NWR: "No gifts necessary" on birthday party invite – yay or nay?

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: Should I include "No gifts necessary" on b'day invite?
    Yes - it takes the pressure off & is a nice thing to say : (11 votes)
    42 %
    No - it's presumptuous and should be left off : (11 votes)
    42 %
    Doesn't matter either way.... : (1 votes)
    4 %
    Other : (3 votes)
    12 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    885 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    What about putting “Best wishes only”?  I think that’s what people say when gifts are not expected.

    If people really want to bring something, they will anyways though.

    Post # 4
    Member
    42469 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @oracle:  I dislike any references to gifts on an invitation.

    A friend recently had a birthday party with this wording:

    We are blessed in our lives. Please share our blessings by only bringing a donation for the food bank.

    I realize it still asks the guests to bring something, but it does get the message across that no gifts are wanted for the bithday boy.

    Post # 5
    Member
    3866 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Generally, I’d say leave it off. However, judging by your comment about recent invites, if it’s common in your circle, go for it.

    Post # 6
    Member
    11668 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @oracle:  I guess it would depend on your social group but I don’t think it’s necessary to weite. I dont gift for adult birthdays except I would bring wine or flowers maybe. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1883 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @oracle:  I’d say nothing… if I got such an invite and it were a close friend of mine, I’d show up with a small gift anyway. In my culture it’s absolutely unacceptable to show up at someone’s house or event empty handed.

    Post # 8
    Member
    2063 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    i don’t like it because it makes me think “omgggg was i supposed to bring a gift to all those other birthday parties i attended?!” at this point i don’t think adults should be exchanging birthday gifts unless they’re super close and WANT to. if someone really wants to bring a gift, they will regardless of information on an invitation… i seriously would never think i had to bring a gift for an adult.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1302 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I personally like when it is spelled out for me – it takes the guesswork out of it and I just know whether to bring a gift or not!

    Post # 10
    Member
    5697 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I think that it’s an unneccessary thing to say for an adult’s birthday party.

    If it’s a kid’s bday party where gifts are definitely going to get brought, and the child or parent would prefer no gifts but a donation i think it’s appropriate to say

    I also think it’s fine to say for a party that people typically would bring gifts. Showers, engagement parties (gifts at those are questionable, sometimes yes sometimes no) etc…

    Post # 11
    Member
    1403 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    For some reason having “no gifts necessary” rubs me the wrong way. 

    Obviously no gifts are necessary – when, ever in life, are gifts necessary?  It’s a nice gesture and maybe the “polite” thing to do but they’re never necessary.  It’s just stating the obvious and comes off as reverse psychology for the guests.

    Post # 12
    Member
    6964 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2015

    @oracle:  I would only say “no gifts please” because gifts are never necessary and as an adult I haven’t been to a party in YEARS where everyone brought a gift 

    Post # 13
    Member
    2562 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Most adults I know don’t bring gifts to a birthday party, but I don’t think the note is offensive if you put it with all the other information.

    Although I might not listen to you and bring you a gift anyway, that’s my call, not yours. 🙂

    Post # 14
    Member
    2162 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I would just leave it out entirely.

    Post # 15
    Member
    5432 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014 - Ontario, Canada ♥ EDD- April 2016

    I would just say ‘best wishes only’, because that’s typically what is written when guests shouldn’t bring gifts. ‘No gifts necessary’ is a little odd, because gifts are never necessary.

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