No shows at a wedding?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
3280 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Will you even notice if some people don’t show up? I know I will definitely not notice if some people aren’t there.  Honestly I’m not too worried about it, things happen. The people that want and can be there will be there. The day is not about them, it’s about you and your husband. 

Post # 4
Member
1340 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

We had no shows. They were a handfull of low class people who are childhood friends of my DH. I had one friend no show and another 2 call me the day of to say they weren’t coming. So altogether, I believe it was 8 or 9 people. It didn’t matter too much for us since we had our reception at a restaurant and they charged us per head that day.

I am not too bent out of shape about it, but I haven’t spoken to any of these people lately. My DH and I were not surprised about that handfull of his friends. We’d kind of expected it.

Post # 5
Member
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Ours wasn’t bad, we had a wedding of 230 and only two people (a couple my parents friends) called the day before to say they couldn’t make it. Everyone else was there so we lucked out!

Post # 6
Member
5460 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

We had a few no-shows, but most had decent excuses.  One co-worker’s mother fell ill suddenly.  My own grandfather didn’t make it because his wife wasn’t feeling well, so I was a little butt hurt about it but it certainly didn’t ruin my day 🙂

Post # 7
Member
2913 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

I think its normal to expect some people not to come. On the actual day you won’t even notice! Just go with the flow.

Post # 8
Member
247 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

We had one no show (that I know of). Three days before the wedding he found out someone was going to be there and freaked. I’m hoping he will be mature enough to at least send me an apology for wasting over $150 of my money. I’m still annoyed about it, but our wedding just happened this past weekend so it’s still pretty fresh. If I hadn’t known why my friend hadn’t shown up, I would have emailed to ask. Beyond that there’s just nothing you can do.

Post # 9
Member
2302 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

you operate (hopefully like the rest of your life) giving people the benefit of the doubt, and realising that freaking out won’t help. 

yes – it will be rude if people decide to stay home and watch netflix with kfc instead of attending – but what is the likelihood of that? very little, and you won’t know that anyways. 

so give people the benefit of the doubt, just like you would want if the situation were reversed and you weren’t able to make a wedding due to car trouble/sick child/ etc

Post # 11
Member
8903 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

I had a no-show as well as a couple extra +1s… and I was just so overwhelmingly happy that I hardly noticed and definitely didn’t care at all. Hope it’s the same for you 🙂

Post # 12
Member
852 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Date twin, really, is it that few days????

At this point, I really doubt I will notice if there are no shows…..though I hope if there are some drop outs then they tell me with a couple of days notice so I can bump some others up.

 

Post # 13
Member
320 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

We had a small wedding, about 75 people, with 5 no-shows. We just sucked up the cost of their meals – there was really nothing else to do. One person’s dog died, and the others were ill. Stuff happens at the last minute, and all we felt we could do is be understanding of those situations. I’m sure they would have come if they could have.

 

Post # 14
Member
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We didn’t have any no-shows or any extra +1’s, I think we were really lucky. I wouldn’t have noticed though, I was too busy dancing and enjoying myself.

Post # 15
Member
6270 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

you just suck up the cost of the meal, that’s the way it is.

you can ask the venue if they can box up extra meals for you to take home.

@Daizy914:  

Post # 16
Member
1526 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Daizy914:  We only had one person not show up – thank goodness.  And luckily our other guests at his table enjoyed his dinner – and he sent us a gift.  He had an emergency operation so I understood.

At my friends wedding – 3 people showed up for cocktail hour- but when the waiter went around asking what they ordered they said they werent staying for dinner.  My friend didnt even react to it on her wedding day, but she hasnt talked to them since. 

Somethings you just cant control – dont let it ruin your big day!

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