I LOVE Holidays & Occasions as much as anyone else.
But I know that as I’ve aged, I’ve also matured in my reflection upon them
I don’t have to get my pout on like I would have as a younger person, if everything didn’t go to plan
I’ve also learned to be a lot more pragmatic… if something is important to you… speak up… be accountable for it… make it happen **
In truth I am a lot more into Holidays / Occasions & Gifts than Mr TTR is.
So I’ve had to adjust my perspective since I met him… and for the most part I am ok with that.
He prefers “experiences” over “stuff”
So we don’t really have a Holiday / Gift Budget like I once did… for each other we just chalk it upto being put / added into another column now…
Dinner Out – Concert Tickets – A Vacation
The only time it gets to me somewhat is if we aren’t doing “the experience” on the specific date that the Holiday / Occasion Falls.
This Christmas we’ve both been suffering from the Flu… so we’ve been relatively house-bound the last week.
We did not exchange gifts… infact other than the fact that I made some Pies, and he cooked us a “pseudo Christmas Dinner” it didn’t feel much like Christmas at all
We have done a lot of sleeping the last 72 Hours… trying to take advantage of the downtime from work etc, and recharge our batteries, get over this nasty flu once in for all…
So to be honest where in a normal situation I probably would have been quite annoyed with Christmas Day passing and barely being marked, I’ve been too tired / sick to care too much about it.
BUT, I also know that we have some great plans for the next week… as far as “the Experiences” go… A shopping trip for an item I’ve wanted that is going to be on SALE for Boxing Week – Dinner Out with Friends – a House Party etc.
So, I’ll certainly forget about the Christmas of 2013 that didn’t really happen.
Hope this helps,
** Something I learned very early on in my First Marriage. Most Men haven’t got a clue about Gift Giving. They are the types of creatures that don’t need much to make them happy (hence WHY my mom would give my Dad a Shirt, and Socks & Undies… and my Grampa a Sweater … year in year out). Men tend to go out and buy something when they need it, and can afford it. They don’t wait for a special occasion. And they are creatures of habit (they’ll buy the same brand of socks for 40 years). Whereas us girls tend to use special occasions in our lives as an excuse to shop… Party coming up… then you need to go out and buy a whole new outfit etc.
Anyhow, the point is Men don’t have a lot of experience shopping for themselves, let alone others.
So IF a girl is one that likes Gifts and nice things… then you pretty much have to give your Guy some direction or chances are you are doomed to be disappointed. And that usually menas giving a guy a written list with SPECIFIC info on it… Item, Colour, Size, Where to Buy, even cost etc. (Men are also “fixers”… they like to see a problem and figure out a way to fix it. This is WHY they think that household goods make good gifts… it is also way easier to buy a Blender than it is to buy a pair of earrings).
Every woman I’ve ever known who came to terms with these facts about men, together set an agreed upon Budget for Gift Exchanging with them and gave them a list or possible items she’d like… has not been disappointed.
Whereas, I’ve known tons of women who have been when they’ve “romantically” left it all up to the Man to “surprise them”. More often than not in those scenarios they’ve been surprised alright, but rarely in a good way !!