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I think there are a couple of ways in looking at this:
1. Claps to you for knowing what you want and finding it!
2. A lot of people want to share with you the day(s) that you go and try on dresses. I ended up buying mine in China but I went to a store so that my mom could see me trying on dresses. You can't take that from them if they really want to do it.
3. Sometimes, you find something there that suits you that you never would have thought you'd like.
I think that dress is gorgeous and classic!
If bridal stores aren't your style - don't do it!
haha tell them to suck it. the time i caved and went to a bridal shop i hated it, the ladies were snots and I ended up buying my dress online. It's way better, you get awesome prices, and how easy is it that things arrive on your doorstep? just do what you want and be happy!
If you're not a shopper, and you don't like that whole scene, GO WITH YOUR IMPULSE and skip it.
Hands-down the bridal salon "experience" was the worst part of wedding planning. If I had to do it all over again, I'd get a j.crew dress. Love it!
I don't see the big deal about going to a bridal salon...sure I had a nice time but had I not done it I don't think I would have missed out something great. I like the jcrew dress I have just heard they are very very sheer and clingy. I heard spanx work really well under their dresses.
I did the same thing for the same reasons. I love your dress too!
Of course, now I feel very weird about not getting the full *bride* experience (that I didn't think I wanted...oh, this wedding industry!), so I may go try on dresses just to say I've done it. I don't feel as pressured knowing I already have the dress, and if there's something spectacular on ultra-clearance (wishful thinking), I've only spend about 80 dollars on my J Crew dress (I got mine during a final sale).
Actually, I really enjoyed my bridal salon experience. Not that I actually bought anything from there... lol. I went to a really expensive salon in Dallas Warran Barron's and honestly, I had a GREAT time with the girls there. And if I could afford it, I would buy from them in a heart beat. It helped that I was the only girl in there by appointment and I didn't feel rushed, or pressured. It was like a couple of girls playing dress up.
If you don't want to- DONT. It doesn't matter. Going to a bridal salon doesn't make you a bride. A lot of people buy into the routine of planning a wedding, as if doing this, that and the other thing make you more bridal or more ready. I say if you have found the dress, move on!
I actually only tried on one dress. I had my dress custom made and tried on one dress to see if I liked a particular waist type. I am a little sad that I didn't get to go and try on a million dresses, but to each his own.
and that dress is gorgeous!
That dress is stunning. I love it!
I wasn't really keen on the idea of going to bridal salons, either. In fact, they made me nervous and stressed. Haha. But I went anyway because one, I honestly didn't know what styles would look good on me, and two, I figured I could go once, and if I hated it, not go back.
In the end, I'm glad I went ONLY because I really discovered what looked good on my body type. It really opened my eyes to dresses and sillouhettes and stuff. I mean, I'm pretty good about dressing my body for everyday, but evening dresses was a whole other story, and I found so many things I thought I could never wear, I could.
I ended up going to a few salons and purchased a tea-length BM dress in white because it was me, and I felt amazing and comfortable in it. However, that was only because I wasn't finding anything online or at department stores I really wanted. The bridal salons always made me feel weird and silly, but in the end, I'm glad I endured them.
I was in the same boat as you. I went to two places: 1) the Brides Project, which is a place that sells pre-owned gowns for charity and 2) BCBG in a mall. I got my dress at the second because the dresses at the first were mainly the poofy-type that I was not looking for.
The second dress was one I had been looking at for months online and really wanted. I still took my sisters and my mom. And best part, two of the girls from the store still stood around and oohed and aahed and clapped when I decided to get it hahaha! There was much less 'sales' pressure, they were not snobby jerks, and they even told me I can come back before the wedding to any of their stores and get my dress steamed.
Follow your gut!
Like Carrot Cake said- going to a bridal salon does NOT make you a bride! Getting married does! That being said, is your mom totally set on having that experience? Go ahead and order your dress (it's absolutely classic and beautiful, BTW. And the back is awesome!) but if your mom really wants to see you try on a bunch of different dresses, make sure you humor her just a little. You won't feel as much pressure to buy if you already have one, plus you might find something you totally didn't expect to fall in love with.
I wanted a J Crew dress . . . I ordered several, but they didn't fit right. I ended up going to a bridal salon (more for my mom--I think she had fun), but mostly to get a better idea of what looked best. After lunch that day, we headed to the Brides Against Breast Cancer sale where I found my dress. It wasn't what I thought I'd get, but it really is me. I went to another salon later and still decided the dress I have was the best. Sure, there were lots of dresses that I thought were beautiful, but when I put them on, they just didn't work. You know it's sad when your own mother laughs at you!
I'm with ya- I was dreading the experience. I ordered a couple online that just weren't right so I finally bit the bullet and went to a bridal salon. I chose a tiny one that I found on Yelp and was determined to make my choice in 1 visit. All went well and I found a beautiful dress but I just wasn't into coming out of the dressing room and hopping up on a pedestal for a big reveal. That's just me though- I'm kinda private and older and just not that into the dress shopping part of getting married. Nothing wrong with it if you enjoy it but if it's not your thing I don't think you miss out on anything by getting your dress online as long as you love the dress.
that dress is beautiful!
I'm not going into a salon either - my dress has been ordered online, and I'm completely happy. (though, a bit nervous about buying something I've never tried on.)
I don't think you're missing anything except pushy sales women. Just wait until your dress gets shipped to you - you still get to have that "moment." =)
The salon experience is overwhelming. I did not like. Too frustrating and too much going on for me. I don't like the people hanging on me and fluffing over me. I wanted it to be as simple and hassle free as possible!!! I went to a couture shop AFTER i bought my dress, with mom and dad, just for kicks, so *they* could experience it. It was much funner knowing i'd already bought my dress.
That Jcrew dress is absolutely gorgeous. Gorgeous. It's a little sexy, but as long as you aren't crazy busty (use some hollywood tape, maybe get a little nip pad sewn in) you should be A-ok. I think you could wear some really nice jewelery with this--whatever you want! And a gorgeous hairpiece and be glam.
And, the price is RIGHT. If you are a student...you get 20% off at J Crew, call their customer service line! May not apply to dresses like this tho
I think your dress is so lovely and I think it's great that you bought it online.
I think people can get so caught up in weddings that they forget that this is supposed to be a representation of you. It should be "your' style - period. And if your style is not ruffles and fluff, then that is not "less wedding" than any other style.
I love that your dress doesn't look like 99% of dresses out there. I like that women are embracing styles that are sophisticated and womanly. It's your day and your dress should, first and foremost, feel like you and not some preconceived notion of what a wedding dress should look like.
I can relate to not wanting to go to a bridal salon. So far it's been the only part of the process that made me cringe. Luckily the girl who helped me was super cool with great taste, but I still felt like an alien in that store with rows and rows of gowns that looked like costumes. I kept saying "I don't like these. Maybe I just don't like wedding dresses." I finally found a simple one that felt really lovely on. I didn't cry or get emotional. I'm just happy to cross one more thing off my list!
I feel the same as you, Ms. Min Pin. I'm having a small civil ceremony and can't have the fluff and lace. It's been difficult and I think I may end up using a dress from Anthropologie that I bought on ebay.
I think you may be able to find the dress you like on ebay as well. Otherwise, next week there is supposed to be a JCrew sample sale in the city that you should check out. Google "SSS sample sale NYC" and there should be a listing.
I hope that info is of help!
:-)
Thank you for all the positivity!!! so reassuring! All that I envisioned about going to a bridal shop was a pushy salesperson and being incredibly annoyed. I plan on having some people over once I have the dress, having some champagne and a little fashion show! Its funny my mom has not even mentioned going to look for dresses with me..(it would be hard to coordinated since I am in NY and she is in FL) and even after I told her that I had found one. One of my good friends said "be true to you" and that has been my personal mantra...I've never been one to really care what others think...but its so easy to cave into that pressure of everyone telling you how you should do it. My personal inspiration was Carolyn Bessette Kennedy...she was so understated, elegant and classic...I feel like sometimes the dress overshadows the beautiful girl wearing it, where it should really enhance and let yourself shine though.
I agree with everyone else, I would have LOVED to avoid it if I could have. But I found my dress in a store, and I love it!
I will say this--going to the Brides Against Breast Cancer sales/stores are a great way to find out what looks good on you, and if you find "the dress" there, no sweat because it is cheaper and going to a good cause! I did that and I would 100% recommend it!
I went to a salon but only because I had no idea what would look good on me. My mom and MOH had a ton of fun but in the pictures my facial expression looks more like someone is torturing me then me having fun. I'm glad I went to understand what looks good on me as the dress I ended up getting is a shape I would have never even tried. Also I'm glad my mom and MOH got to have the experience because they seriously had a grand old time.
Personally, I thought shopping for a bridal gown in stores has been the most fun for me in the wedding process so far, and I actually miss going to bridal shops now that I have already ordered my gown. But, not every girl is the same, and since you already know what you want and know your style, do what and how you want to do! There is no "right way" to do it, and just because everyone is doing this way or that way, doesn't mean you have to do it, either.
A friend of mine got married in that dress and she looked awesome. I too mostly avoided the bridal shops of horrors and feel very fortunate to have done so.
i went to a couple bridal salons but had a hard time since I'm a 14 and I couldn't fit into some of the dresses. I ended up ordering a dress from a online bridal store and loved it when it arrived.
You know yourself best! I had a blast trying on dresses, but completely understand it's not everyones "thing". I think the dress you found is amazing and if you KNOW it's what you want (and I really think you do) then go for it!
You really aren't missing out on anything!
I think your dress is beautiful!
And I'm so with you on the peeing thing. That is #1 priority for me too-- I don't need to get THAT close to my girls on the day :)
Your dress is beautiful :-) Doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. For me, it was about spending time with my MOH as well as finding a dress. We had a great time, but we both love to shop! If that is not you, definitely skip it. At the risk of sounding trite, it is your day! go with your guts!
Very pretty. As long as it's your style then go for it! You know you don't need to have someone else go to the bathroom with you in a big dress. I had an A-line and was fine by myself just had to take my time.
Your dress is beautiful and you need to do what works best for you.
I actually liked trying on wedding gowns, and I didn't find the sales people pushy at all. But that's me. If you don't want to try on wedding dresses, then don't. Its YOUR wedding and you should be able to do what you want.
Everybody has their own wishes and you found one gorgeous gown btw! I think if you're not comfy w/the bridal shops then so what? You obviously found a beautiful and elegant gown without all that!
Ebay Ebay! I just bought a jcrew Sabine dress for $175 -- store price is $695. It's never been worn and it's gorgeous. Best yet, since jcrew is a regular store with size charts on their website, I knew it would fit.
Before this I had only bought little things on ebay so I was definitely a little nervous, but I'm glad I did it.
I also didn't want to go dress shopping, so I started by ordering dresses on nordstrom.com and returning them if I didn't want them. I still have one at home I need to return... =]
Best Wishes!
I think it's awesome you know your own mind and found something you liked with so little fuss, but then, I despise shopping. It's bad enough struggling in and out of clothing in a fitting room by myself. I can scarcely imagine having to do it with bridal salespeople attending me. I won't be stepping foot in a salon either and would simply tell the critics that you've already found your dress so they shouldn't worry about you. Most of the people in my life also know me well enough to know they wouldn't enjoy such a shopping trip with me anyway, because I'd be very cranky.
It's sad to see but the wedding industry is FULL of people telling you what to do... the bridal shop, the invitation girl (or guy), the wedding planner, the minister, the State - who else - oh yeah the bridesmaids LOL
Anyway it's hard to find your own voice in such a hurricane of people pushing you to do this and that.
I browsed lots of sites online, and that's how I picked my gown! You have time to deal with the bridal shop lady when you show up for alterations....
And my most heartfelt suggestion is... go by yourself!!! No moms, no FMILs, no friends, no BMs. Why? No pressure to choose this or that, try this or that, consider this or that!
I wish you the best of the luck possible. And if you feel like corresponding with me I'm here :)
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Is is strange that I have no desire to go dress shopping? I want a dress, but can't stand the thought of going to an actual bridal shop...I know what I did not want in a dress...no bling, no lace, not strapless, no poofy ball gown (I want to be able to go to the bathroom by myself :) Everyone keeps telling me that its part of the experience to go shopping for a dress...actually everything people tell me is "you have to do it this way" and when I ask why there is no real answer other than that is what everyone does...so I have found my dream dress online with JCrew. It afforable, beautiful and most importantly me.
what do you think:
http://www.jcrew.com/AST/Browse/WeddingParties/Wedding_Bride/gowns/PRDOVR~72169/72169.jsp