Post # 1
I’m getting married May 2015 at a semi-destination location (inside of the country but everyone will have to fly). All of our key people have already been informed of the time/date and are able to come.
Could I get away with sending the invitations early instead of sending Save the Dates? For example, sending invites in December or January and having the RSVP date in March?
Have any of you done this with success or failure?
Thanks for your advice!
Post # 2
Mbs08: I’m also having the same situation with my “domestic destination” wedding but I am definitely sending STDs- and early ones at that because my month is popular.
I think more warning for plane trips the better, unless you’re secretly hoping for a low RSVP rate? If not I say just send the STDs- simple as a cheap postcard!
Post # 3
Mbs08: I would at least send a email. But a STD post card would be better.
Post # 4
I would send a save the date. It doesn’t have to be fancy. I’ve seen a few that are simple and great for “destination” weddings.
If I were flying somewhere for a wedding, i’d want at least 6 months notice. You have to buy your tickets a couple months early and you may still be penny pinching after the holidays around feb/march so it will give people enough time to decide if they need to budget for it or not. It’s a $50-$100 expense that will possibly give more people the chance to come.
Post # 5
Mbs08: You can get relatively inexpensive postcard STDs on sites like Vistaprint. Or you could send an email. You have plenty of time, what is the reason for not wanting to send them?
Post # 6
Mbs08: Why not send an emai lsave the date? That’s what we did for our destination wedding
Post # 7
Mbs08: I agree with the PPs, I think you should send something so people can prepare and have plenty of warning to be able to make arrangements i.e. kennel care for dogs
Post # 8
Thank you all for your responses!
It’s actually not a matter of costs, I have one that I love already picked out and I’ve budgeted for it. It’s more of the hassle of added logistics if it’s not totally necessary. I just don’t want to come off as rude to our guests.
The email would be GREAT but I don’t have most of their emails. A lot of those invited are distance relatives that we don’t keep in touch with that often.
MrsBuesleBee: I wouldn’t mind a low RSVP count for those we aren’t that close to. It gets pretty political in our family so I pretty much have to invite everyone. I also don’t want people to feel forced to come if they’re not able to and signal that it’s a bit more “low key” of an affair.
Post # 9
sweetchiquita12: I really like this idea. I just need to figure out how to get everyone’s email address. Did you use a company to do an e-card or did you send out an email to everyone?
Post # 10
Mbs08: I don’t think this is a matter of etiquette, for me it’s a matter of practicality. As a guest, I would like to receive some sort of save the date in this situation, well in advance so 6 months ahead of the wedding, so that I could make the proper arrangements to be there. The couple that most recently got married to whose wedding I was invited to did this and I really appreciated it. If they had just sent invites, I feel like it would have put undue stress on me as a guest to get everthing in order to attend their wedding at the last minute.
Post # 11
Mbs08: I am in the same situation as you… only idfference is I live in the destination city and everyone can drive (avbout 5 hrs away).. what we did is sent our the invite to our wedding website as the save the date and we followed up to make sure everyone checked it
I think it’s doable personally but then again I’m only having 70 people (mostly very close)
Post # 12
MissMarple: thanks! I was thinking more along the lines of sending invites 6 months ahead instead if the save the date since it includes all of the details. Would that have been helpful or do you think it would have been overkill to have the entire invite so early?
Post # 13
Mbs08: Hmm, well I don’t think it would have been a problem for me and in that case I don’t think STDs are necessary, but I think I’ve seen Bees get concerned that guests will misplace the invite if it’s sent so far out.
Post # 14
I am getting married next August and have just sent out my save the dates this week. Early, I know. But I have a lot of family that are flying in from out of state and the rest of the guests have to drive 2 hours. Mostly everyone will be staying the night and my family requested that I send out save the dates now so they can make travel arrangements. I wouldn’t have sent them out so soon, but they all asked for it. So I think your guests will need to know further ahead than just a few months- flights get more expensive the longer you wait.