Offend if I buy Home Cleaning?

posted 2 years ago in Home
Post # 2
2394 posts
Buzzing bee

Not sure how to answer because I’m not sure how you would like to go about it.

For example, do you want to surprise her while she’s at work and have her come home to find out that  a maid cleaned the house from top to bottom?

Or are you thinking of having a friendly, supportive chat with her, and offer to give her a maid cleaning service as a gift?

Post # 4
4413 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I would be upset if my sister came in and cleaned my house herself, mostly because I would feel really weird about picturing my own sister on her hands and knees scrubbing the weird gross area behind the toilet and such things. But if my sister hired a maid to clean my house, I would be thrilled!!

I’ve never met anyone on earth who wouldn’t appreciate having someone else clean those gross hard-to-reach spots that a usual weekly cleaning doesn’t get to. I just wouldn’t advise doing it yourself, lest it come off as a weird thing. “I personally removed the poop from your toilets!” = uhhh … you what?

Post # 5
15011 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

You know your sister best. If my sister did that, I would kill her, but that’s because she is an overbearing lazy slob. Now if my brother got me that as a surprise, I’d love it. So it all depends on your family dynamics. I don’t think it should be a surprise though, maybe a gift certificate and a nice card inviting her for a coffee date with you while it’s being cleaned. I think then it comes off as you wanting to do something nice for her rather than she isn’t capable of keeping it up.


I just noticed you want to do it yourself. No. I definitely wouldn’t want that at all. But hiring someone, that’s different.

Post # 6
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Honestly, I would be offended if someone hired a maid for me. Even though your heart is in the right place, I think it might offend. Has she mentioned wanting a maid? Or the house needing a top to bottom deep clean?

I just think that’s a sensitive topic that she might take as you thinking her house isn’t clean enough…

Post # 7
1648 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Can you be my sister? Seriously, cleaning my house (2 kids, 2 dogs who shed A TON, and 2 long-haired cats) is SUCH a chore, if someone decided to pay for maid service for me I would be thrilled. My husband and I have agreed that when we get a bigger house, we’re getting regular maid service because we don’t want to spend all of our time at home together cleaning. 

If you want to feel her out a bit, maybe mention that you’re thinking of going that route yourself just to get a good deep-clean done as a one-time thing. See how she reacts to that. Good luck!

Post # 8
298 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

baletrina:  I think it would be awesome! I am a neat freak and my house is always pretty spotless but I don’t think it can ever be too clean. 🙂 I mean, esp. things like sliding glass door tracks and crown moulding… If you think she would be offended than I wouldn’t, but if you don’t think she would be: give her a card with a gift card or handmade coupon to redeem and tell her that she works so hard and deserves a week or two off from having to clean and your happy to schedule it with a reputable cleaning service for when you are there to make it even more stress-relieving. If it’s clear you aren’t saying her house is not clean enough, then I think it would be nice to do. 

On a side note, it’s a bummer we live in such an easily offended society that one has to worry about offending another over something that should be a real treat!

Post # 9
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - 11/15/14-Vineyard

I would suggest a gift certificate and let her set it up.

That seems like my house except we have 5 kids, we both work and commute and with the dog, cleaning is an endless job. We have hired someone to come in when we are realllly busy but I still don’t feel comforable unless I’m there and they usually take HOURS (usually a minimum of 2.5 hrs). There were some that I called and do not want back again and did not feel comforable around and had to “watch them”. So if you do get a service really be picky about who you choose to clean for them and I would let her choose when they should come. 

I’m not a slob by any means and we all do chores on a daily basis but my sister is always making sarcastic remarks or doing her “white glove test” every time she comes over. I HATE IT when she comes over and judges everything. So if you have that dynamic, if that came from her I would be pissed and throw it away. Anyone else, I might keep it. 

Post # 10
6953 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I would ask first.

Post # 11
2889 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

for a while my brother was living back home with our parents and i lived about 4 hours away. my brother is a pig and when i would come visit, the bathroom would be disgusting, so i would give it a quick cleaning and my brother would get so mad at me. like, dude, the last thing i want to be doing is scrubbing your pee off the toilet, but no one wants to use a disgusting bathroom. even my mom had to be sneaky when she wanted to clean it, it was ridiculous!

if it was my brother’s own apartment/house, i would not have gone in there and started cleaning, but it’s my parents house, so i feel comfortable cleaning it.

my point is that people take offense when others feel the need to clean for them, so i would run the idea past her first.

Post # 12
2302 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

gift certificate for sure. it’s actually a gift that my mother has done for new moms – she gets them a few things for the baby, a few casseroles she’s made and a half day of a maid service. i think it’s been pretty well received! 🙂 

that said, i’d frame it like ‘i’m amazed by how well you take care of your family, and i wanted to ease your load for a week or two!’ rather than ‘holy crap, i can’t take this place anymore’. make it seem like a treat for her rather than a wake up call 🙂

Post # 13
8675 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I don’t know. I don’t think I’d be cool with a bunch of strangers shlepping in my home when I’m not there and cleaning my house. Especially if I had no idea it was going to happen. I’d give her a gift card and let her short it out.

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Post # 14
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

baletrina:  I think I would be excited if I came home to a clean house and could relax for awhile lol 

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