Post # 1
Any other bees struggle with Misophonia? A lady that sits near me eats dry cereal for lunch on a regular basis and it drives me insane. Thankfully we are allowed to listen to music with earbuds, otherwise there are days where I’d lose my mind!
For those who don’t know what Misophonia is:
Misophonia, literally “hatred of sound”, is a form of decreased sound tolerance. It is believed[by whom?] to be a neurological disorder characterized by negative experiences resulting only from specific sounds, whether loud or soft. The term was coined by American neuroscientists Pawel Jastreboff and Margaret Jastreboff. The term is often used interchangeably with the term selective sound sensitivity.
Unlike hyperacusis, misophonia is specific for certain sounds. Little is known about the anatomical location of the physiological abnormality that causes such symptoms but it is most likely high central nervous system structures. It has been speculated that the anatomical location may be more central than that involved in hyperacusis.
The emotional reaction to sound characteristic of misophonia is a respondent behavior. A respondent behavior is elicited by a stimulus; an unconditioned response is elicited by an unconditioned stimulus. An example of this is a reflex such as the blink reflex, or pain or fear. With repeated pairings of a neutral stimulus and an unconditioned or conditioned stimulus, the neutral stimulus will elicit a physiological response similar to that elicited by the paired stimulus. When that happens, the neutral stimulus has become a “conditioned stimulus,” and the reflex response is called a “conditioned response.” In the case of misophonia, the respondent behavior elicited by the sound is often limited to or significantly stronger in specific individuals, supporting the premise that reaction to sound by a person with misophonia is a conditioned respondent behavior.
Post # 3
Me! Chewing/crunching and typing drive me absolutely nuts! I have to leave the room if someone else is eating and I’m not (doesn’t bother me as much if I’m eating or chewing). I only recently found out it was actually a ‘thing’ – I thought I was just weird.
Post # 4
This might sound odd, but the sound that’s made when people rub their hands together with soap really bothers me. It’s worse than nails on a chalkboard to me!!!!
Post # 5
I didn’t know it was a thing until Good Morning America did a story on it a couple of years ago. I was SO RELIEVED!! It has helped me to control it but there are still days when I want to cry I get so frustrated with the sounds.
I’ve told my FI about this before and for some reason he just didn’t believe me that it was a real thing. Last night he was on Reddit and goes “Hey – Misophonia – a condition where sounds like chewing ….” I forget exactly what he said, but he was like It’s a real thing and YOU have it! I was like, yeah, I know. I told you this. lol. I think he thought I was just crazy up until last night haha.
Post # 6
Yes! Snapping not only infuriates me, but it also kind of scares me. I have no idea why. All of my friends know haha and I even have one friend who stopped snapping becasue he knows how much it bothers me. Brains are so funky sometimes 🙂
Post # 7
Does your misophonia affect your lives greatly? I am so frustrated with FI’s misophonia. It prevents us from socializing and can cause tension between us when he reacts. Its awful. Do you have advice?
Post # 8
It doesn’t really impact my life in a big way. I’m sorry to hear that your FI’s is so bad. I was reading more about it the other day and there seems to be different levels of severity and it sounds like he’s got it bad. Unfortunately there’s no “cure” for it but maybe he could see a specialist that might help him find ways of coping? I know that once I found out that it was a legit issue and I wasn’t just a crazy b!tch that it helped me to handle it better. Lately it’s been getting worse again but I find that when I have other stress in my life it’s more noticeable.
I use earplugs at night to help me sleep (FI snoring/dog rustling around/licking will keep me awake) and earbuds at work to listen to music to drown out co-workers. One lady I work with eats dry cereal for lunch every.single.day. It is so loud to me and makes me crazy. I feel bad that every day I just glare at her. I have to stop doing that and just plug in my music or go for a walk when she’s eating.
When eating at home if FI and I are eating at the same time I’m fine but if he’s eating and I’m not, I have to go to another room or something.
In my opinion, those of us with Misophonia have to take responsibility for it and learn to cope. We can’t realistically ask others to change their habits because we have this disorder, it’s not their fault. I have asked FI not to eat chips at 10 at night (it gets worse at night for me). But for the most part I just try to handle it on my own. People that don’t have the disorder can’t possibly comprehend how we feel when it kicks in. I literally want to punch people square in the face which seems SO insane but that’s what this disorder does to you. It’s awful.
Post # 9
@jny1179: Thank you for getting back to me 🙂
Yes, FI’s misophonia is really bad. He does the same as you: wears earplugs at night, earbuds for music or podcasts at work when he can.
What sets him off the most is the sound of dogs barking. I’m a dog person, who likes other dog people, so of course all my friends have dogs. Because of this, FI never goes with me to see my friends (who naturally are all couples) so I wind up either being the awkward third wheel (I swear I have a man! You just never see him! I swear he exists!) or just not going at all.
What also gets him is the sound of the TV if it’s not in the same room as he is. If his father is downstairs watching TV and FI can hear it, he gets grumpy. If his dad is snoring, I will BARELY be able to hear it, but FI describes it as a spike going through his head.
I often feel like the bad guy because I just get so uncomfortable with him when he reacts. I love him dearly and will make it work and I’m getting used to his reactions, but they still frusterate me. I’m not sure the point of this post other than to vent, I guess.
Post # 10
Yep, me too! I was so relieved when I read about this, I had no idea that it had a name.
My main annoyances are chewing, flicking nails, biting nails (I can hear a sort of wet, squishy sound and it drives me crazy), and noise from other people’s headphones/phone conversations. This last one is so bad that I’ll sometimes have to block one ear when I’m on public transport otherwise I feel like I won’t be able to stop myself from yelling at the person to keep it down. My FI knows about it, but can’t really do much to change his behaviour so he’s gotten used to me blocking my ears or leaving the room for a bit to calm down.
I’ve also got anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder so maybe it’s related to that.
Post # 11
@jny1179: Oh my god, the glaring! I do that too and my FI is so worried I’m going to get my face punched in one day from glaring at people on public transport.
Post # 12
@Omgbunnies: Lol, I am your FI. At least for TV and dogs, other than that most things don’t bother me though I do tend to prefer quiet. Dogs barking drive me nuts, I don’t even like the sound of the TV most of the time especially when I’m in the same room (luckily DH doesn’t watch TV). I’ve never actually dated anyone who did watch more than occassional TV and the interesting part is it’s not like I found out a guy watched a lot of TV and then didn’t date him, more like I just somehow picked guys who’s personalities made them not like sitting in front of the TV. lol
DH doesn’t seem to care in the least. If we go to my friends who have the TV on all the time and a barking dog, he knows I won’t want to stay very long, and will even say things like “you look like you’re ready to get home” or whatnot. He’s more than welcome to go see his friends who have dogs and can’t live without the TV on all he wantss. It has never seemed like an issue, I’m perfectly happy to stay home and not go where I’m just going to get irritated and edgy. If there’s something important to him or friends/family, I’ll go and just deal with it and make the best of it. I don’t feel like it effects our social life because we both do what makes us happy and comfortable, and don’t feel like the other has to be there though we like it when they are :).
Does your FI feel like it interferes with socializing for him?
Post # 13
@MrsTangerine: does FI rhink it interferes… Well, its hard to say. Sometimes he wishes he could go out with friends and stuff, but hes also always willing to fill that need up with video games. I guess its mostly me who’s bothered. I just hate feeling like the third wheel.
Post # 14
@Omgbunnies: Lol, I’m a big video game fan, more than DH, but I’m also a “happy hermit” as I like to call it.
But if it does bother him I hope he finds a solution. Caring friends, how to deal, etc. I’m not above asking friends to turn down/off the TV or meet somewhere quiet. Either it happens or doesn’t, they are still my friends I just won’t hang out there much, and they are welcome to come over and some do a lot.
And much as I’d like it if dogs didn’t bark, they do bark, as illogical as it usually is, it’s what they do (attention, something like a car outside the yard, etc). So same thing, I’ll avoid the dogs and owners (alone) are welcome at my house. Since I have a cat it makes a great excuse why no dogs here lol.
Post # 15
I just watched the episode of Good Morning America and 20/20 and am SOOOO relieved to see that this is a real disorder!
I’ve been suffering from this since I was about 9 years old. I would get SO angry at the way my Dad smacked his mouth, ate, and even breathed.
This eventually developed into a hatred of all mouth noises (including coughing and clearing of the throat).
I’ve always thought it was anxiety related. My Husband gets really upset when I have panic attacks when he eats chips or swallows his coffee too loudly. But i get so enraged! I saw that Kelly Ripa has it! It made me feel so much better when she was talking about having to leave the room when her Husband eats a peach.
I haven’t been to the movie theatre in four years because i can’t stand to hear people eat popcorn, candy or even open the bag their candy is in.
I just really hope this becomes more well known and there will eventually be a treatment for it!