Post # 1
Hi Bee readers,
Our RSVPs are due Monday for our Sept 19 wedding. We invited 240 people and gave a guarantee of 200 to the venue. We are currently at 160 and I don’t think there is any way we are coming to 200 with the RSVPs we still have out.
Since we have to pay for 200 guests, I would like to have 200 guests there. But how the heck do you invite guests three weeks before the wedding when it is clear they weren’t on the “initial guest list”??? Did anybody else have this problem and how did you deal with it? We don’t want to insult anybody, and the people we would be inviting are obviously people we would love to have present on our big day… but just didn’t make the cut for the initial guest list.
Any advice, much appreciated.
Post # 3
I’d contact the venue and try to “upgrade” or add to the menu. Perhaps add a course?
Post # 4
Did the guests you have already invited RSVP that they weren’t able to come, or did they simply not respond yet? If they haven’t respond yet, you might want to call or e-mail them first, especially if they’re hinting that they’re still coming. I know a lot of family members forget to RSVP or it’s something they don’t do (like in my culture).
Post # 5
I agree. You should call or e-mail first to make sure that they for sure aren’t coming before you end up inviting people.
Post # 6
Our venue had a 155 plate minimum for Saturday nights, but we knew that going into the contract, so we just paid for it and told ourselves it was a higher premium plate charge because we didn’t want to invite people just to invite them and hit our minimum plate cost. We were about 30 plates why, by the way. So over a thousand dollars.
Obviously if you had 200 people there, they’d be cooking their booties off. If you only have 160, perhaps there is something they can do to compensate you for the cost? I think an extra dessert or course or meal upgrade would be nice. But, venues are greedy so who knows. Maybe you can utilize extra decorations that they charge for. I know ours would have charged us for the bows on the chairs. But lo and behold, they didn’t.
Why are they not just taking a final head count 2 weeks before like everybody else does? Can you negotiate it back down a little?
Post # 7
Instead of asking random guests, see if you can put the extra money for 40 people toward the bar, more hors d’ oeuvres or an upgraded entree. Since you are 3 weeks out if you havent received all your RSVP’s start calling people to get answers too.
Post # 8
I was panicked a few days before RSVPs were due, but sure enough a lot came late and we reached past our minimum. Hang tight a few days before worrying!
Post # 9
you can always ring the B list people and imply you mailed them an invite and wondering why they havent RSVP’d yet… bad form i know but its one way to up your numbersq
Post # 10
@Eloping, LOL! Best response ever 😉
Thanks for all the advice thus far. We do have RSVPs out there but even if every single person who has yet to RSVP responds yes, we will still be short. I like the idea of upgrading something… we already have 5 (!) courses, so I don’t think we can add another (unless we want to roll our guests out of the venue) but perhaps an upgraded bar or something is in order. You can never have too much/too good of booze!
Post # 11
- Wedding: May 2010 - The Chesapeake Bay Beach Club
Maybe you could do something extravagant like a chocolate fountain or an ice sculpture! Ha, just trying to think of ways to upgrade from 5 (!) courses. Do you already have desserts? Maybe add a dessert bar along with cake? Or! Have a ‘midnight snack’ for those who stay late dancing the night away.
Post # 12
i would so do what @eloping did… do you have coworkers that are interested in coming?
Post # 13
I say give those a call who didnt RSVP and save your money for those who cant come and talk to the venue!
Post # 14
You can also check and see if the venue will allow you to apply the extra minimum towards vendor meals. Some venues will allow you to do this, but it is entirely up to them.
Post # 15
I like eloping suggestion… “The invite was in the mail!!!” The USPS consistantly loses things so it just might work *wink wink*
Post # 16
My fiance and I definitely got one of those calls about a “LOST” invitation…we decided to go to a football (my school vs. his school) game instead. I would say most people would figure out they were an afterthought or it would be too inconvenient for them to find a gift, make plans to go, etc.