(Closed) NOW HIRING: Personal decision maker

posted 8 years ago in Beehive
  • poll: What should we do?
    Small destination wedding - people aren't so bad! : (14 votes)
    78 %
    Elope! People suck and make everything difficult! : (2 votes)
    11 %
    Neither! You are way too crazy to get married! : (1 votes)
    6 %
    Other: I will offer my fabulous insight below : (1 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    58 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I know how you feel about having trouble making decisions!! Wedding planning has been really hard for me because I deliberate about the smallest (and biggest) details for way too long! Yet it’s slightly easier to give other people advice about what decisions they should make =)

    I think Option #1 sounds better. As you said, you have more cons for #2, and you’ll be able to have a meaningful ceremony by having your grandmother there, and have fun by being about to bake and make DIY stuff. As for the friends drinking too much, maybe you could just not have that much alcohol at your house? I know you’re concerned about people having fun, but it’s not about them, it’s about you and your FI! And you don’t want to be chaperoning others on your big day! For my wedding, I’m only offering free alcohol for the coctail hour, then switching to a cash bar for the reception. I mainly did this for cost reasons but it’s becoming more common not to have an open bar for the whole event, or to just limit alcohol to wine and/or beer.

    Good luck making the decision!

    Post # 4
    10851 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    What if you guys elope, do your vows far far away, but then have a surprise reception (or not surprise) when you get back? Balance of not crazy people, but then crazy people only you’re not worried about them ruining your day. AND you’ll still get to make tons of baked goods, which I totally understand, is an amazing thing.

    Post # 5
    2889 posts
    Sugar bee

    I think the decision is clear, go for option number one and have a small wedding/dessert party. It sounds like you would enjoy that. The biggest con I see is the overdrinking. I would do what PP suggested and only stock so much alcohol. Stick to beer and wine and don’t over buy so that when it is out it’S out. OR pre-mix drinks (i.e. lemonade with vodka, sangria, rum punch with fresh fruit) and make them light. Just tell people you made them so well they can’t taste the alcohol, they will enjoy the drinks and (hopefully) not get too drunk.

    Post # 6
    7975 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    Yeah, the decision seems pretty clear to me – mini destination with limited alcohol!

    Post # 7
    190 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I think option #1 meets the family obligations enough. Plus if it’s that stressful, you’ll have six months far away from your family & puking friends to recover! By the time you get home, the stressful parts will have faded and the good memories will remain.

    Post # 9
    4001 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I have to go with the first choice.  It sounds to me like the ‘lesser of both evils’, so to speak.  I just think the con’s are easier to manage.  First off, your friends might surprise you, my Fiance and I have some friends that don’t know how to control themselves, but at weddings, they’ve been fine.  So, it could work out really well!  And people will have fun at your wedding, if you guys are having fun.  So don’t worry about them, just have a blast and they’ll follow!  And just understand that you can’t please everyone, so the family drama might still happen, its part of the process for a lot of us.  At least your Nana would be there 🙂

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