Post # 1
So I have been engaged for over a year and still havent come up with who to ask to be in my wedding. My Fiance has asked his brother to be his best man, and would be content with just having him and a Maid/Matron of Honor. My trouble is who to pick for Maid/Matron of Honor. The best choices for me would be one of 3 people:
1) SIL, whom I have known since I was about 10 years old. In the past, way before I was engaged, she has mentioned not to include her in the wedding party, just include her kids (my niece will be 17 in Feb and my nephew will be 14).
2) Cousin, whom I have been very close with growing up. She now lives a plane ride away, and just had her second child in Nov. I dont want to ask her b/c I think it would be too much to ask at this point.
3) Close friend that I have known since 7th grade. I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in her wedding in September. I am hesitant to ask her b/c i feel like I should ask one of my family members first, plus, I wasnt her Maid/Matron of Honor.
On top of all of that, we are having 200+ guests at the wedding. Is is weird to only have 2 people in the wedding party? I would also love to have my niece and nephew, but is that weird to just have a Bridesmaid or Best Man, Maid/Matron of Honor and 2 junior people in the wedding?
At this point it seems too late to do anything at all since the wedding is in 3 months….
Any words of wisdom are appreciated.
Post # 3
It’s your wedding – do what YOU want to do! There are no rules when it comes to the wedding party!
Post # 4
I would do your close friend. Personally, I don’t think it matters if you were her Maid/Matron of Honor, unless it really did hurt your feelings that you weren’t hers.
Your SIL obviously doesn’t want to, and your niece (IMO) wouldn’t be an appropriate choice. You might be putting your cousin out if you asked her to right now in this time of her life.
Post # 5
Have whoever you want. Seems like you’re leaning towards your close friends but are hung up on a few facts.
Now, I think its weird to ask a friend over a sister but in your case I think a close friend is just as appropriate as a cousin or SIL.
Also, who cares that you weren’t her Maid/Matron of Honor. If you’re close enough to be in her wedding I think you’re fine! 4 of my bridesmaids are married and I was only in one of their weddings. I hestitated a moment about that because I initially thought “well they didn’t have me!” but who cares! I moved around my whole life and didn’t have longtime friends since childhood the way they did. So, just because you weren’t her Maid/Matron of Honor doesn’t mean she can’t be yours.
Also, have as many or few ladies in your wedding as you like. There really is no normal anymore. I have 7 bridesmaids and every time I tell that to a vendor I get looks like I’m insane. I didn’t think it was that large until I started getting those looks but I don’t care 🙂