Post # 1
I just want to start by saying that I won’t be having any kids until like 2016 or 2017, so I’m just trying to figure out future plans! I will be the main, and possibly sole, breadwinner in the family. Basically there’s a good chance that we won’t be able to survive if I’m not working. I’ve seen women in my field lose their location and schedule after taking more than 3 weeks off for maternity leave and that would be awful too. Granted, they don’t lose thier job or salary or anything that would cause legal issues…. they just have to go work in a different location and usually undesirable hours for a while. My fiance is all for being a stay at home dad and our kids will never go to daycare!
So, has anyone giving birth and gone back to work in a week or so? I know there will be issues with breastfeeding and maybe driving and heartache, but is it possible? Is there any hope for breastfeeding if I go straight back to work? Anyone have experience with this? I’m also kinda worried people will think I’m a cold, heartless snake of a mother for going back to work :-/
Post # 3
Generally you will need 2-3 weeks to recover. I know some people go back after 3-4, but a lot of times you are not cleared to go back to work for awhile.
However, what line of work are you in? Can you take sick or annual leave for maternity leave? I know I will be taking 12 weeks of sick/annual and my FSIL gets 12 weeks paid that is extra (meaning she isn’t charged leave). If you go on the job market between now and then, this is a good thing to negotiate.
EDIT: didn’t fully read your post. If it is just schedule, you may be able to negotiate that. When you get closer to when you have kids, negotiate that during your performance review. I know I am negotiating in telework 2 days a week to be closer to my kids.
Post # 4
I don’t think I could have gone back after a week. I was not cleared to drive for 2 weeks. I honestly think that is a little unrealistic. I think I could have gone back at 3 weeks if I HAD to. What would happen if you had to have a c-section and couldnt go back for at least 6-8 weeks or whatever?
Post # 5
In high school, I worked with a woman who gave birth and went back to work a week later. And I worked at a fast food restaurant, so it’s not like she was sitting around all day – work was work. So, I can tell you that people do it. As to how she felt about it? Not sure, I wasn’t close to her or anything. Anyways, I’m in similar predicament as you. (We can’t survive on solely DH’s income, either.) Since we won’t be TTC for a while, what we are doing is putting away money each month into saving for when I go on maternity leave so that we don’t go broke!
In your situation, perhaps by the time 2016/2017 rolls around, you’ll have enough to cover living expenses for at least 4-6 weeks?? Just a thought 🙂
Post # 6
omg I can’t even imagine! Giving birth is a major thing, your body needs to recover. And babies eat every 2-3 hours for the first few weeks, so the idea of keepinig up with that, recovering and working sounds pretty darn awful to me. The earliest I know anyone went back to work was 6 weeks and I know it was REALLY hard, but you could do it if your husband is a SAHD and is going to take night duty.
Post # 7
I have a friend who worked with someone who scheduled a Caesarean for a Friday (worked up until the Thursday before), and was back in the office on Monday morning. Extreme, but it worked for her. There’s a lot of variables at play, like the physical strenuousness of your job, how difficult your birthing is, etc. Also, I don’t think she breastfed, but I would assume you could when you’re at home, and then just pump/store during the day.
Side thought: do they treat vacation differently than maternity leave at your company? That could give you a few more days to adjust/recuperate before heading back to work. Not an ideal solution, but it could work for you.
Post # 8
@starbuckslover: my cousin did the same – but her baby was in the NICU and she wanted to save her time for when he came home. (he was born at 24 weeks – at almost 6 months old now, he’s doing GREAT)
I went back at 7 weeks. It was tough. DH is home with DS and even though I miss him like crazy, I am happy that the “other” in his life is his dad. That, I think, makes it a little easier on going back so early. My work will only guarantee your job back for 12 weeks off and I was on bedrest for a month before he was born. I don’t know if this is everyone, but I certainly don’t care as much about my job as I did before DS. These days I figure I can only do what I can within the 8/9 hours and that is all. After that I am mom and answer to a different boss. I used to take so much home with me and stress and now I just don’t. I never thought that would be me, but it is!
Post # 9
My mom went back to work a week after having me. Then again she also worked for my grandparents business so it wasn’t like a typical job where she was chained to her desk for 8-9 hours a day. It’s certainly not ideal but if you’re physically able to return to work so soon, you’d probably be able to make it work especially if your SO will be staying home. Putting a baby that young in daycare would be another story.
Post # 10
I had my daughter on a Sunday and went back to school (not laborous, but required walking) on Thursday. I was like a PP that my daughter was the NICU and wanted to save my time until she came home.
I think this completely depends on what type of work you are doing. If it is something where you are sitting 99% of the time you might be able to get by, but it would be rough.
Post # 11
Please give your body time to heal. This is just not a smart thing to TRY to do.
(I’m a mom of a 7 month old.)
Post # 12
Eeeek I cannot even imagine going back so soon. When I had DS I worked full time and was a single parent. I took 8 weeks off, I was able to collect disability for 6 weeks which was only 1/2 of my total paycheck and the rest I had saved up money threw out my pregnancy so I could manage. I was feel decent after about 2 weeks but in no way was I prepared mentally or physically for any type of work. I was SO exhausted for a long time because DS woke every 45 minutes sometimes every 30 minutes at night. He was very high needs and as a 3.5 year old is still very high needs. I think the earliest anyone should go back is 4 weeks but I really do think everyone should wait the full 6 weeks. It is also a very important time for Mom and baby to bond alot of emotional issues can occur later in life if that very important bonding doesn’t happen.
Post # 13
Your body needs to heal. And honestly, it all depends on the kind of delivery you have. You may be in labor for only 5 hours and squeeze that baby out super easily. Or, you might have 36 hours of mind-boggling pain and third degree tears in your vagina. You just never know!
If you are able to go back to work after a week or two, I don’t think breastfeeding would be an option and you would probably have to opt for formula (which there is no shame in doing). That baby will need to eat OFTEN (and I mean constantly) and trying to pump that much that soon would just be a nightmare.
Post # 14
We get a year here. It helps so much with breastfeeding rates and most people don’t want to go back early since there is a lot of bonding that happens in that first year.
There is no way I would miss out on mat leave. One of my friends is a hairstylist and he was sure she would be back in 6 weeks. She even took the whole year and only came back part time. Those babies grab those heart strings and pull hard. 😉
Hopefully by then, you can get a plan in place.
Post # 15
Thanks everyone! I have no idea what I’m getting myself into! So scary! I’m graduating from pharmacy school next year (I’ll be 27) and I’ll probably be working full time at a major chain hopefully in California…. but I’m not sure where I’ll end up. From what I’ve seen, women usually use their paid vacation time for 2 weeks then unpaid for a total of 4-12wks? The problem I’ve seen is that if you are gone for more than 3 weeks the company has to put someone else in your position and you lose your store. You have to float for a while until another position opens up. It’s a pretty strenuous on your feet all day type of job.
Post # 16
Honestly I think that’s rushing it. Your body needs time to recover. I don’t think you’ll have much luck with breastfeeding unless you’re able to pump regularly at work. And even then it would be challenging…