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DH gets home earlier than I do most days and will check the mail and open EVERYTHING, regardless of whether it's addressed to me, him or both. It kind of makes me crazy to come home and have all my bills already open.
So bees, is eachother's mail fair game in your house?
Honestly, he's lazy, and if I didn't open his mail, it'd never get opened (and then things would start to happen like his grandmother would call me upset that he didn't respond to her letter). I voted that we open each other's mail, although he doesn't really open mine, but not because he would have any issue doing it (nor would I have any issue with him doing it), because he wouldn't, and he's done it before, but the guy is generally too lazy to open HIS OWN mail, let alone mine, so it's rare it actually happens.
Dh is out of town alot, if I didn't go throught the mail then the bills would not get paid. We do leave things that appear to be personal letters or cards for eachother, unless he is out of town, but I always ask him first with those.
Gotta say, being a postal employee it is now allowed in our house. the first time he opened a piece of mail addressed to me I was not happy. Afterall, it is a felony! And just by my attitude he now knows not to open my mail. I get the mail anyway since I am the one with the key, but like FutureMrsMcK's FI, he hardly opens his own mail unless I am standing right there. One week, he was waiting for a package and asked for the key, needless to say as soon as he got the package I took the key back, because not only did he not open his mail, but he didn't even give me mine. So aggrivating!
no. hubby is happy for me to open his but i rarely do, usually only because he specifically tells me to but he never ever opens my mail. i have nothing to hide, i often open it right in front of him but i think its a very personal thing
he doesn't open mine because he doesn't even open his own lol... normally i do that part, bills, cleaning type of thing.
Never, ever, ever, ever.
Why would I open something not addressed to me? Hubs agrees with this also.
Legal bee speaking here: it's a federal offense to open someone else's mail. That said, I ask permission first. :)
Nope. Not unless it has both of our names on it.
I open mine, he opens his.
oh and another reason why i dont open hubbys mail - all the bills are in his name and there is no fun in that! ignorance is bliss as they say :)
I'll do it if he's away for an extended period and I see something I think may be super important, but I always call and ask first!
Fi doesnt check the mail and when i tell him he has mail he doesnt open it anyways. All the bills are in his name and im in charge of paying them so if i dont open them i dont know who i have to pay what... But if he were to get a personal letter (He never has even his family addresses invites and everything to me lol) i would let him open it!
I open all the mail. I actually think its fun, and I pick it up every day (its at the end of the road.) He doesnt open mine because he knows he would forget to tell me what it was or where it is. lol
Packages are a no touch zone. We do most our shopping online, and both of us think of it like Christmas! Okay, so last time it was a car part, but its still fun to open.
I think it's priavte - we don't open each others mail but sometimes we do it by accident. It's no biggie, we share everything and have nothing to hide.
i guess i don't understand why it's a big deal. obviously it's a felony without permission, but I don't see anything wrong with spouses giving each other blanket permission to open each other's mail.
aren't they his bills too?
at least that's the way we've been doing things. my bills= his bills and vice versa, so why would I care if he opened them?
i agree though with the pp who said that if my husband got what appeared to be a personal letter at home, I would probably leave the fun of it for him to experience.
Usually I open the fun things (cards, invites, etc) and he opens the bills, doesn't matter who they're addressed to.
I usually have to, since he is gone March-September. When he is home, I open all the bills since they are all joint, but other than that, I usually just hand his to him. It's definitely not a big deal, he would probably be much happier if I just opened everything. Nothing private here!
On;y fpr two reasons. 1) Becuse he asks me too, if he is out of town, 2) I open up the World Vision mail, as we sponser a child, but it's under his name specifially for some reason, so I open that up to keep up with his progress because I get so excited, and can't wait til he gets home. But thats it.
If it's something that he gets that I know is junk mail, I usually open it to double check, then shred it, otherwise he lets it pile up on his nightstand into this mountain of mess. but all of his bills and personal mail, I just hand them to him. He wouldn't mind if I did open them, but I'd rather give him a sense of privacy for those things, even though, if I asked, he would show any of it to me.
Likewise, he does the same for me.
Being that FI is deployed, I open everything.
If he was home, I wouldn't open personal mail, just bills. Mind you... he usually just tells me to open something personal anyways if it's addressed to him.
My stuff he doesn't open, but out of laziness, not because he isn't allow.
Being given Power of Attorney, and him having to do a will recently kind of took the barriers down in every single aspect of stuff like mail, bank accounts, etc.
I take care of the mail, because if left up to him, he wouldn't open any of of his!
My fiance NEVER opens his mail, so I open everything and stack things that are his responsibility on his desk chair so he has to look at it before he can sit down...lol
If it's the phone bill which is addressed to him but we are both on the account, I open it.
If it's a white envelope with just his name on it and it smells of perfume and has a lipstick kiss on the back, I sure as hell open it! LOL...just kidding.
But that did happen once and he opened it in front of me. Turns out it was an ex sending him his resume out of the "goodness of her heart" because she updated it for him. No lipstick kiss, though. lol
I never open his mail. He usually gets bills which I am not interested to see anyway. Lol! 
If there was ever a mail that I was highly suspicious about then yes I would probably open it. 
If he gets stuff during holidays like cards, then I ask permission before opening it.
I'm also in the camp that opens all of the mail. My husband rarely checks the mail, and even more rarely opens anything unless he thinks it looks like something fun. I handle all our finances and paperwork, so he has no real reason to open the mail.
sometimes. it depends. we have so much stuff together, technology-wise. sometimes i will tell him to get an email out of my inbox on the iPad and forward it to me, or his mom might have sent me somethng i want him to read, so i tell him to go into my email and vice versa. we don't have secrets or anything to hide, so it's not a big deal. i would never go through his emails just arbitrarily though, as in, to SNOOP. i'm sure he feels the same. even if he did, i wouldn't care!
We both open each others mail (although I do more mail opening than him usually). All bills and expenses and such are both of ours, even if only one name is on the envelope. Plus, he is out of town for half the week each week so it would pile up if I just left it for him.
That said, we do leave personal cards/letters/etc alone.
I open ALL the mail because as a lot PP's said he never even opens his.
Depends what it is. DH works out of town so he's gone 25 days at a time.
If I know it's one of our regular bills, I open it. Otherwise I just leave it unless he's expecting something. Or if a mystery envelope comes without a return address, I'll open it for him just in case it's urgent.
When he's home, he never opens my mail unless I tell him to.
For the most part, I open all the mail. I am the one that takes care of the bills (his and mine) so it just makes sense to do it that way. If he happens to think to check the mail, he usually opens it though.
I open all the mail. DH has a habit of tossing it on the computer table and it gets lost until I open it and take care of it (property taxes, car tax, registrations, hospital and preschool info CAN NOT GET LOST!)
Whether or not it's my name or his name, it doesn't matter. Stuff has to be opened.
The only thing we won't open of each other's is a package someone has ordered.
Absolutely not!
The only instance that I could see is we have mutual bills and it just happens to come addressed to only one of of us. OTher than that. my mail, my business. His mail, his business. Thats not to say we don't share knwoledge of each others debt levels but open up each others mail is not gonna fly in our household. I'm not gonna police him opening his mail or not either. He knows whats in there, if he doesn't want to look at it, no skin off of my back. (obviously thats if its personal thing and not some mortage or mutual bill)
I'm more organized, so bill paying is my job. I keep spread sheets and records of when each thing is sent, how much it was, due date, etc..
I open pretty much everything, but if it's a personal card or a package, I leave it for him.
People think its weird, but we open eachothers mail. Mostly I open his but if hes in the mood to get the mail he opens mine. We don't open eachothers packages or things that are clearly cards/gifts or something we ordered online.
I can see why people think its weird, possibly an invasion of privacy, but its not to us.
I open everything, unless I think it's something he would rather open (a bday card, package, or something that looks personal). If he didn't open his mail it would never get opened. We are very open in this way though. We have all joint accounts and I pay all the bills. It works for us.
Wow, I'm surprised by the results of this poll! I figured almost everyone would say no.
We never open each other's mail, not that we have anything to hide, but--it's just a boundary issue. I think I would go nuts if he opened my mail. I'd feel like I'd completely lost my independence at that point, if that doesn't sound overly dramatic. :0) Seriously, I just would never even think of it, unless he specifically needed me to open something for him.
No - we open our own, individually. I think one time, he got something, and I couldn't wait til he got home - but I called him to ask if I could open it...
depends what it is. If we are waiting for something or its an invite I will or he will, but otherwise I could care less about his bank statements etc that come in the mail. I will throw out the CC pre-approvals though. He never sees those. Its not that he is not allowed, I just know he doesnt want them.
Yeah, we do but normally we ask first. Like is he's off during the week and gets the mail he will text me if I got something odd looking and I'll just tell him to open it.
Not a big deal to us. We don't hide anything at all...he has my passwords and I have his for everything, we open each others mail...nothing is a mystery with us.
If one of us got a personal letter then probably not but ultimately it's a what's mine is his and his is mine kinda home. I couldn't imagine not being that integrated with each other.
I am the one that takes care of paying the bills and I'm home during the day so generally I open everything but it really doesn't matter either way.
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