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No boxed gifts? I don't understand what that means. I would call her and ask her to clarify so that you get her what she wants :)
My guess is she doesn't want boxed gifts at her wedding ceremony? Maybe they can't arrange wedding gifts to get to her house after the wedding itself? I'm not sure... does she have a registry? I'd call her or email her & see what she means.
Perhaps she means not to gift wrap it and just send it in regular manf boxes?
Macys has this option for you to check to be more "green" so that guests don't waste resources gift wrapping the present then putting it in another shipping container.
Is there a MOH you can ask?
Yeah, this would mean money to me.
I'm assuming that either they are having a destination wedding, and don't want to haul all that stuff back, they are moving soon after the wedding, and don't want to move all that stuff period, or they don't need anything and are asking for money and/or gift cards.
If you are close to them and can think of a place that they'd love a gift card too, you could do that as well!
No boxed gifts = money.
I will feel more comfortable sending a gift card than a check. Maybe to someplace general like Macy's, Target, Bed, Bath and Beyond, etc.
I think I'll go the gift card route. I wanted to time the gift arrival with my RSVP arrival, so this way I can just mail it together.
Thanks bees!
I'm guessing that by not asking for boxed gifts- they probably have everything that they really need and don't see the need to register and get gifts just because it's the traditional and usually most common thing to do.
Since they asked, I think that sending cash/check is acceptable. I think that by sending a gift card you're kind of ignoring the boxed gift note- i think that if you send a gift card and they open it, eventhough they could use it, money is what they want and it may be going towards something larger that they want, like a down payment on a house, or something of that nature.
Yeah, "No boxed gifts" is usually how a couple tries to express that they really can't accommodate a bunch of stuff, either because they're traveling some distance to/from the wedding or are having a long distance move, etc. I would even be careful about gift cards, because sometimes if a couple is moving internationally right after the wedding, they won't be able to use them. Just give them a check or cash, it's not tacky to give people what they want.
Whether you think it was rude or not to write "no boxed gifts," it's rude on your behalf to get them gift cards when they clearly want money and they're going out of their way to say so. Respect it or don't get them anything.
LOL at it being rude to get them a gift card. She doesn't have to get them s**t - she's not even going to their wedding.
FWIW, I read "no boxed gifts" as "we don't want to haul crap home from the wedding so either ship us a gift or bring cash/check/gift card" not "you're an a**hole if you get us anything other than money"
@shinynew: I disagree entirely. No boxed gifts does not automatically indicate that they only want cash. Period. Some people do not feel comfortable just writing a cheque and are more comfortable with gift cards. It is the guests perogative to decide what gift they are comfortable with. The bride and groom's role is to accept the gifts graciously.
Yeah, I agree with shineynew, they are clearly asking for money and not gift cards. I'm sure the reason they are not registered is that they have all they need at this point and would prefer money for financial needs maybe either to help pay for the wedding itself, or to make ends meet. It's hard because we don't really know anything about this couple--to be safe I wouldn't send them a gift card, just give them a check as it is what they asked for??
Are they already living together/have a place of their own? Is it a destination wedding? It's hard to say, if you are going to send it via RSVP either way is fine, I suppose, maybe ask someone beforehand what kind of gift card they would prefer if you choose to go that way.
You're not going to the wedding so you are definitely not even obligated to send any type of gift. My advice to you would be to send what you feel comfortable with. A lot of people just don't feel comfortable giving cash/check as a wedding gift. If you fall in that number and the bride and groom don't want traditional gifts, send a nice, heartfelt card and call it a day.
A gift card is not a boxed gift, so I don't see the issue. I hardly think it is rude as she is following the instructions AND mailing a gift early.
If I wanted money and got a gift card to Target or whatever, I would use the gift card for regular household items and therefore free up that money for whatever I wanted. You are always spending money on TP, kleenex, laundry detergent, etc.
I totally agree that a gift card is not a boxed gift. It is to be used as cash, just for that particular store. Target, Sears, etc. have things not just for the house, but as EdgyPeanuts mentioned, you can buy anything you need at Target. We received so many gift cards for our wedding (didn't have a registry) and we're all set now for awhile for so many various stores. I think a gift card is a great idea if somebody doesn't want to give cash. I definately don't think it's a boxed gift. That said, I personally think it's rude to tell people "no boxed gifts", but that's for a different thread. :) And that's just my opinion. I guess some don't see it as rude...to each his own. Also, I think it's nice that you are still sending a gift, even though you aren't attending. Most people don't (I think?), so that's very nice of you.
@shinynew: actually "no boxed gifts" means NO BOXED GIFTS. gift cards, money are acceptable. and no its not rude.
@JamaicaBride: WTG - and great point. gift isnt necessary especially since you arent even attending.
Here's a thought: the wedding is a "green" wedding and the B&G don't want additional resources used to wrap gifts, etc.
However, likely it is a "green" wedding and they are looking for some green they can spend!
Think about it, everyone wants the cash, they just don't know how to ask. Very innovative.
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I'm looking to send a friend a small gift, but am not attending his wedding. On their website, it says "we kindly request no boxed gifts." Does that mean I send a check? Feels tacky if I'm not going. Any thoughts?
Thanks!