- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
I know my wedding date is 17 months away so there’s TONS of time for planning and what not, but I’m getting the feeling 3/4 of my bridesmaids have no interest.
* Bridesmaid or Best Man 1 is my younger sister and Maid/Matron of Honor. I had some reservations about making her my Maid/Matron of Honor because she’s very forgetful and “last minute” and doesn’t really do well with planning or organizing. But she is my sister and we’ve gotten closer over the last few years so I made her my Maid/Matron of Honor. In addition to the previously mentioned reservations, she’s decided in the last few months that she’s going to NYU in June for her masters, which means she graduates in May 2013, which is 4 short months before my wedding. So, yeah. She’s going to be GONE the entire time we’re planning everything. I’ve tried having several conversations with her about how we’re going to handle this and she just sort of shrugs it off. I mean I know she has other things on her mind but … how am I supposed to tell her all the stuff that’s going to need done?!?!?
* Bridesmaid or Best Man 2 is a friend I’ve had since, like, 6th grade. We’ve gotten a lot closer recently b/c she introduced me to my fiance and she also recently got engaged. Her wedding won’t be until after mine but I feel like she’s being a little … clingy. I enjoy talking wedding stuff with her but if I have the slighest wedding idea/plans and don’t call/text/invite her she gets really mad and offended. (Like when I went on an impromptu dress appt with my mom and sister on a night she was working). She’s also made it clear that she doesn’t really like BMs 3 & 4.
* Bridesmaid or Best Man 3 is another close friend I’ve had since we were about 13. When we talk or hang out, she seems very interested in wedding plans and helping with decor and invites (she’s very creative) but whenever I invite her places or try and arrange meetings, she has some lame excuses about previous plans — usually involving her loser-ass creepy boyfriend.
* Bridesmaid or Best Man 4 has been a good friend for a long time as well. She’s been married for 2.5 years and I’ve felt on a few occasions that she’s looking down on my wedding, relationship, etc. We’ve had a few long talks about it and she swears she doesn’t see things that way and she’s just under a lot of stress with work, money, family right now, so I’m constantly forgiving her. She says she wants to be in my wedding, but again, whenever I mention appts, she kinda blows everything off.
I sent an email to all of them asking us to get together for some preliminary plans before my sister goes away to school. (also made phone calls). Bridesmaid or Best Man 2 was basically like “name the time and place,” but everyone else got all flakey. And my own sister didn’t even respond!
Like I said, I know my wedding’s far away but … am I asking too much for people to at least express some interest? I just feel like none of them have any sense of urgency or planning or timing. Am I being too anxious or paranoid? Or shouldn’t we really take care of this stuff ASAP, especially with my sister’s absence and all of their apparent “so much more important” plans. UCK I sound like a Bridezilla! But is it too much to ask to clear ONE WEEKEND this spring for me? Geez!
(BTW I don’t mean to complain about Bridesmaid or Best Man 2’s enthusiasm. It’s nice to have at least ONE Bridesmaid or Best Man excited and involved ….)