Post # 1
So I’m new to this website but my first post was about people reacting to MY engagement ring, which by the way I pretty much picked out. It’s a .33 carat round solitaire…it’s what I wanted and I love it. My fiance and I aren’t rich by any means but we are comfortable. Yes we have bills, some student debt left from college but we are making it work just fine and still have money left over. Some woman on my post insisted that money is the only thing that matters and they don’t understand why girls would marry a man ” who doesn’t have it together”. Which by the wway I never stated that he didn’t have it together, I just said my one friend looked at my ring and didn’t seem impressed..which was rude. So my point is, money is important, you need stability or else you will be miserable but it isn’t everything. Right? 🙂
Post # 3
@FutureMrs86: RIGHT! 🙂 No argument here. As long as you love it and are happy than who cares about the price tag.
Money is a funny thing and it does strange things to good people.
(Side Note, someone accused me of being a gold digger and started running her mouth to everyone we knew. So not even the case if you know the facts about my FI and I and where we started out six years ago. I even named my volleyball team the “Gold Diggas” because I think it is so hilarious. It is now a running joke with our friends and I.)
Post # 4
I agree! Sometimes there are things that are more important than a big fancy ring. I could have had something bigger and fancier if I wanted, but that’s not our style. Instead, I got a simply beautiful ring that’s perfect and we used the money we saved to buy our first home which we’re closing on next week. Priorities!
I love my fiance and the marraige, everything else is just a perk
Post # 5
@Treejewel19: That is funny! And you don’t sound like on at all!!!
Post # 6
Absolutely right. I couldnt have said it better myself.
Post # 7
Money isn’t everything. Every lady knows her man best. We started off our lives in debt and we may even possibly always have debt. I said yes to a 1/4 carat ring. The difference is that he has a strong work ethic and we get over those financial speed bumps together.
When a man proposes without a ring, there is NOTHING wrong with that! Unless the sole reason is he dosen’t work, is a lazy a$$ and has no inention of making a better life for himself.
I think that was what people were getitng at.
Just like no one wants a gold digger, no one wants someone without ambition or the ability to take care of themselves and their partner.
Post # 8
@Just_Squeeze: That is true, it does go both ways. My Fi works hard for his money but we pay the bills first before we have our fun!!
Post # 9
i’ve always told my boyfriend that i would love to be a gold digger because it would make everything so much easier, but then this pesky falling in love thing happened to get in the way!
to me (and to most people, i think), money is a security blanket. i haven’t had to worry to much about it since i am still a student and my parents take care of me for the most part, but even with that allowance, i’ve gotten used to living below my means. i’m really crossing my fingers that when the time comes, i’ll be totally prepared for dealing with my own money. (this whole paragraph makes me feel like such a youngin’!)
in the end, of course, i find my happiness rarely stemming from things. having boyfriend would be absolutely enough for me, ring or no ring.
*cue the beatles “can’t buy me love”*
Post # 10
@laceywings: Nope, that is the one thing that money will never be able to get you…love. 🙂
Post # 11
Money is definately not everything, it’s just a tool to make your life easier, period. The way I see it, if you have enough to cover your basic expenses, plus a bit extra, you are doing okay. That is something to absolutely want, the rest is just extra. 🙂
The whole gold digger thing really grates me. I have talked to people in the past about my fiance, and mention he’s a doctor, I automatically get comments like, “you hit the jackpot”, or “you are a lucky girl”. I quickly correct them and say, “yes, I am a lucky girl. My fiance is a wonderful, loving, hard working guy and that is why I’m marrying him. That shuts them up really quick.
Post # 12
Money is not everything.
A friend of mine who was flat broke financed all of his FI’s ring b/c it was so important for him to give her a ring before they moved in together. Maybe he was not ‘all together’ in the money department at that time, but his priorities were. They got married this year, and I do believe they are very happy, fully paid of e ring or not.
My FI paid for my ring in full. He has been working for 10 years and saves more than he spends. He is someone who won’t make a big purchase unless he is able to pay for all of it. If he wanted to propose but didn’t have the money, we would have looked into a different diamond size or maybe even a diamond alternative (which I sometimes wish I would have looked into while we were ring searching, anyway!) to cut some costs. It’s not the dollar amount that he spent that is important to me, it’s the fact that he proposed and wants a life with me.
It’s all in the way you look at it. My FI might have it ‘all together’ in how he handles his money, but there are other areas of his life that he is not ‘all together’ in. My friend might be still paying on his FI’s ring, but he is very devoted to her and making a life with her. I think some people put too much emphasis on someone being perfect, when in reality, we all are good at some things, and need improvement with others. Same with our men and how they handle their money.
Post # 13
When I met FI he was jobless and lived with his brother!
Now he has a steady job and makes decent money and we live together. I fell in love with him. Not with how much money he was going to have.
Post # 14
Very well said you guys! When I was talking about ” having it together” I was talking about what someone else told me in one of my other posts. But after reading some of the other things this person posts I realize that money matters to them more than other things..which I find very sad. But you all are right! If you make an honest living and can pay your bills, good for you!!! And if you are trying to make ends meet but at least have a steady job, good for you as well. Life/love/happiness is more than what’s in your pocket book…yes it does make things easier but could you live without excessive amounts of it? Depends on your lifestyle and what is important to you. I just HATE when women think the famous quote ” all you need is love” is BS because I would take LOVE over money any day, I may not have millions in the bank but I have a man that loves me, does everything for me and I can ‘t wait to become his wife…you can’t put a price tag on that and I will argue with anyone who says otherwise 🙂
Post # 15
who cares about what others think. If you are happy with him, that is all that matters. 🙂
Post # 16
Yes, I think that is one of the most difficult things to do is not care what others think. And I know “some” people will think that I’m either very young and naive, or I am piss ass broke and still being supported by my parents. But I am proud to say neither is true. I am 25 years old, college graduate and I have a career. I don’t make a ton of money but I may enough for my FI and I and so does he. And I can also say………..love trumps having money 🙂