Weddingbee boards

I've browsed the boards before but never took the time to post.  But today I just need to get this off my chest. This morning I get a call from my fiance about my younger brother posting on my FB wall about how upset he was with me that I was talking behind his back and we were through, that I had degraded myself and our mother would be ahsamed (she has been gone 10 years).  I was confused, I hadn't been discussing him at all.

I log on see the nasty post for myself and see I have a FB message, before I checked it my brother-in-law who is married to my younger sister calls me and I ask him what was going on.  come to find out my sisters friend had told my sister about my private blog where I vent anon, discuss my mental illness, and generally unwind.  She had been reading it for months and had never come to me to offer any support even though she knew I was struggling with suicidal urges, my eating disorder and self-harm, honestly I was stunned and upset.  He said I had posted some thoughts over my brothers new marriage and my sisters as well the previous night.  There it was, the reason they were upset...

I had discussed my brothers shot gun wedding and the fact he had only proposed after a second girlfriend had confronted the first.  I had touched upon my brother-in-laws flirting.  I did not name names, I didn't even give details just venting because of the way my siblings had been treating me over the past year (blatant exclusions from everything, ignored messages, ect).  I never expected them to read any of it and I most certainly never intended to hurt them.  It was my own ignorance ever allowing the friend to follow me even after promising eachothers blogs stayed private, and my own stupidity venting about something so personal.

The facebook message turned out to be a message from my sister also declaring that she could no longer handle "walking on eggshells" around me and was hurt by my actions so no longer wanted to be part of my life.  She wasn't in the first place because she blew me off constantly! I explained to her that this was in no way aiming to hurt her because the blog was private for a reason and I didn't understand her feelings toward me since we never see each other, that I hoped she could forgive me for saying such personal things,

I know they're hurt by my (true) observations and the only thing I apolgoze for is venting somewhere where someone I know could read it, complete stupidity on my part.  I honestly have been dealing with their snubs for over two years and I myself was ready to cut the ties on the poisonous relationship we had. 

I suppose the main point to this vent is now I feel like the wedding that I was planning is darkened and strained, I knew I wasn't going to include either of them because neither showed any interest but now I'm going to have to deal with "where is your sister? What did you do? what was said? why was your brother so mad?"   Not that I wasn't struggling enough...

I think your sister's friend has nothing better to do but focus on what your doing/saying. It's a blog, yes it should have been private if you just intended on venting but still..it's YOUR blog!
Just stay strong and focus on your wedding plans. If you say your relationship with your sister and brother had already been suffering, then don't worry about the questions people have at your wedding.
I hope everything works out the way you want it to. Good Luck and remember wedding planning is supposed to be one of the happiest times! :)

Thank you all for the support, I'm trying to remember I'm working on my own family right now and their issues shouldn't make my life or wedding planning harder.  I already have enough to worry about.

Yes it really hurts that they can ignore the other issues, read the things I'm struggling with but the minute its about them they find it ok to confront me.  I tried to reach out to them but it seems they just were "curious" not helpful.  It makes me feel sick knowing she saw how I contemplated ending my life and she stood by and did nothing.

  My sister is 23 and my brother is almost 20. 

The friend knew about it because he also had a blog that he used for his frustrations (we followed eachother), I could be shallow and let his family know what he writes about them since he seems to enjoy doing it to me. lI hope he is thankful I'm not the same sort that would do that... Since I keep my promises and I promised to keep his a secret.

I did apologize for hurting their feelings with my observations but I will not apologize for writing my thoughts in what I thought was a safe and supportful place.  I won't write in a diary because my blog is a haven (I'm sure all of you out there who blog can understand how great it is to have support) where I can vent and recieve input from likeminded people.

I've tried to heal our relationship, we've had a lot of issues since our childhood.  They both used to and I'm sure still do blame me for destroying our family by reporting our father for the sexual abuse I endured, and I know it was hard for them to understand my mental illness.  the last few months I've wondered though if it was worth it to keep trying when they do not seem to care whether I was there or not, this blow up just signified to me they were looking for that one reason to stop communicating at all with me.

and as for the FB posting I haven't seen any updates apear on my profile but I'm being extra careful to make sure the pages do not link, thank you :)