Not Inviting A Former Best Friend

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2421 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

@JessicaJupiter:  I wouldn’t bother inviting her.  It’s clear that she thinks the relationship has run its course, its too bad she couldn’t be more mature about it.  Open up that space for someone else or take the savings. 

Edited to add:  And I’m sorry you had to find out all of those things through third parties.  

Post # 4
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I wouldn’t invite her! She doesn’t seem interested in being your friend at this point.

Post # 5
Member
2576 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@JessicaJupiter:  Yikes. It seriously sucks when people “go cold” on you without explanation, but yeah, I echo PPs – do not bother inviting her.

Post # 7
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2005

@JessicaJupiter: I had a similar guest list situation. This is how I decided:

If she was getting married and you didn’t get an invitation to her wedding would you be upset?

If yes you should invite her if no then don’t invite her. 

I decided that if she was getting married I would be upset if I was not invited. So, I invited her. I’m glad I did. 

(Just wanted to be clear that I am not saying you need to invite her. I’m just saying I can understand and this is how I decided 🙂 Hope it helps!)

Post # 8
Member
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

If you’re only inviting your family, definitely don’t include her. 

If you were also inviting your neighbours, co-workers, and other acquaintances it would be a different story…

Post # 10
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2005

@JessicaJupiter:  I totally understand. It’s a hard situation to be in. If you’re not ready to make up your mind on inviting her I don’t see any reason you have to send out the save the date to her right now, or even at all. You can skip her save the date in general and make the decision in a few months when you send out the invitations. It’s not a big deal. Besides in a few months you may have stronger feelings one way or the other. It’s better to do that than invite someone you don’t want to come. 

 

 

Post # 11
Member
1503 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I would not invite her. Sounds like there are other people that would better appreciate an invite.

Post # 12
Member
352 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I definitely wouldn’t invite her. The fact that she has seen your mom and doesn’t have the courtesy to say hello? Not cool.

Post # 13
Member
3097 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - A court...

Don’t bother :/ It’s not like you guys were close but you still catch up from time to time, she doesn’t even bother. Heck, it seems like she tries to avoid you. This is you and your SOs special day & she doesn’t deserve to be there. 

Post # 14
Member
5012 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

@JessicaJupiter:  I would not invite her. She doesn’t seem like she has any interest in being your friend any longer. And you know what – she’s acting like a jerk so you shouldn’t even want to be her friend! 

I understand how hard it is when friends drift apart. My (ex) best friend set me up with my FI and we are no longer friends – she is not even getting an invite to my wedding. At first, I really wanted to make amends, but I realized what she did was unforgiveable and my life is so much better (and drama free) without her in it.

She has also made NO effort to talk to me (I kind of just stopped talking to her and let us drift apart instead of confronting her about my issues with her)  so that to me means she truly was not a friend in the first place. 

Post # 15
Member
1584 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@JessicaJupiter:  This doesn’t sound like a dilemma to me. You aren’t friends. SHe has no interest in seeing you when she is in town, and has in fact tried to avoid you at the mall. DON’T INVITE HER. EASY.

Post # 16
Member
2189 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I wouldn’t invite her, I don’t think you guys are friends anymore. It’s sad but it happens, we all grow and change.

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