(Closed) Not sure I'm waiting any more :(

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
646 posts
Busy bee

Dont look too deeply into this.

1) Maybe there is a reason why his friend is asking him if he is proposing

2) Guys talk weird to eachother. Of course hes gotta be manly and laugh it off

3) Doesnt sound like he has said this to you???

Chin up…while its upsetting, I dont think its consitutes questioning your relationship.

Why not tell him that you saw the texts, and ask him what they meant??

Post # 5
4478 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I know it was painful to read, but to me that text doesn’t make it clear he’s not thinking of proposing.  It just meant he wasn’t thinking of it that night.  You have not said anything about whether or not he wants to marry you.  Have you guys talked about this?  Has he said you’re the one, anything like that?

If you’re not sure what to do, “I would really like to be engaged and start the next stage of our relationship, but I don’t know if you’re on the same page” is a start.  You should be able to have an open, honest discussion about this.  You can’t make progress if you’re silently hoping he’ll read your mind.

Post # 7
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

So…you guys haven’t had the Talk, or set any kind of direction for where you see the relationship going, and when?

I think you need to stop playing guessing games and just have a real conversation with him. How your relationship progresses isn’t just up to him!

Post # 8
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I think it’s great that his friends are encouraging him to propose. I’m not sure how much conversation you’ve had about your future, but this is not a big transgression, IMO. Be happy his friends are supporting you two and want him to marry you!

Post # 9
646 posts
Busy bee

@Gorjuss:   I re-read it and thought something looked different!! Either way, this is a great opporunity to bring up your future to him and see where he really stands!!

Post # 10
2894 posts
Sugar bee

Yeah, I don’t see how that means he’s not thinking of proposing at all…ever. Technically, his friend asked if your SO was proposing specifically tomorrow night. To which he responded “no.” That’s the black and white of it. 

As to your concern which is technically an interpretation of what occurred: I think you need to ask him. Just tell him you saw the other conversation when he was showing you the joke and you wanted a quick clarification. Did he mean that he has no plans to ever propose or was he simply, literally saying he wasn’t proposing tomorrow night because he already has plans.

By not asking you’re just torturing yourself over something that could have simply been a misunderstanding. Don’t give up hope on a relationship before you have solid information. 

Post # 11
3220 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

@crayfish:  agreed.  I’m sorry, this sounds crappy to read, but it’s better to know! sit him down and say, “hey about those texts… do you see us getting married? if so, when?”

Post # 12
1475 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I think the fact that the friend is asking about a proposal means that the boys have talked about it and the friend was wondering if tonight was THE night…hang in there and wait out your timeline, he might still come through with it, have a little faith and good luck!

ETA: Since you guys have already discussed a firm time line, if i were you I would just let it be, he knows how you feel and where you stand on that, right? Also, if he’s got something coming, you don’t want to ruin it, I suggest being a bit more patient, hopefully he wont dissapoint.

Post # 13
785 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I wouldn’t mention that you saw the texts.   But in about a week or two you can bring up a conversation about your future since you are getting close to your three year mark.  See if he’s still on the same page as you.

Post # 14
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I never let on that I was waiting when I was (for about 2 years). I assume my Fiance was the same way with proposing. He could just be downplaying the possibility because he doesn’t think its anyone else’s business.

Post # 15
5966 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Uhhh, I think your way off track on this text message translation…I would disregard it totally and stay happy!

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