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It might be a bit too literal, but what about actually using a wine glass, maybe filled with rose petals to look like wine? I know I've seen small ones...can't remember where...but they were about 4" or 5" high (part of a mini picnic set or something). If you used more than one, you could get a bit more creative w/them -- lay one on its side and lean the other against it or something.
Or if you wanted something a bit more playful, you could always figure out a way to use a wine bottle opener, maybe tuck it in with some roses or something.
You could use a champagne or wine split on the top and customize the label to reflect your names and add some edible or real roses on and around the bottle.
How about using one of those heart-shaped wine bottle stoppers (people often use them as favors) stuck into the top of your cake and then surrounded by roses or rose petals? Here's an example of one: http://www.simplyweddingstuff.com/hewibostcso.html. I wouldn't stick it all the way in, just far enough that it stands up straight. That way you get some height to play with and it peeks out among the roses.
I'm not sure what your personal style or wedding style is like, but there is an etsy seller (birdfromawire) that makes small wire sculptures that often use wine corks as the base. I love her wire birds, but she also does flowers. She might be able to work with you to make something really original that fits your theme.
I had a big mop-top hydrangea as our topper and our cake was beachy, but our flowers were hydrangeas and peonies :) (the cake was homemade!)
I put some of the candy shells in/around the hydrangea and it looked cute to me!
I know you weren't impressed with the toppers you've seen but do you have any heirloom toppers? We found my grandparents topper from the 40's thats really cute. Its personal, looks like us, and its FREE.
its on my wedding planning site...
http://adaashley.googlepages.com/homeJust an idea....
This doesn't necessarily fit your theme or anything, but I love these wire tree sculpture toppers:
offbeat bride had a great idea:
http://flickr.com/photos/sarahfortune/1306793160/in/set-72157601827963393
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Has anyone ever used anything really different for a cake topper? I have looked and looked, but I am not impressed with the selection of traditional porcelain people or brides dragging grooms by the scruff of the neck. It's fine if you are into that sort of thing, but it's not for me.
I like the crystal or silver monograms people use, but sadly my fiance (who insists on having an opinion, the nerve!) has vetoed that idea.
I would like to come up with something for our wine-and-roses-themed wedding that is personal and representative of us, probably something that isn't really a cake topper at all. Has anyone used something like that?