Not going to my best friend's wedding

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@merpitymerp:  I must admit that if I were the bride I would be a little miffed that you didn’t at least try, but I completely understand why you came to your decision. 

Post # 4
Member
4441 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@merpitymerp:  Your friend CANNOT rightfully hold this against you!  You did what you could and these things happen during snowmaggedon when you hold a DW!

Post # 5
Member
1584 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@frommisstomrs.:  +1. Obviously you can’t control the weather, but I would have been annoyed if I offered to pay for your flight, and you refused to go because it meant commuting to that other state alone.

Post # 7
Member
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

@frommisstomrs.:  But they did try.  OP said they were on the phone for 10 hours trying to rebook.

Asking her to drive or take the train from DC to NYC is unreasonable.  It’s even more unreasonable considering the poor state of transit after yesterday/last night’s storms.  I would not have even suggested you travel that far to catch a flight.  Especially with the weather we just had.  Trains are delayed.  You probably wouldn’t have made it in time anyways.

OP, this is really unfortunate, but things happen.  You will be there in spirit!

Post # 9
Member
346 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@frommisstomrs.:  Searching for another flight is trying. 

OP: Don’t feel bad. Nature isn’t always convenient. Maybe a Skype or FaceTime call before the wedding starts will make you both feel better? I definitely wouldn’t hold it against you, but of course I’d be sad.

Post # 10
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@merpitymerp:  I wouldn’t have went alone in a snow storm to try and catch a flight that may or may not have left. If she’s mad, she’s incredibly selfish. You don’t control the weather and you’d be wasting time and risking your safety for a “maybe.”

It’s not your fault at all and you shouldn’t feel bad. I’d never go to a DW without my husband and I can’t imagine anyone would expect you to, let alone in the middle of a snowstorm. My husband wouldn’t have wanted me to venture out alone in a storm!

Post # 11
Member
9533 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

YOU TOTALLY TRIED!!!!!!! 10 hours on the phone is definitely trying! You can’t control the weather. It sucks. I’m sure she’s upset. I’m sure you’re upset. But I hope she is understanding. I wouldn’t want to go without my husband either. Especially if I might get stranded in the snow!

Post # 12
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@merpitymerp:  I honestly don’t know how far it is from DC to NYC, and I don’t know how bad the weather is there, but I know I wouldn’t go out and risk it if it were a bad storm. I think you, in fact, DID try to make it by calling the airlines and seeing if there were any additional flights that you could get to easily.

Of course, I would be disappointed, but I don’t think I’d have any right to be mad at YOU.

Post # 13
Member
1500 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Seriously the OP didn’t try? Her best friend decided to have a DW in the middle of winter in some place that sounds really far away. Those are the risks that come with a DW. I would not be out there driving in this weather from DC – NY. People are getting killed in car accidents in this weather. OP, I know the situation sucks, but it is what it is, you did everything you could that also kept you safe.

Post # 14
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@merpitymerp:  Snow storms fall under the Act of God excuse.  We specifically chose to have our wedding in November over February because we knew that February weather can be unpredictable and we didn’t want any of our out of town guests to end up stranded at airports or have cancelled/delayed flights.  When she chose February she took the gamble that a freak snowstorm might cripple the airline industry and she can’t hold that against you (even if there was a small change you might be able to get to NYC for a single seat on the only flight out.)

Post # 16
Member
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

@megz06:  It can take from 2hr 45 minutes to 3hr 30 minutes train ride.  Taking the car you’re looking at 5-6+ hours depending on traffic.  With last night’s storm, she 100% would not make it driving, and I heard many trains were delayed or cancelled due to the weather.

 

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