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I think this is VERY big of you! SERIOUSLY!!!! And when the right time comes...it will happen! 
@Wonderwoman217: Ok. Maybe instead of doing the girl thing and indirectly hinting "putting some of it aside towards getting married" you should actually tell him how you are feeling and ask him what his savings schedule is and why. Seriously. Communicate. Guys and subtle hints don't go together. And if you are steaming mad and horribly upset by the process, that means you guys need to TALK ABOUT IT. In direct, real terms. Not beat around the bush terms.
Whoa, way to keep your cool along with your dignity! I don't know if I could do that. I sure would be upset too. I hope he starts saving for that ring!!!!!!
Waiting a little longer so he could place that ring on my finger WITHOUT slapping it on a credit card and incurring a ton of interest fees feels really really good.
Making smart financial decisions as a couple is a good thing for both of you.
Hang in there! And keep your good attitude.
@crayfish: I concur. Have you two talked about getting married? I think the very very best thing to do any in waiting situation is let him know how you feel (that you want to get married eventually) and ask him how he feels and get a DEFINITE answer. Basically even if you're not at that point yet you need to know that you are heading in that direction.
Then if he feels the same way as you do ask him when he could see himself getting married. That at least gives you a time-table (and a reason not to keep asking about it). Then you have to wait. If that time passes and he's still spending money on frivelous things and claiming not to be able to afford a ring - then you have a serious sit-down because actions speak louder than words. But you have to be prepared to get an answer you don't like.
I really shouldn't be feeding this to you, but that seems like something my SO would say to keep me off the trail. Maybe he already got you a ring?! Ok I'll stop.
Good for you, I think I should take a break too. Goodluck!
Hmm... that's a toughie.
Guy won't get the hint to buy a ring if you say you want to save for marriage. Since there is no due date set for a wedding, he will be okay to save up for a marriage that will happen (in his mind) "eventually", and not (as in your mind) "anytime soon".
Go back and discuss this. Start with... "you know, I feel bad about the list I gave you. I am so sorry that I put the ring on it and it made me feel really awful that you had to say you cannot afford it. The truth really is that I would love to have any ring which you will give to me out of love. It does not have to expensive at all. It's true value for me will come through your sentiments attached to it. Just remember that next time you are out looking at rings."
Give or take a few words of course. 
Does your bf know how much your ideal ring costs? I found out after about 6 months of silent fuming that he was actually just paralyzed by the thought of the 3 months salary rule and kept pushing it to the back of his mind. We finally had a really frank conversation where I was able to tell him I didnt actually want a traditional e-ring and my DREAM ring was much less than he thought. Seriously, once I told him that, the ring was ordered within a month.
So if it seems like its the cost of the ring, and not that actual getting engaged part that is holding him back, my advice would be to have a frank, calm, rational conversation about the finances associated with the ring.
Rock on, girl! Credit cards aren't the way to go, and I think your heart's in the right place. I agree with some of the other ladies...sometimes subtle hints aren't the way to go. Just sit down with him and have an honest talk about it.
And props to your dude for being honest and telling you he doesn't have the money. That's better than a) getting you both into debt right now and b) fibbing and saying something else.
You two crazy kids will be fine :)
Ruh-roh, looks like I need to do a little filling in the blanks for some backstory. Ok, here goes: We have talked about getting married, and how we both feel, and that we are indeed on the same page (we have a 2 year old, for chrissakes, it'd be weird if we weren't on the same page, lol), it just seems I'm a few paragraphs ahead of him, heehee. I've posted about it before, but basically, after a little gentle prodding, I finall got out of him that he envisions us 'being married' in (his exact words) "a year or so." WTF?? Does that mean 12 months, 18 months, or 2 years? Silly boys, and their perception of time. I didn't push him for specifics after that, 'cause I didn't want him to feel interrogated.
As far as him having a 'saving schedule/plan', he's not the saver type. He sees something he wants and buys it. If he can afford it, that is. If he can't afford it, he waits until he can. That's just who he is. I've never seen him make payments on any big purchases, or small ones either, in the entire time we've been together. (Except car payments, etc, but that's different) Again, that's just him, and I can't expect him to change that.
Little more backstory on the tv purchase. It was actually a misunderstanding. We joke around sometimes and say, "Man, I need a whole new wardrobe. Let's go to the mall." Or, "We need a new couch. Screw it, let's get a whole new living room suit." And then the other will reply, "okay, we'll go right now." Hahaha. So, when he was looking at tvs online, and said, "Heck, I'll buy this one right now.", I of course, thought he was joking as usual and said, "ok, go for it." He wasn't joking. And he didn't realize that I thought he was joking. So when I told him to go for it, he assumed I was being serious. Needless to say, when he started to print the invoice, I hit the roof, and told him he better 'un-buy' it. He couldn't, or he would have.
As for an ideal ring, I don't want to be involved unless he wants me to be. I would rather be surprised by what he picks on his own. He alluded to a dollar amount, but it's not much more than what I had imagined he'd spend anyway, so we're at least on the same page and paragraph on that one, lol.
Wow I admire your willpower lol! You seem to have everything under control (even when the going gets tough), good for you :)
Good job keeping your cool! You never know, it may come sooner than expected. I hope it does. Nothing wrong with taking a break from the boards. :) It alwys help to refresh!
You may have to continue to wait and see because he is not clear on what he wants to do just yet. When me and my husband got married we went to the courthouse and a year later this past weekend we had our wedding. We don't have any kids but he is military. I don't know if you would consider this while you save the money up for a wedding or not. I wish you well.
Just have to say that you're a much stronger person than me! When my bf said something similar a while back a started crying and tried to hide it by doing dishes... bad idea because my bf knows that I only wash dishes by hand when I'm really upset lol. He saw how frustrated and sad I was at the fact that we wouldn't be married for a while, but then he explained why he needed to wait (wants to finish school first, get his financial stuff straightened out, and all these other really realistic and logical reasons to wait). It doesn't make waiting any easier, but he does have a few dang good reasons to wait, and I keep reminding myself that this guy really wants to do it right.
I understand how you feel about the whole can't-afford-it-now-but-buys-a-fancy-new-electronic-man-toy-anyways situation... my guy keeps saying how he needs to pay off some credit card bills and then comes home with a 42" HD flatscreen tv??? WTF! Makes me think he secretly has money stashed away somewhere and maybe a ring too tee hee!
I just have to put some perspective that I've experienced in on this. It may or may not apply to your situation, but here it goes: I knew pretty much from the start that I was going to marry my husband, and to be fair, I'm pretty sure he knew and felt the same way about me from nearly the start! We were talking about marriage within 2 months of meeting each other.
However, with all of this promising talk, and him treating me AS A WIFE, it still took him 8 more months to propose. He knew he was going to marry me and he knew that all he really wanted was to spend the rest of his life with me, but something about proposing scared the bejesus out of him. He just had a hang up about all the what ifs.
We'd had a long conversation the night before he proposed in which he really truely WASN"T ready. I wanted him to WANT to ask me, so while we talked about it to figure out the why's, I was totally accepting of the fact that he wasn't ready yet. I didn't want a pity proposal or a have-to proposal. I figured that it would be 5+ months before he did propose, because I was flying home to the US 2 days later and it would be 4 months before we saw each other in person again.
However, something in that conversation and the resultant introspection and talks with his parents changed something in him. He surprised both himself and me by proposing the next night! There was and has been no doubts that he meant that proposal with every fiber of his being and once he DID propose, it was like this HUGE weight was lifted off.
I guess my long winded point is to be patient. Waiting SUCKS! Trust me I had a long not fun wait myself and being 6k miles apart through much of that just makes it suck that much more.... but when it happens and it happens from the heart, it's just so amazingly worth the wait!
Definitely talk to him and let him know that it ISN"T about the ring, but about your life together, maybe that's his hangup, maybe not. Communication though is soooo essential!
Best of luck to you and to all the waiting bees!
If I'm reading this right, you guys are both on the same page about marriage, you just have different timelines?
I think direct communication is the only way to go here. You're right to not get into it when you're feeling super emotional about it.
I believe direct negotiation is in order here. It's not like you guys are miles apart as to what you want, it sounds like it's a matter of time frames.
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So, the other day I showed BF my wish list that he had sorta asked for (see here for details) He laughed at all the silly stuff, and kinda said 'yeah, okay' type remarks to all the normal stuff, but then when he got to the sparkly pics, he said, "And I'd love to get you a ring baby, but I just can't afford it right now." --my heart sank, and I think I died a little inside, but I kept my poker face on--So then I laughingly and sarcastically said, "Well, what about the sports car? That's doable, right?" lol
Anyway, I got really sad and moped around for the next 24 hours. Sadness turned into anger and resentment, really fast. I was fuming, and felt guilty for being selfish, but then again, why shouldn't I be selfish? This is my/our happiness we're talking about, and I have every right to have some say so in it! I was torn for a while, wanting to say to him something along the lines of, "So, what, the brand new TV that you bought a few months back is good enough to put on the credit card, but I'M not good enough for you to buy a ring on the credit card?!?!?" Buuuut, I did NOT say that, even though that's how I felt. Thank God, I distracted myself with enough things/activities/errands that I mellowed out so I didn't have the urge to say that anymore. Adding to the sadness and frustration is realizing the fact that something as stupid as finances (or lack thereof) is holding us back. It blows.
So instead, after alot of careful thought, I've decided on two things. First, that I'm going to say this to him: "Baby, can you make me a promise? When we get our tax refund this coming year, can we put aside some of it, and put it towards getting married?" I don't intend to use the words 'ring', 'propose', or 'wedding', but simply 'getting married.' (Hopefully emphasizing that what I want the most is the commitment, and I'm not after a huge rock or ridiculously big party) The second thing I've decided on is that I'm gonna take a break from the blog and all the other wedding related sections on the Bee, and just restrict myself to the waiting boards. It's just so much torture reading all the posts about planning and all the proposal stories. So don't be surprised, ladies, if it seems like my posts/replies are less frequent than normal. I'm not gone, just taking a breather, and seriously cutting back on my Wedding Bee obsession, lol!
Of course, I love feedback from the hive, so give it to me straight, girls! Lemme have it, lol!