- 4 years ago
- Wedding: June 2014
I know most of you will read this and feel like this is petty. But it really annoys me that I’ve gotten myself into this pickle when no one else has to pack up and bring their house or kitchen. I’m all for being a family and doing the family thing, it’s just I feel like this has gone too far and I don’t know how to make it stop.
My extended family and I get together 4 times a year and have dinner at each other’s houses outside of normal holidays.
Before I was seriously involved, I would pack my Honda to the brim with the stuff that the other houses didn’t have that were needed for dinner: 6 ft tables, 6-8 chairs, bicycles/toys for my nephews, cooking supplies that my mom needed, etc. My car basically looked like a kid moving into college as I traveled sometimes up to 4 hours away by highway from my home passing through multiple states.
When I got seriously involved with my fiancé and now engaged, I stopped wanting to be the family Sherpa. My fiancé made some good points: 1) You could be stopped by the police for traveling with the car so packed, 2) You could break out one of your car windows if the stuff shifted, and 3) God forbid, if you’re in an accident, you could easily be impaled by a chair leg among other things.
With my immediate family about an hour away, a simple no sufficed and they now pick up the chairs from my house and return them. With my extended cousins who are 2 hours away, it took me not showing up a couple of times and eventually they got the hint to make other plans for tables and chairs. But my aunt and uncle who are 4 hours away just don’t seem to understand the concept.
I got this email from my aunt, yesterday:
Subject: Pack me on the bus!!!
Talked with your Mom today and I realized that I need to ask to use 5 chairs and a table to be brought to the Dinner on Saturday. If you do not have room, we will be forced to have some uninvited guests crawling on us and the ceiling like before. Seriously, I would like to borrow some chairs and a table.
Thank you; looking forward to seeing y’all soon. Be safe.
The last time she’s talking about. She had planned to rent chairs but found them to be too expensive so she used her outdoor furniture inside the house.
I’ve tried explaining tackfully. And I’m trying not to be rude out of respect for them. But I’m at my wits end.
Even though I don’t have the money, as we’re trying to save for our weddding, I’m considering buying a set of table and chairs for them to use as well as their kids (my cousins) who are 2 hours away. But the issue is that they are the type to say they don’t have space in their home for it and it doesn’t fit with their decor.