one guy friend was made a groomsman. You shouldn't have to choose, especially if they all mean so much to you. Plus, I know certain people within my group would have been heartbroken if I didn't choose them as my MOH. I had five fabulous friends who stepped up to the plate in their own ways to help prepare for and celebrate my wedding, and I couldn't have been happier.
Oh, and like mrshudson's SIL, I arranged my MOHs by height! They had personal wars against each other to have the highest heels, though... which was funny since the groom and I are so much shorter than they all are.
Choosing an MOH was a very stressful situation for me, and if I could go back, I wouldn't do it. I've known most of my BMs for 18 years or more, and there was some serious jealousy going on after I chose. I never realized being MOH could be so important because I do love them all equally. I ended up choosing the one friend I've known longest, 19 years, and he's not the MOH, he's "best friend to the bride." Of course doing that made the others think there was still room for an MOH...it never ends!
we aren't have a maid of honor or a best man either! i'm having 3 close friends as my bridesmaids while he has his two brothers & my brother as his groomsmen. we just couldn't decide & didn't want to!
If I didnt have a sister to choose as a MOH then I dont think I would have chosen at all! It's your wedding! You choose or dont choose whatever you want!
Do what you want! If I didn't have a sister, I don't think I would be able to choose either! Weddings these days are becoming less and less about "what you have to do" and more of "what you want to do"!
Also, another suggestion of how to line them up is by alphabetical order. I have my only sister, who is my MOH, then it goes in alpha. order from there! Everyone understands and no one feels hurt!
I don't have a maid of honor. I have been equally close to all my bridesmaids at different parts in my life and I didn't want to pick one. I had paired up my girls my my fiance's boys and so when he picked his order, they were lined up that way. I am happy with my decision but there have been a few wrinkles. Since nobody has been assigned, nobody thinks it is their job to give a toast. Also, fiance and I are organizing our bachelor/bachelorette parties ourselves for same reason. I am okay with this, I just thought I'd give you a heads up for things that might come your way.
No MOH for me either! I have 6 girls (yikes!) who are equally special to me. I know a few would definitely be hurt if I chose one over another. I was thinking about what order to have them walk, so the height/alpha ideas are a big help! I don't think it's a huge deal; it's really just a title and hopefully all the girls you choose will want to contribute just as much as if they had the title of Maid of Honor.
Thanks everyone for your comments and encouragement. I have a follow up question (since I didn't think of this before) Will it be weird to not have a MOH if my FH does have a BM?
I'm not worried about my girls not taking on the necessary tasks of bridal shower and bachelorette party planning, since we've all been in each others weddings and have always made it a team effort! :)
Anyone out there not have a "Maid of Honor"?
I have a wonderful bridal party of 5 close friends ( I don't have s sister) and have yet to choose an official "maid of Honor" I started to think yesterday, do I really to have to name one of them to the maid of honor position? They are all (equally) close friends who will serve as wonderful bridesmaids. So is there really a significant reason to single one out? I would hate for any of them to think that I valued or thought any one of them would serve as a better bridesmaid than another.....
Am I the only who ever questioned this tradition?
posted by ynichole 147 posts 2 months agoMy sister in law did not have a Maid of Honor. We were all close to her in different ways/ times in her life. We all planned a shower together and for her line, she just arranged us by height. If they are all equally close to you, I don't see a need for a MOH.
posted by mrshudson 45 posts 2 months agoI have five best friends, and four were all listed as my maids of honour on the program, while my one guy friend was made a groomsman. You shouldn't have to choose, especially if they all mean so much to you. Plus, I know certain people within my group would have been heartbroken if I didn't choose them as my MOH. I had five fabulous friends who stepped up to the plate in their own ways to help prepare for and celebrate my wedding, and I couldn't have been happier.
posted by NiftyBa 95 posts 2 months agovnichole - I don't have a maid of honor either! I just have 4 awesome bridesmaids that I didn't want to choose between. =P
posted by dezziemon 50 posts 2 months agoOh, and like mrshudson's SIL, I arranged my MOHs by height! They had personal wars against each other to have the highest heels, though... which was funny since the groom and I are so much shorter than they all are.
posted by NiftyBa 95 posts 2 months agoChoosing an MOH was a very stressful situation for me, and if I could go back, I wouldn't do it. I've known most of my BMs for 18 years or more, and there was some serious jealousy going on after I chose. I never realized being MOH could be so important because I do love them all equally. I ended up choosing the one friend I've known longest, 19 years, and he's not the MOH, he's "best friend to the bride." Of course doing that made the others think there was still room for an MOH...it never ends!
posted by BriLJL 101 posts 2 months agowe aren't have a maid of honor or a best man either! i'm having 3 close friends as my bridesmaids while he has his two brothers & my brother as his groomsmen. we just couldn't decide & didn't want to!
posted by misssnowflake 23 posts 2 months agoIf I didnt have a sister to choose as a MOH then I dont think I would have chosen at all! It's your wedding! You choose or dont choose whatever you want!
posted by HumarockBride 182 posts 2 months agoDo what you want! If I didn't have a sister, I don't think I would be able to choose either! Weddings these days are becoming less and less about "what you have to do" and more of "what you want to do"!
Also, another suggestion of how to line them up is by alphabetical order. I have my only sister, who is my MOH, then it goes in alpha. order from there! Everyone understands and no one feels hurt!
posted by LittleBear 80 posts 2 months agoI don't have a maid of honor. I have been equally close to all my bridesmaids at different parts in my life and I didn't want to pick one. I had paired up my girls my my fiance's boys and so when he picked his order, they were lined up that way. I am happy with my decision but there have been a few wrinkles. Since nobody has been assigned, nobody thinks it is their job to give a toast. Also, fiance and I are organizing our bachelor/bachelorette parties ourselves for same reason. I am okay with this, I just thought I'd give you a heads up for things that might come your way.
posted by jeeyol 88 posts 2 months agoNo MOH for me either! I have 6 girls (yikes!) who are equally special to me. I know a few would definitely be hurt if I chose one over another. I was thinking about what order to have them walk, so the height/alpha ideas are a big help! I don't think it's a huge deal; it's really just a title and hopefully all the girls you choose will want to contribute just as much as if they had the title of Maid of Honor.
posted by EAQ219 31 posts 2 months agoThanks everyone for your comments and encouragement. I have a follow up question (since I didn't think of this before) Will it be weird to not have a MOH if my FH does have a BM?
I'm not worried about my girls not taking on the necessary tasks of bridal shower and bachelorette party planning, since we've all been in each others weddings and have always made it a team effort! :)
posted by ynichole 147 posts 2 months agono MOH here either! Six BM, and they're all close to me. The only problem is delegating MOH typical situations. I guess I'll just split them up!
posted by mschampagne 58 posts 2 months agoMy fiance has a best man. Thats what made it easy for me to line them up, haha
posted by jeeyol 88 posts 2 months agoi didnt have maid of honor. my best friend is out of the country and she couldnt make it to the wedding so i decided to just have 2 bridesmaids.
posted by quickbrownfox 39 posts 2 months agoi don't really want to pick a maid of honor, but we already have a best man ... i'm curious to see what people think of this too.
posted by emmyleeee 44 posts 2 months ago