(Closed) Not feeling the love.

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
7653 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

You need to think about it a little bit. I don’t necessarily think you don’t want a relationship with him, but I don’t think its because you are sick either. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have said he was pushy, childish, or selfish. Those are three HUGE dealbreakers in a relationship. I’d take some time to think about what he is selfish with or childish about. This doesn’t sound like a real winner or someone I would be wanting to spend my life with.

Post # 5
Member
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@LavenderMouse:  There is never a checklist for things like this.  It is something you have to figure out for yourself.  I think you need to trust your gut on this one. 

My FI can be a pain-in-the-ass sometimes but I never have any doubts about what I feel for him. 

Post # 6
Member
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@LavenderMouse:  I do love him… But right now I don’t even want to talk to him.

Honestly, there’s never been a time that I didn’t want to talk to my FH. Even in the midst of a fight, all I want to do it talk to him so we can work it out.

I’m not trying to compare our relationships. I know everyone deals with anger/frustration differently. But, to me it sounds like you really need to consider whether your SO makes your life better or worse. I’d wait until you’re feeling better physically, though. Illness fogs the mind.

Post # 9
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

In my opinion, there are times even in the very best of relationships where you do not want to talk to/be around the other person.  Those times shouldn’t be most of the time, and if you have a gut feeling that things aren’t right besides that then by all means listen to it, but I would shy away from using getting a little sick of him from time to time as a big reason to end things.  Everybody needs alone time now and then!

Post # 10
Member
340 posts
Helper bee

You need to communicate you are feeling about how he is pushy and childish and you want him to be understanding of your likes and dislikes and communicate like an adult rather than have him act immature.

If 3 months in you are seeing very bad flaws then I would be scared to think what 6 months to a year will bring. If you can’t live with his bad qualities then I would consider breaking up because a lifetime is a long time to deal with someone who is that selfish.

I had a selfish boyfriend once and I am SOO glad I ended it. It was hard to be with him and I grew to resent him so I broke it off. 

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