Post # 1
Some of you might remember a thread I started with with crazy stories about people’s RSVPs and guests and such. ( http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/share-your-awkward-rsvpself-invite-moments#axzz2WnKR5xbq). there was one woman who invited herself and her husband to my wedding by booking a room in our room block. We ended up formally inviting her to avoid an awkward situation and because my fiancé decided that he actually wanted to invite them.
Fast forward, I just got the RSVP back in the mail with a note written from the wife “husband will be out of town so I’ll be bringing a friend”. Ok. You’ve got to be freakin kidding me! The invite was addressed to you and YOUR HUSBAND. Not you and some random plus one we don’t even know. You were only invited in the first place out of a sense of obligation. You have just gone too Far. This is not ok. You’ve caused me enough stress to begin with when you booked your room uninvited, and now you are bucking all sense of etiquette and more importantly COMMON SENSE by TELLING ME you are bringing a random friend with you since your husband can’t make it? No way.
Also, she will know other people at the wedding. We have mutual friends so there is no worry about her feeling out of place. she also lives really close to the venue. some guests are traveling almost across the country. In that case, I would understand maybe wanting a plus one, but she is coming from just a few towns over. Luckily, my fiancé was entirely on the same page with me. At first I thought he might just want to let it go to avoid drama, but he totally agreed that she was way out of line. He is not looking forward to having to confront her, but he stepped up to the plate and he will do what he has to do. I am annoyed now that this woman has caused so many issues through her lack of common sense and consideration. First by having to have her rebook into a different room after she booked one without being invited, and now by making my fiancé have to have this awkward conversation with her because she took it upon herself to invite a random friend to our wedding.
I guess we’ll see what happens after my fiancé calls her!
Post # 3
I would be annoyed too, especially if she knows people there.
Post # 5
What is everyone’s problem with who someone brings to a wedding? If you invite a woman and her husband, yet her husband can’t make it, why can’t she bring someone else?
I mean…really. You are being unreasonable.
Post # 6
@SkyChick: wow she sounds clueless. I had read your previous thread and couldn’t believe the nerve of her! Glad your FI is stepping up and saying something – you don’t want random friends of friends at your wedding! Let us know what happens!!!
Post # 7
Invitations are non-transferrable, and I get your frustration: what if there was a cousin you wanted to invite that didnt make the first cut, but now that a slot has opened up you can?
Post # 8
@MissFemmeFatale: You know me: I’m pretty blah about everything…but I think the frustration with this, for me, would be that I don’t know this friend, and I could be inviting someone I *do* know in that persons place that maybe I couldnt have afforded before.
Post # 9
@SkyChick: Holy dear… that lady is soooo rude! I would be so upset! We’re going to a wedding in August and we are staying with relatives an hour from the place so as not to use up the room block that we thought should be saved for relatives etc. What a crazy lady!
Post # 10
@SkyChick: wow, that’s bold and rude. i have heard it all now.
i won’t be surprised if your next update says that she can’t make it either so she gave the invite to the lady that does her nails and her 6 kids.
Post # 11
@MissFemmeFatale: disagree completely. Number one, this guest’s random plus one would be intruding on a very personal event. Number two, that rando guest is taking up already tight space instead of someone else the B&G might actually want there. It was gracious enough that they extended an invite to this uber rude couple in the first place-no way would I stand for her bringing some stranger to my wedding.
Post # 12
She didn’t want to invite the guest in the first place. The groom wanted to. If it was so “personal” she wouldn’t have made that decision to begin with.
I don’t think them booking a room was rude. I think they made a simple mistake without thinking, assuming they would be invited.
I think what the OP is doing is rude now. There is no sense in this confrontation.
Post # 13
@MissFemmeFatale: It’s rude to assume you’re invited to anything, especially someone’s wedding. And I seriously doubt it was an innocent oversight on the guest’s part to book a room before recieving an invite. We’ve all seen here on the Bee how awful and presumptive people can be when they think they’re deserving of a wedding invite, whether they were meant to get one or not.
Post # 14
@TattedNYBride: I believe in order for someone to be “rude” it has to be intentional.
The way I see it, they made this mistake they are unaware of because they were in fact invited to the wedding. He can’t go, so she wants to bring her friend. I wouldn’t attend a wedding stag even if I did know a handful of people there. It would make me uncomfortable.
Now she wants to confront the woman, who up to this point doesn’t realize any of what she has done is rude, and I feel sorry for her. It is going to do nothing but embarass her.
That is rude imo.
Post # 15
@SkyChick: thats soooo rude and id be really annoyed!!!!! annoyed that technically they invited themselves in the first place, and to bring someone u dont even know to share your special day with is just soooo rude!
Post # 16
It is so annoying people think they can do that! My fiances mom keeps letting her friends add a guest or a date we didnt invite! She is not paying! Dont spend out burdget without permission!!