Post # 1
Okay ladies, I have a bit of a delicate situation that I need your advice with. I had a miscarriage last September and am now 6 weeks pregnant. My husband has somehow gotten it in his head that ‘just to be on the safe side’ he doesn’t want to have sex until after my first trimester. I tried to reason with him and tell him the miscarriage had nothing to do with us having sex. Should I keep trying to talk to him about this or just let it go?
Post # 3
You might not feel like it anyway, TBH, so I guess it depends. If you want to have sex then you should keep talking to him. Or take him to your next Dr’s appointment. He might believe it more from a doctor that it’s okay.
ETA: Congrats on your pregnancy, by the way! FX for a happy and healthy nine months.
Post # 4
@Monny: every book I’ve read says that it is perfectly safe to have sex, and to orgasm, throughout a healthy problem-free pregnancy. of course I understand your husband’s caution, but as long as there is no spotting, you should be fine. What to Expect and other books give this info if you want a more ‘reliable’ source than me 🙂 don’t worry if you have some cramping afterwards – it’s perfectly normal and doesn’t cause miscarriage.
If you’re lucky, it will be even better than pre-pregnancy sex 😉 All the very best with your pregnancy.
Post # 5
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Hold off until your first dr appointment and take him with you. If you have sex and miscarry again, he will blame himself or you even though they are not related. A few weeks won’t hurt and he will probably feel better after talking to the dr and seeing the US picture.
Post # 6
We had sex the weekend after getting my BFP, and it caused spotting. We both freaked out and made an emergency appointment with the dr the following Monday. She said its normal because of more blood flow down there… But to go easy. So I would definitely wait until after your appointment and bring the husband.
Post # 7
I’d talk about it with him and the doc at your next appointment.
Post # 8
I’ve never heard that it’s not safe, but if it makes him feel better and you’re not suffering for it, then I guess no harm in not doing it for a while?? At least until after you see your dr for the first time and he can ask him/her himself.
I didn’t have morning sickness in the first trimester, and wanted to do it ALL THE TIME so I would have been in pretty bad shape if I was being refused, but you very well might not feel like it soon anyway, so it may be a moot point.
Post # 9
I agree with the advice to talk to your doc about it – with your Darling Husband present. That will hopefully set his mind at ease.
I know I didn’t always feel like having sex during my first trimester, but when I did, it was pretty fantastic so I hope your Darling Husband comes around!
Post # 10
@Monny: Sex likely did not cause your miscarriage, however now that we are pregnant after 2 mc’s my Dr strongly suggested that we do not have sex in the first trimester. It’s not worth the risk or worry. I didn’t really feel like it anyway so I was fine with that and my Darling Husband too. We managed. It’s only 3 months. You have the rest of your life to have sex.
Post # 11
I’d hold off until your first doctors appointment and then take him with you and have him hear from your doctor how having sex is just fine during pregnancy.