- 4 years ago
Uber long post, sorry…
This is my second pregnancy. It doesn’t really feel like it though coz It’s been 6 years since the first time I gave birth. With my first pregnancy, everything was great and low-risk. I was young (21) and didn’t really know about all my options at the time.. I just trusted my doctor. Anyway, my water broke at 38w3d on Easter Sunday of 2007. I go to a practice of about 4 doctors and they take turns being on call during holidays and the weekend. Well, the one on-call that day wasn’t my OB. I was fine with this. The doctor that was on-call was even more experienced! She actually delivered my OB’s baby!
Now this is all very blurry so I’ll try to recap my birth story as best as I can. So at the hospital, they pretty much hooked me up to an IV.. had me lie down.. and I think after a couple of hours gave me pitocin. What the heck did I know? I thought it was standard practice. So yeah, then my contractions got really painful. I didn’t have any plans to ask for an epidural when I came in but it got so painful, I asked for one. It was welcome relief..
So guess what happens next? A little bit after the monitors started beeping. Doctor and nurses rushed in my room. My baby was in distress. They had me change positions which was difficult being all numb from the epi.. Baby was still “in distress”. Doctor comes in again and tells me because of this, it’d be the safest course to give me an emergency c-section. I always knew this was a possibility so I was nervous, but okay with it. I was just worried.
Everything happened so fast and I swear from about the time she said c-section, 20 minutes later, I heard my baby’s cry. Other than my blood pressure dropping a little bit after causing me to throw up, everything else was good. I was a bit constipated when I got home but I recovered really fast. I actually started driving within the week.
I sometimes wonder how it would’ve been handled if it was my OB on call that day. Would she have made the same decisions?
Fast forward to current time, 6 years later. I love my OB and continued to see her for my annual exams. She helped me TTC by prescribing me metformin for my PCOS and if I hadn’t gotten pregnant by the 1 year mark, she already had a prescription ready for me for my first round of clomid. Well, I was lucky to get pregnant right before the 1 year mark and when I found out, I naturally knew I was gonna see her again.
Well, during one of my first few appointments, she kind of implied that it would be a scheduled c-section for me. That it would be the safer thing and that the risk of a VBAC wasn’t worth it. I was just so happy to be pregnant after trying for almost a year that I didn’t really say anything. I just smiled and nodded.
Well, I’m 17 weeks tomorrow and have been reading up on a lot of things. I’m so torn. Part of me doesn’t mind another C-section and part of me wants to experience a vaginal birth. Though I’m a bit turned off by her suggestion of another c-section, I know that if I talk to her, she’ll discuss it with me. I don’t even really remember how everything happened with the first one. Like how dilated I was etc. I already looked it up and the hospital I plan on going to does not have a ban on VBACs so I know it’s a possiblity.
I might even change my mind later on and realize I really do want a scheduled c-section but just not even having the option of VBAC is bugging the heck out of me.
I really love my doctor and I know to some of you that read this, you’re probably wondering why. It’s hard to explain.. I don’t wanna go to another doctor. I don’t.
I’m also worried that if I talk to her about a VBAC and she agrees then we attempt it, that something goes wrong and something happens to the baby. I will never forgive myself.
What should I do? Have any of you ever considered a VBAC? Was your doctor supportive or hesitant? What ended up happening?