No One Said It Would Be This Hard…

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Vent away.

No 2 ways about it… MOVING SUCKS

Probably one of the biggest stressors in a relationship.

 

Post # 4
Member
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@renwoman:  I’m sorry to hear you’re going through a hard time. Changing circumstances can sometimes be really hard in a relationship but it sounds like you both love each other and at the end of the day, if you love each other enough, you’ll make it work. Any change can be difficult, moving in together is huge and you will both need to adjust, and you’ll both do it in different ways. All you can do is stick together, do anything you can to make things easier for each other and you’ll figure it out, before long it will be normal.

Post # 5
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Honestly when my husband (fiancé at the time) moved from Canada to Europe I probably told him 100 times I couldn’t do it. We fought literally until we got on the plane and then for 2 weeks after. I even looked at flights back home because I was seriously fed up and done. 

 

I know now it’s hard, but it gets better 

Post # 6
msjackrabbitMember
1080 posts
Bumble bee

This is why everyone says the first year is the hardest. The first year of living together is TOUGH! I remember the first day we moved in together, we were both questioning our decision because we were SO stressed.

Getting used to someones habits, being around one person all the time with no space of your own, having to make compromises over decor and what to eat and who will cook and who will wash up, the toilet seat. oh my god, so many things.

4 years in and we still bicker about things. But it’s all good 🙂 You’ll get there! x

Post # 7
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

We had a tough time when we moved in together too, but it honestly does get better!

Post # 8
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

If everything else is normally good then I would chalk it up to moving in together.  It’s a big thing to move in together and moving itself is ridiculously stressful.  Maybe set aside a night in the next week or two for a regular date night and don’t discuss the move at all that night.

Post # 9
Member
7281 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

Stay strong, lady. Sometimes, even knowing that a certain period of time will be difficult, you still feel a bit unprepared for just how hard the reality is. I agree with a PP’s suggestion to try and carve out some time together where there is no discussion of moving or wedding stuff. Just cuddle a lot, laugh together, and re-connect. It’s good for the soul. 🙂

Post # 10
Member
102 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

renwomanMoving is definitely stressful.

 

My FI was beside me when I read your post and he said “moving wasn’t that stressful when we did it.”  My FI must have been hit in the head recently!  Moving was definitely stressful for us. 

 

My FI is a procrastinator and I packed up most of his stuff when he moved in with me and again I packed most of our house when we bought our house this summer.   

 

After the moving is done your relationship will get back to normal, and it gets better.   Smile

 

Post # 11
Member
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@renwoman:  My SO and I NEVER EVER EVER fight but moving made us bicker like crazy! I actually had a melt down just after moving and said I was moving out! Just breathe. It really does get a lot better once you’re unpacked!

Post # 12
Member
1607 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

We’ve been together nearly 10 years, have lived together for 5+, and are currently planning a cross-country move–even after all this time together this move is hugely stressful!  Moving is expensive, time consuming and annoying.  Especially if this is your first time negotiating the combining of all your stuff and compromising on surprising things.  When my now-husband moved into my place we had a huge fight about how to store the dishes. For real.  Then I was thoroughly disgusted to learn he wanted to buy canned vegetables instead of fresh or frozen.  Thankfully, time smoothes these things out 🙂

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