- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
I'm so sorry your family is dealing with this. It's so hard to love a person who is being self-destructive and damaging her life (and the lives of those who love her).
Be there for your uncle and your cousins. Be there for your aunt as well if she reaches out to you.
Can she get therapy of some sort? Can her medications be modified to curb her distructive behavior? Perhaps you can find some resources for your aunt, your uncle and your cousins and pass them on? I'm sure your uncle has his hands full, so if you can do some leg work for him- find a support group, a new doctor, a new treatment, something they can try that can give them hope for positive change that will be a help?
Keep in touch with her. If she ever comes to her senses, she will need your love and support to get her life back together.
Good luck. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
I would sit down with this Aunt and tell her you love her but she has a sex addiction and that she is THROWING away everything precious in her life and that you don't support her actions unless she gets help.
She may very well be depressed due to the physical condition but there is NO EXCUSE under the sun for doing anything like that. Everybody has their own crosses to bear in life and she as an adult should have learned from her prior dalliance with the affairs.
It seriously sounds like an addiction. She should seek professional help asap. I will be saying a prayer for your family and uncle. Bless him, he's a better man than I am a woman..I would walk in an instant if my partner were unfaithful like my xh was.
OK, I feel the need to point out that it isn't MS doing this to her, it's probably manic depression, bi-polar, something similar. I wouldn't count those as side effects of MS. So, the first thing her family {you included} needs to do is stop letting her use that as an excuse. She has a horrible condition that makes her life horrible and hard to deal with, but to justify total disregard for others feelings and quality of life is not a side effect. It's a whole separate issue and needs to be treated as such. My mother was diagnosed 22 years ago this September, so please understand that I know what you and your family are going through. I'm so sorry that this is happening, but she's got to be held accountable for her actions or she's never going to change. I would support your uncle and cousins right now. They need it. Good Luck.
I was going to say something similar to Kate, lest anyone misunderstand MS... Her actions have nothing to do with MS or MS medications, but probably something else going on with her.
Personally, I would recommend a solid psych evaluation to determine the underlying causes of her seemingly manic actions.
I wish you all the best of luck. It must be really hard for you.
lots of hugs for you and your family!!
005.JPG (3005.8 KB, 30 downloads) 1 year old 
Lots of hugs to you and your family! Right now, the best you can do for her is to be there for her, your uncle and your cousins. Their world is collapsing as they know it, and being there for them is the only way you can help. Please don't blame yourself and say tht you should have been there for her more...there's only so much you can do. I think the other posters are right in that she has other underlying issues other than MS, and would greatly benefit from a psych evaluation.
Best of luck to you and your family.
:-( that's hard to go through. It sounds like you're doing what you can to be there for your family, though. Often there's only so much you can do to actually change a situation, so don't feel guilty. Just let your aunt (and your uncle and the rest of your family) know that you're there for them. I'm sure that means a lot.
You'll be in my prayers!
I just wanted to thank you guys for your honest advice and support.
I am trying my best to be there for my family, and I hope and pray that she will get the help that she needs, but in the end it's all up to her and my uncle, so we'll just have to see what happens.
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| ndreighton | 5 |
| Suikerbossie | 5 |
| Miss Godiva | 3 |
| Future Mrs K | 3 |
| Rivendeler | 3 |
| janetsnakehole | 3 |
| krisanne | 2 |
| hamikay | 2 |
| aussiebee | 2 |
| PaulBabyBallerina | 2 |
Sorry, there are no users yet.
Hey Hive-
I could really use some support tonight. I just got a frantic call from my mom, and got some bad news about one of my close aunts. (No, she didn't die or anything like that)
This aunt is one of my mom's two sisters, and both of her sisters live close to my grandparents about two hours away from us. A long time ago (7-8yrs) this aunt was diagnosed with MS (multiple sclerosis). It effects her nervous system, which then effects her both mentally and physically. We used to be really, really close, but because of some of the side effects of her disease (depression, anxiety, etc) we drifted apart within the last few years. She's on lots on antidepressant meds and other similar meds for the mental problems associated with her disease. The bad part is some of these effect her in other ways too, such as making her more likely to take risks, being unresponsible, etc (Note*We know part of this is from the drugs as other people on same drugs had the same reaction to them).
*I know this is getting long, hang in there with me*
A few years ago it came out that she was cheating on my uncle. It had been going on for a long time. Actually, it happened very early on in their marriage (they've been married for almost 21 years), and then when it happened again it was with the same guy. Along with this she's started being completely irresponsible with money, so much so that my uncle has to work extra jobs and cut her off from the credit card accounts.
Just tonight when my mom called, she said that my uncle had went to answer my aunt's cell phone when it went off, and he found a huge number of dirty text messages with some guy he doesn't know. Apparently it was like a sex-line thing?
My aunt and uncle have two boys, 12 and 9, and they have no idea about any of it. They are the reason why my uncle has tried to save the marriage so many times.
I feel really guilty because I had been trying to really reconnect with her lately, especially with the wedding stuff. She doesn't have a daughter and people have always told us from the time I was little that she looked like she could be my mom. It breaks my heart because I really truly believe that part of why she does these things is because of the disease and her meds. The last time she cheated, she told me about it before any one else knew, and I felt like it was a secret I had to keep until I finally broke down to my Grandma one day. I didn't know about it this time, but I keep thinking of little things that I've seen her spend money on (sometimes for me) or times when I should have been there for her but I wasn't.
I'm just really scared for her and my cousins right now, and I feel like there's nothing I can do to help...
*Thanks for anyone who stayed with me through this whole thing. I just really needed to let it out*