Post # 1
Why? Because we live together.
Our choices: 1) have a rushed ceremony some upcoming Friday night where we have a tiny little wedding and then next May we have a “vow renewal ceremony” with our friends and family. 2) move out.
It’s a bummer because getting married at this particular church would mean a ton to Future Mother-In-Law. (Her daughter/FSIL got kicked out for having a baby out of wedlock and she always hoped at least one of her kids would get married there, since her family has been going to that church for 3 or 4 generations.)
Sorry, we worked hard to buy a house together. We’re not going to buy a house and rent an apartment. Nor do I want some secret rushed ceremony. It just doesn’t feel right :/
Not a real purpose, just a vent I guess. I heard some things about a non-denominational Christian church nearby who has married a few our our friends who lived together. Guess that’s our next step (even though the Sunday services didn’t mpress me once when I visited there last year.)
Thanks for listening, Bees!
Post # 3
I’m sorry. 🙁 That’s a huge bummer. But I think you have a third option – keep your original wedding date and get married somewhere else. I know it’s not ideal, but it sounds like you already have a good lead on a different church.
Post # 4
That’s the step we’re on now. I found a non-denominational church that will marry people our in living situation.
Post # 5
That stinks, I’m sorry OP. Can I ask your religion? Maybe there are other churches of the same religion you can get married in? I was surprised how much the Catholic church in my area has changed…if we got married in my father’s church there’d be no way the Priest would marry us if we lived together.
Post # 6
Why not a rushed real ceremony? I totally see where he’s coming from but I don’t see why the only options are a rushed secret ceremony and waiting another year.
Post # 7
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
I’m sorry, that really sucks. Our pastor couldn’t have cared less that we lived together. I’ve been married twice and that was the case both times. God love the Methodists!
Post # 8
That’s too bad. I know that some churches/priests/pastors are of the opinion that, if a couple is living together, it’s better to marry them (so as to resolve the situation) than to refuse them.
Post # 9
What I want to know is why your Future Mother-In-Law still attends a church that is so closed-minded? : They kicked your Future Sister-In-Law out because she had a baby out of wedlock, they won’t marry you and her son – and yet this is the church she envisions. Crazy! lol
My mother’s pastor also refused to marry my sister and her husband. It crushed my father and to this day he refuses to attend church until a new pastor comes in. He won’t speak to the man, even if they cross pathes.
I would say find another church so you don’t have to rush it 🙂
Post # 10
I guess I don’t understand why it’s a bad thing that a church has standards. That people have decided to live in the way of the world shouldn’t mean that the church has to condone what God doesn’t…
If getting married in that church is important, then conform to their rules, but at this point, I don’t know that getting married in that particular church is right for you, since you’d be doing it for all the wrong reasons.
Post # 11
Seems awfully judgemental to me (then again, I’m not a Christian anymore). I’d find a new church and keep your original date, even if this particular church does have some value to you.