(Closed) no pictures during ceremony??

posted 10 years ago in Jewish
Post # 3
Member
2324 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2018

Perhaps she means by guests? That is the rule in my church and many others. There is no way she can tell you not to photograph your own wedding. Tell her that your photographer will be as discreet as possible, but to get over herself…in a nice way, of course.

Post # 4
Member
127 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I guess I have heard of it.  Perhaps you can ask her whether it would be OK if the photographer takes pictures with NO flash–that would be less disruptive.  My rabbi does not want flash or moving around so we just have to try to work around those requirements.

In the end…you could sort of give the hint to the photographer that you want her to ignore this restriction… I mean, what’s going to happen?  As long as your photographer isn’t disruptive, flashing the camera every ten seconds and walking around all over the place, I don’t think the rabbi or cantor will stop the ceremony to tell the photag to stop taking pictures. ๐Ÿ˜‰

 

Post # 5
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

she’s high. 

is it in her contract? if not, too bad, so sad. if so, then your in a predicament. 

clarify with her that your photographer will be taking pictures during the ceremony (is it outdoor during daylight? she might just be bugged by flash).

Tell your photographer to photograph during the ceremony regardless…… in this business we go by the rule that "it’s better to ask forgiveness than permission."

Post # 6
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

also, just make sure your photographer understands not to get under the chuppah. 

Post # 8
Member
2030 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

OOH! This happened to my mom 50 years ago. Their solution was to go back and "stage" the ceremony for photos moments after the real ceremony. Strange, but at least she got some photos out of it.

Post # 9
Member
127 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

ohh, teacherbride… tell your photag not to be intidimated! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 10
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee

Your FMIL probably just wants to make sure that the religious aspects of this event will not be disrupted, which is annoying but I imagine that is her reason….. I’m getting married in a SUPER strict catholic church that allows only the pro photographer to take pics and he must stay BEHIND the congregation at all times. The reason is that they want this sacrament to really be a sacrament, which i can respect but seriously…. its driving me crazy!! Also the priest actually STOPS the ceremony to yell at someone for taking a picture I’ve been told. He told me he does this not to stress me out during the ceremony, and I was like, um, this will stress me out more! Ugh! At least your FMIL budged a little bit. Tell your photographer to be discreetly agressive during the ceremony. I’m sure if he/she is really good then he/she will find a way to take gorgeous pics, so try not to worry! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 11
Member
311 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2008

My rabbi said something pretty similar.  Basically, he does not want to see the photographer or videographer during the ceremony.  He said they can take pictures, just not move around and jump back and forth.  He wants us to focus on one another during the ceremony and not be distracted by people jumping around in the background.  I actually think it makes a lot of sense.  I’m sure you’ll find a way to compromise, just recognize that your cantor is doing this to make the ceremony special for you.

Post # 12
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

most photographers and videographers these days really try and do their jobs discreetly. Priests and Rabbi’s that have this sort of clause are doing so because they’ve worked with what I like to call ‘old school’ photo/video teams who were very disrupted, had rolling tripods, walk all around the alter/ chuppah, etc. Basically your worst nightmare realized.

Let your photographer know the rules, but it’s also important to express to your rabbi/priest/officiant that the reason you hired the photographer/video to document the ceremony is becaus<span class=”Apple-style-span” style=”font-weight: bold”>e you aren’t going to remember a darn thing about it when all is said and done! (it’s called adrenaline and sensory overload).

Let the ceremony celebrant know that your photographer is ‘very unobtrusive’. It never hurts to put a good word in for your photo/video team beforehand. Often celebrants look at them with a turned up nose. The ceremony is not ‘show time’ for your celebrant, and you’d be surprised how many of them, no matter how religious do look at it as that…. especially in los angeles. ahh…. but that’s a whole other topic. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 13
Member
754 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

Photographers and videographers jumping around are the last thing that you are going to notice when you are staring into his eyes and professing your love to him.  Don’t let the priest/rabbi/minister/officiant bully you into compromising your very expensive pics/video just because it "bugs" them.

Post # 15
Member
754 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

 

Post # 16
Member
50 posts
Worker bee

If your fmil is a cantor then I assume this will be a reform ceremony, which is not super-religious by any stretch of the imagination. So this probably has nothing to do with getting in the way of the sacred moment and more about personal preferences.
You are absolutely entitled to have whomever you want outside of the chuppah! The problem arises when people want the photos up close and the rabbi doesn’t want a lens sticking under his chin to catch the bride sipping the wine etc.
With today’s tele-lens I don’t think it should be a problem, and as long as he doesn’t make her feel like he’s "invading her space".. 
 
Of course this should be handled with tact, but you’re completely in the right to have the photographer do his job during the ceremony.  

The topic ‘no pictures during ceremony??’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors