Post # 1
I along with two other BMs planned my best friend’s bachelorette party for over two months. The three of us are also paying for it evenly. I wasn’t able to attend the bach party because we live in different countries and I’m already spending thousands on her destination wedding happening in a month. Because of that, I paid for the restaurant to deliver a round of drinks to all of the girls as my way of kind of being there without physically being there.
My best friend sent an email out thanking everyone for throwing her a wonderful bachelorette party. Problem is that she didn’t even include me on the email distribution. She only sent it to the girls that were physically there. I didn’t even know an email went out until one of the other BMs added me to the chain saying that all three of us BMs coordinated the event. When I saw this, my feelings were pretty hurt that I wasn’t included but I thought maybe she just honestly didn’t know. The thing is that my best friend still hasn’t acknowledged or thanked me for my participation. She emailed about something unrelated since so I know it’s not to do with her not checking email.
What would you do in this situation? Would you say something to your friend? It would be nice to be recognized in any case but especially so because she is my best friend. What kind of best friend would I be if I didn’t help plan her bachelorette. I’m turning to WB instead of asking a friend because I don’t want to make it feel like a drama. Can you think of a nice way to let her know? Or if your advice is that I should keep silent, let me know that too.
Post # 3
I would start by saying something like “did you enjoy the b party? hope that round of drinks helped the fun! wish i coud have been there since planning it was so much fun”.. i sould fish for complements lol, if she doesn’t give any, then tell her that you’re a bit hurt
Post # 4
Talk to her NOW. Tell her exactly how you feel – that you wish she’d put you on the thank you list and acknowledged your unseen, but certainly “felt” presence. This needs to be cleared between you or it will never get better. Don’t let your friendship fester. Your friend likely doesn’t realize that she left you out like that; it’s probably a stupid mistake that can be easily cleared if you both want it to be. 🙂
Post # 5
@kingytobe: Similar to what she said.
Someone else already made it known, but I would follow up.
Post # 6
@kingytobe: Thanks for your quick advice! I like that “I wish I could have been there since planning it was so much fun” haha
Post # 7
Thanks bees. Good point. I should talk to her now so that it doesn’t continue to bother me. Probably she is just really overwhelmed with the wedding planning and it was a silly mistake.
Post # 8
Maybe I’m in the minority. I wouldn’t talk to her. I mean it sucks she didn’t thank you. Maybe it was an honest mistake and its good that a bridesmaid corrected her. But did you plan and pay for the bachelorette to get recognition or because you love your best friend. While it would be nice to have a thank you I just don’t see how you would approach this or what difference it would make now.