Post # 1
I don’t have a relationship with my biological father. He was an alcoholic when I was younger (probably still is, who knows) so my mom and I left him and moved closer to the rest of our family. It’s been almost 15 years since I’ve seen him and he’s only contacted me about a dozen times. Whenever he calls it’s always about money, I don’t even think he cares about how I’m doing (doubt he even knows I’m getting married in 6 months).
Well, tonight I got a phone call from him. I didn’t recognize the number so I let it go to voicemail. His vmail said that he’s been trying to get in touch with my mother and I because there’s problem with my grandmother and he wanted to let us know. I instantly assumed that my grandmother died. He said there was a problem with her and he wanted to let us know so what else could it be? Well, I call my mom and my aunt pretty hysterical. My mom tells me that she’ll call him and get the scoop. She calls me back and tells me that grandma’s doing great and that he just wants money, AGAIN.
(Pardon the caps but I just need to scream this…) YOU CALL YOUR DAUGHTER AND MAKE IT SEEM LIKE HER GRANDMOTHER DIED AND YOU JUST WANT MONEY. ARE YOU F’ING KIDDING ME?!?
I’m so angry. I realize that he didn’t come out and say that something happened to her but his tone and the way he worded the voicemail had me convinced that she died. This happened like an hour ago and I’m still shaking, I’m so pissed. I wish I had it in me to call him and let him know I feel but I’m sure that would just turn into a big sobbing mess. When I get really upset, I hyperventilate so I’m sure that would be tons of fun.
Not really sure why I posted this, just needed to get it out I guess. Thanks for listening (err, reading).
Post # 3
Sometimes family can be really shitty. I have an uncle who does this all the time to my mom. She just stopped responding and he’s slowly making his way through the rest of the family now.
I feel for you and hope you feel better 🙁
Post # 4
OMG..what a jerk!!! I think you should give him a piece of your mind once you calm down a bit!
Post # 5
Ugh, I don’t talk to my biological dad either so I know how emotionaly taxing it can be to get a call out of the blue from him. When my grandfather (who I was incredibly close to) had a stroke he didn’t call me until the NEXT day. Anyway, I know what you’re going through…I hope you start feeling better soon…
Post # 6
Oh… my…. god. That is a truly despicable thing to do to someone. I’m so sorry.
I would have called him and let him have it, but I’m a loud-mouth. 🙂
Post # 7
That’s pretty crappy that he would intentionally illicit such feelings from you with an implied “your grandma is in trouble” tone, all for money. I’m so sorry. It seems this is just his way. Breathe. Go for a short brisk walk or drive around the block. Get out of the house and when you return, you will have greatly dispelled the frustration of that experience. Deep, calm breaths…
Post # 8
Can you and your mom change numbers so he can’t contact you? Would you want to do that. I would tell him not to contact you unless it’s something serious and nothing to do with money.
Post # 9
What an ass hole!! Im sorry he did that to you..kinda sad what alcoholics will do for money!
Post # 11
I’m so sorry, that’s horrible of him to do. I don’t speak with my father either, and I know how much you’d love to yell at him, but maybe I’d do like some other bees said and just go for a walk, angry-clean your house, whatever gets you busy. Just do something to keep you occupied, and try to let it go without contacting him. If he doesn’t know that it affected your or bothered you, he doesn’t get additional contact from you (and another chance to play on your emotions). Sorry again, I sure hope you feel better soon.
Post # 12
I would be livid too 🙁 What a horrible way for someone to behave to you. *hugs*
Post # 13
oh my gosh, that is horrible 🙁 I’m so sorry *hugs*
Post # 14
I an so sorry cait, I can only send you (((((HUGS))))) and positive thought.
Post # 15
Thanks guys! You’ve definitely made me feel better. I’ve calmed down. I think the massive bowl of chocolate ice cream really helped.
He’s still an asshole but now I just kinda feel bad for him. He’s 56 years old and the only time in his life that he’s not lived with my grandparents was for the 15 or so years that my parents were dating and married. Pathetic!
Post # 16
I am so sorry. That is absolutely terrible. I can’t believe that he did that. I can’t even imagine….