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No, you can't. Think of it this way. Three hours a day, in a car. Plus the amount of gas (for at least 200 miles). DH and I lived 90 minutes apart for 3 years, and even just driving there and back on the weekends became rough.
I would look to getting a place there, or perhaps subleasing. Usually plenty of places open up for the summer.
I commute 45 minutes to school and my gas bill is through the roof and I have actually skipped class a few days simply because I dreaded the drive. I would NOT reccomend that commute at all!
I would look into renting a room from someone. The gas prices will eat you alive, let alone the wear and tear on your car - and sanity!!
afbacher Yeah. I think I might look into getting a place. I hate driving, and I would really hate to be driving late at night after being drained. Maybe I can find someone to sublease from. Thanks for the input.
I am in teachers college right now and I have about 6 students in my cohort who drive an hour and a half or more a day (and most of them have kids). Dont ask me how they do it lol
I ditto what everyone else said. I know 6 weeks seems like a long time, but it will fly by. Another consideration is, what about if there is traffic and/or an accident; your commute could be even longer.
Ms Hedgehog No kidding. Gas is really suposed to rise, this is will be next next summer (2012). Who knows what gas will be like then.
crayfish You are right. Thanks for the advice.
Worst case scenario- there is a hotel that does extended stay. It might be kind of fun for me to have a little freedom and stay in a hotel. DH could come visit on the weekends. Or, best case, I will find a cool place to sub, or a cool roommate.
Thanks all!
It's going to get old quick! Currently, our commute (FI and I work for the same company) is about 50 minutes but thats with standard traffic. Add some rain or, god forbid, a fender bender into the mix and we're looking at closer to an hour and a half with all the god damn rubberneckers on the road. Don't even get me started on the 3 hour commute when there's a snow storm. It sucks. Even 50 minutes is a lot when you realize you have to do it twice a day. Our commute has put a boat load of miles on our car (3 years old and more than 70k miles). If we weren't so comfortable in our jobs, we would look for something closer to home.
s_h_e_l_b_s That sounds a lot like my program. I can't imagine doing that with kids in the mix. I guess it is good to know it is possible.
noritake22 Yeah, and at least it will be in the summer and I can walk around and go shopping, and I have some old friends there. That is true, I hate the stress of driving, and there could always be car trouble too. (= stress!)
CaitMarae LOL "rubberneckers" I like that. No kidding. Good advice. Plus, it rains all the time here. That would be awful at night!
Interesting how many people don't see this as feasible!
I commute an hour each way every day for work. It's shorter than my commute was when I lived in LA!
Honestly, you get used to it.
@daydreamwanderer: Feasible is diiferent from healthy or desirable, She is talking about a commute that is 50% longer than you do. Plus there will be required reading and writing in the evenings after class and after the commmute.
Most universities have some sort of bulletin board where summer school students can contact each other and line up temporary accomodation including a roommate if that is what you are looking for.
I did half that last summer- 45 minutes there and 45min-1hour back.
I would do 45 minutes again however I would not be happy about it, anything over that would be an absolute no. It was insanity, I hate driving so I have no idea why I agreed to do that to myself. Added on top of that every once in awhile there would be accidents that would add lots of time to my drive- one day it took me 3 hours to get home (2 of which were on a 2 mile stretch).
I have a friend with that same commute, and yes she skips class a lot and doesn't have as much time to study as she needs. But she wanted to be able to come home every night to her family and her own house, so she made that choice. You could look into subletting a room, or if you have a friend whose couch you could crash on if you're particularly tired one night. But while it would be a total pain, I do think it's feasible. And your gas prices wouldn't be any more than the cost of subletting, so that's all pretty much the same.
Plus, if you can make good use of your time (catch up on phone calls, listen to books on tape, relax, listen to any study tapes), then it might actually benefit you. It's only 6 weeks, so if you want to I think you could easily do it.
@julies1949: Different personalities, I guess :)
I'd personally rather the commute than living away from my husband for six weeks.
ETA: OP, will you be working during this time as well? Or just doing the class? If so, where's your job located? Would you be choosing between a commute to work or a commute to class?
I used to have an hour and a half commute to school. It was awful, and the summer session was the worst. My biggest problem was in a short semester (like summer), you need to do a lot of studying every day to stay on top of work. Having to spend 3 hours a day driving plus time in class, by the time I got home I was exhausted and trying to study for a few more hours was very very hard.
I would find a place to stay closer to the school.
Wow. We have the same dilemma. One thing in my favor is there is a bus, complete with WiFi, that does the trip. I can't use it all days fall quarter because my class schedule won't mesh, but I am looking into it. But on the days I can use it, at least it gives me the opportunity to work during the commute. I am also considering renting a room for a few days a week. It isn't an perfect situation, but this is one of the best programs in the county for my field. It would be crazy not to pursue it, especially since I have full funding.
It's not an ideal for FI and I to spend our first year of marriage, but his highly stable job and our home makes a move out of the question. I know others on the faculty do the same commute, so it can be done.
daydreamwanderer I might have a part-time job, but most likely just the classes and all of the work that goes along with it. But I am mainly concerned with the classes over having a job, so that is my first priority (or will be at that time). I too cannot imagine not being with my husband at night. I am NOT someone who likes to live alone (I have done it many times), so that is important to me. PS. I used to be wild before I was married, so I secretly... well, I just have to talk to DH about that. He keeps me grounded, in other words, and I don't think I ever want to live apart. So, if it is that important to me (although he is supportive either way), maybe I will just deal with the drive.
ALL, thanks for the ideas. I think I will look into both options and see what feels right when I get up to this. I guess whatever I feel most comfortable with when the time comes I will end up doing. Both options are crap, so I hope this is worthwhile!
MissIntent Good point! I agree that it depends on the exact hours I have to be there, and how much work I have to do outside of class. I did a Spanish summer session once and I was single and had to work (class was 8-12 am! I worked from 1-8pm) and it was INSANE. I had to work on my homework when I got home until midnight then get straight to sleep. It was really rough.
accorn In college I did a 45 minute- and hour commute, and I actually liked it- but I totally ended up skipping class a lot and the gas added up... I am glad I have some time to decide!
Maybe I will get lucky and meet another commuter in my class that lives here! That would help SO MUCH!
Miss OBG That might be nice if I can relax and have some time to listen to books on tape, etc. Once I am out of the city, I think the drive might be nice. I think if I do drive, it will be a little like "Survivor" for me- surviving the 6 weeks...
Scottielass Lucky you and congrats with the funding and the bus. That would be great! I am going to see if I can find one, but most leave from the city and my school is just north of town. You can relax and read etc.
julies1949 It is a small private school but I will definitely explore those options.
Thanks all! I bet it will come down to how I feel at the time about being away from DH. Eeee....
noritake22 You are right by the way, it will totally fly by either way! In a way, I think to get the most of the program, I might want to live near/ at the school.
If you're not working, I really think it would be doable. You can sleep in in the mornings :)
You could also look into recording your classes (if they're heavy on lecture/discussion) and then replaying it on your drive home.
I used to drive 70 miles round trip (about 3 hours) to work before we moved in together. What saved me was books on tape, my iPod (with terrible 80's and 90's music I could sing along to), and having 15 minutes when I got home to go in the bedroom, change, and just breathe!
I drive an hour to work and an hour back each day and I HATE it. Can't wait to move. My fiance and I have the goal of finding a place within 30 minutes of both our jobs when we get married.
It can be done. I've commuted a long ways to work before. Not THAT long, but I've done the hour commute. You should talk to helenberrycrunch--she commutes an hour and a half each way, but she loves her job. She'll know more about it than me.
@daydreamwanderer: I'm with you.
I did this for about a year. While it did get old in the winter, I honestly didn't mind it all that much. I was driving into the city, so I only hit traffic once I got that far. If I had kids to get home to at the end of a work day, I wouldn't do it. But if it was a temporary thing I'd do it no problem! Every other week is no biggie, and a 6 week stretch with good weather would breeze by.
I'd check out the housing options available and compare the costs and the actual time costs as well. FI's house is 80 miles from mine, and after adding gas for 5 trips each week, it was cheaper for me to live on campus and just visit on the weekends.
You may be able to find a sweet summer sublet from some students who want to keep their place but not pay full rent to have to do it, and still be with FI on the weekends. One of my classmates drives the 4 hours home each Friday to be with his wife but lives in a campus apartment since it's relatively cheap.
I love how the conversation has now gone toward supporting the drive. You are all making me feel so much better. It is nice to hear both points of view.
I used to live in the boondocks, and we'd have to drive at least 45 minutes to get anywhere decent, like a restuarant or grocery store or whatever. My husband is driving an hour and a half each way to work everyday right now, and has been for the past month. It means he leaves at 5:30 AM and gets home about 5:00 PM. He hates it and it's eating up our gas, but you gotta do what you gotta do! It's feasible... it might suck a bit, but you could do it if you had to!
I used to do NH to Boston, about 45 minutes to an hour during rush hour. It SUCKED, especially in bad weather (once took me three hours to get home). Gas was high then, so it was costing mea fortuen, plus the miles really added up on the car. Also, I had a lot of shoulder pain, AND I was getting very stressed from all of the insane drivers.
I wouldnt do it.
I wouldn't do it. 3 hours a day in a car? I would go crazy!! definitely rent a room.
@cbee: ultimately, no solution will be ideal, and you'll just need to determine what you really need to be healthy, whether that's 2 nights a week in an inexpensive local hotel or commuting every day or renting a room for 6 weeks. :)
If it was me and I wasn't not working, I'd drive. I like to be home so I can get housework done while I'm doing school work (like laundry, dishes, etc).
You would basically be sitting around a hotel room or rented room all day long. Of course, you'd be studying, but that would get old. Then you'd have to go home on the weekend and catch up on all the stuff you would not be able to do during the week? It sounds preferable to me to drive.
You said you have old friends living in the area, so maybe you could occasionally crash on their couch if you don't feel up to the drive (and have an extra pair of clothes).
Do you have the option to car pool or public transportation? My commute to work is an hour (2 hours total) but I take public transportation so it is not expensive...just time consuming.
My commute to college was 1 hour and I will admit it was tough and expensive. I car pooled with a friend which made it nicer. But...I also worked full time, went to school full time and did that drive. It was tough that is for sure. I did that for 1.5 years and then decided to move to the town my college was in
I did something very similar during my final year of college. I was only going to class 2 times a week during the fall and spring semester since it was only an hour 15 minutes away the commute wasn't as bad. For me to rent the same apartment I was living in, it was costing me $410 a month(just rent and utlities not thinking of expenses). But it was only costing me about $200 for the month for gas commuting since I was able to live at home. But during the summer session since I was going 4 days a week, I was able to pay $500 to rent a room for the entire summer with basic utlilties even though I only needed it for a month. So it just depends on how much it cost to you. And with the rising gas prices, I don't think I would recommend the drive on that factor alone.
My fiance has been commuting 2.5 hours each way via train for the past month, its not fun and he's always exhausted but its doable
I know a few people driving an hour and 20 minutes, a few evenings a week. They are doing it for their master's. In my climate (and weather), I think I would be pretty stressed out and tired after making that kind of commute, unless I could stay with someone if needed.
I would totally do it for only 6 weeks, in the summer.
I know folks who live outsite NYC either in the upper parts of New York or in New Jersey or even Philly and they commute to work. Some of them come from 2hours away. EVERYDAY!! It's expensive and tiring and I don't know how they do it. One of them is ALWAYS SO TIRED and that's just from work. Imagine if you had to do that commute then study etc and then do it the next day. You really won't get time to spend with your husband. You'd spend it commuting and studying and that defeats the whole purpose of going from home.
Becuase I haven't been able to find a new job where we bought our house, I drive to Boston 3 days a week and it's 88 miles each way, door to door, and take on average and hour and forty minutes to go to my current job. Honestly, I'm so use to the drive that only the morning drive bothers me because I have to leave so early to get their in time to get a parking space, otherwise I'd have to pay. The drive home is fine, doesn't bother me really.
If you could get a sublet or do the math and see if it's feasible to get a cheap motel room rather than gas, etc. you may be better off. And, you'll sleep a little bit better and be able to focus on the work. You could even talk to campus housing about your options, if you could stay on campus for the time being.
Good Luck!
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Any long commuters out there?
I am starting a Master's program that is an hour and a half away. During the school year I can work here and only have to drive every other Saturday. However, there is a 6 week summer session I must attend that has classes in the evening (in the summer for 6 weeks, weeknights). Do you think it is possible to drive everyday and back again for 5 days a week? Should I look into getting a temporary place there? (That would be expensive, but my main concern is that I really don't want to be away from DH every night...)
Do you think it is feasible to just drive? I have some time to decide what to do, but what do you think?
Thank you for you input.