Post # 1
until birth. I am not having a baby shower because I live away from my hometown and traveling back just for that isn’t feasible. The in-laws and my parents keep asking if we know yet and we do, however we are thinking about keeping it a surprise for them until baby is born. Do you think that’s worth it or do you think we should just spill the beans now so they can go shopping for girl things?
Part of the reason why I want to keep it a surprise for them is because my mom in particular criticized me before for wanting to find out the sex of the baby at the ultrasound. She was all, “What?! No! It should be a surprise!” So now that we told her we still plan on finding out, she’s asking all the time if we know yet. If we do tell, we definitely don’t want anyone else (extended family or friends) to know until birth. So what do you think, to tell the grandparents to be or not?
Post # 3
I think it’s kind of a nice secret to keep between you two. It’s probably going to be hard to stay strong and quiet about it if they keep asking, but I think it would be pretty neat as a secret.
Post # 4
@hspw714: congrats on your baby girl!!! Are you going to making the nursery girly? And if you are will they see that? That might be the only issue b
Post # 5
Once you tell the grandparents I suspect that somehow others will find out. It’s gonna slip – or someone will see grandma buying pink, etc.
If you really want it to be a surprise, probably best to keep it just between you and your spouse.
Post # 6
It’s a sweet secret to have with your husband, but will you miss all the pink and girly gifts? It’s a silly reason to tell everyone, but I know I’d want lots of bows and frilly things for a little girl! Not lots of gender neutral gear. But totally a personal choice for you two to decide. Congrats btw! 🙂
Post # 7
I think it’s cute to keep it between the 2 of you BUT I think it might be easy to slip up and spill the beans. Accidentally saying “we’re going to shop for some baby clothes so she’ll have something to wear home from the hospital”. Just a tiny slip and the secret is out!! haha, But it would be great to have it to yourself however long it lasts 🙂 Congrats!!
Post # 8
It seems like a nice sweet secret to have, but once you tell them, I think it will get out. I’d do something cute like the box of balloons (with pictures when you open it to find pink balloons) or a pink cake that you cut and such. Then you could send the pictures to them to announce it!! If you wait until she’s born you don’t get to have that.
Post # 9
@wildflowerbee: 1+ i would totally accidently use “he/she” “his/her” i could never keep that kind of secret lol
Post # 10
DH and I are planning to find out but keep it a secret when the time comes. Going off of what @fridaythe13bride said, we actually really don’t want a bunch of super-gendered gifts. From a practical perspective, what if our second child is the opposite sex? We want to be able to reuse things. And from a personal perspective, we just really don’t like all that stuff – it kinda makes me gag how almost all girl stuff is pepto-pink and frilly, and all boy stuff is covered in trucks and sports stuff.
It may be really hard not to let it slip, but I think it’s a wonderful secret for the two of you to have to yourselves. Plus, makes the birth announcement that much more exciting for everyone else!
Post # 11
@hspw714: My sister and her husband found out and told no one. So you can do that if you want. No one, not even your mother, can expect you to tell. I would advise my sister’s approach: do not lie, but say: “We know, but we’re keeping it a secret”.
p.s. I didn’t even find out myself, so obviously told no one. But my sister and I were both gifted lots of gender appropriate clothing/blankets/etc after our respective babies were born anyway. So I don’t think guiding the gift givers is reason enough to tell people.
Post # 12
@hspw714: I think it is fun to not know! One of lifes last surprises you know? I will try to not know for my kids, but if temptation wins we will know but probably not tell any one else 🙂
Post # 13
@SadieBee: I was totally going to mention, it works both ways! If you want to skip the girly frills, then keeping it a secret is the best way to go 😉
Post # 14
I think it would be difficult to keep the secret once you know what it is… I had a hard enough time not telling for the 3 weeks that we did know before we had our gender reveal party!
That being said you can always keep it a secret as long as possible!! I feel like if you tell your parents it may get out. It is so easy to let a he or she slip when you are talking about the baby!
Post # 15
My husband and I found out at 20 weeks that we’re having a boy, and we’ve kept it a secret so far — I’m 31 weeks today. However, we are going to tell everyone at our joint shower/gender reveal party next Sunday. So it’s not a secret til birth, but it’s been a secret for a while. And I have to say, I’ve really enjoyed having this little secret just between us, and I DEFINITELY appreciate that all of the gifts we’ve gotten so far have been gender neutral.
I thought it would be hard to keep the secret until 40 weeks, and that’s why we decided to split the difference and tell everyone at our shower at 32 weeks. But now that the time has come to spill the beans, I’m realizing that it hasn’t been nearly as hard as I thougth it would be, and I’m kind of wishing we’d decided to just keep a secret til he’s here! But, oh well. i know it’s going to be a blast to see everyone’s reactions when we tell them it’s a boy. Everyone has had SUCH strong opinions in one direction or the other. So all of the team blue camp is going to be like, “WE KNEW IT!” and the team pink camp is going to be truly shocked.
Post # 16
If you want to keep it a secret, go for it. Personally, if I knew, I’d probably just tell people… There’s no bigger suprise than the announcing youre pregnant in the first place imo. I doubt anyone is dying of suspense like the parents would be if they were team green and waiting for birth to be surprised.