What should my brother do at my wedding?
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Invitation wording - HELP ME
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Not sure how to write the invitation because of step-mom

posted 4 months ago in Etiquette
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    allycat7813    June 9, 2012   Somerville, MA

    So my mom and dad are divorced but both paying for my wedding equally. My step-mom has been around since I was 4 and we are somewhat close. She is paying for the bridesmaids dresses as a gift and she might pay for some other dinner or brunch. Also, if I lived in the same state as my parents I'm sure my step-mom would be helping me plan the wedding. My mom and step-mom don't really like each other that much. So here is my question... Do I just put on my wedding invitation my mom and my dad or do I put my step-mom also even though she is not giving much monetary support to us? I have been thinking about asking my dad but he would say of course put her on there, then I thought I should ask my mom if she has a problem with it because she might. I don't want to hurt my step-moms feelings but I don't want to hurt my mom by acknowledging her on the wedding invite. Help!

     
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    MissBananaBread    October 26, 2013   Birmingham, MI

    I am in a somewhat similar situation, so I think I am going to use "Together with their parents" to avoid hurting anyone or singling anyone out.

     
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    allycat7813    June 9, 2012   Somerville, MA

    @MissBananaBread:

    Problem is we are not paying really for anything so I think "Together with" isn't correct. Or is it?

     
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    nycbrde2011    June 29, 2012  

    I have a similar situation FIs parents are well off and paying for most of our wedding. My Dad is paying for my wedding dress and maybe a few other things. My mom was not financially able to contribute anything. So I struggled with the invitation because most have the brides parents would like to invite you ....... Also my parents are divorced and my Dad is remarried. So i didnt want to have m Dad my step mom my mom and Fi parents would like to invite you lol. So me and FI talked about and just went with a vague " We are delighted to invite you to the wedding of...." Still wish I could have added them somehowEmbarassed

     
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    MissBananaBread    October 26, 2013   Birmingham, MI

    @allycat7813:  I think it works, even if the couple isn't paying for anything.

    "Together with their parents, Ally Cat and Tom Cat request the pleasure of your company..."

    You and/or your FI are in part requesting their company, and the fact that it mentions parents at all implies that you guys aren't paying for everything.  If you want, you could make it say "The parents of..." instead.

     

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