Post # 1
Ok ladies… I have a problem. My “fiancee” and I are already legally married. We eloped back in February, but no one other than his best man knows. We had asked his best mans father to “marry” us since we didn’t actually need someone who is ordained, and he agreed. He was like a father to my FI when he was growing up, so it was nice to include him in some way. Anyway, about a week ago his eyes started to go really bad and now he can’t see anything. He has to have surgery to remove a ton of cataracts from his eyes and he wont be able to see well enough to preform the ceremony. Now, I have no shortage of preachers in my family, but the problem is keeping everyone from finding out that we are already married. And it is not in the budget to be able to pay someone else to do it. I have less than 2 weeks to figure something out and I need suggestions!! We have worked very hard at keeping it a secret because my family is very…well..idk how to put it but they would be pissed if they found out. I managed to keep anyone from finding out we had already eloped even after running into my step-sister at the courthouse the day of. So fellow bees, I am open to suggestions on what you think I should do. I just really don’t want to tell my family the truth this close to the wedding because I don’t want the drama! Wedding day is 9/14
Post # 2
- Wedding: September 2014 - SPRING VALLEY COUNTRY CLUB
Here’s what I’d do. I’d look for someone else. Google is great tool. Also I don’t know if the office of the officiant that canceled offered anything in the way replacements or had any numbers. If all else fails, talk to one the preacher’s in your family who isn’t a blabber mouth and just explain the situation.
Post # 3
One of my friends got married 6 months before her wedding. They didn’t offer the info, but didn’t hold back if someone asked. In order to avoid any weirdness, another of our friends became ordained online. This way, he felt comfortable performing the ceremony, and no one questioned his validity to actually perform it.
Any other close friends that can do that for you? You’d have a “real” officiant, and hopefully it vouldf be someone who won’t blab.
Post # 4
futuremrsdavis1118: I can’t really determine from what’s available online, if you are allowed to officiate your own marriage in Ohio. Can you call your local county office and ask? That way you can perform your own ceremony with no one being any the wiser.
Phone numbers for clerk’s offices
Post # 5
Can you have a close friend officiate for you? Maybe one that has or can quickly get the online certification (or not get it since you don’t need it).
Post # 6
What about getting your best man to also officiate?
Thats what FI and I did from the beginning – our Best man/Officiant will act as officiant during the ceremony (and carry the rings), then at the reception he will have traditional BM duties (speech, etc).
Easy peasy, since you said he already knows you are married. It only takes a second to get ordained online if you want to, then he would have to ability to “officially” legally marry you (in the eyes of your guests).
EDIT: you would want to ask your best man asap if he would be ok with that because speaking in front of crowds is hard for a lot of people. If you do end up doing that, have your ceremony text finalized and send it to him so he can practice, and bring copies of the text to the wedding in a binder so he can read from it.
Post # 7
If this happened to us, I would get a friend/family member ordained and have them do the ceremony. Our officiant is letting us write how we want it to go, so we’d have all of that information already.
One of his uncles always joked that he’d get ordained to do our wedding, but never thought he was serious… but I bet he would if it was needed!
Post # 8
futuremrsdavis1118: Someone mentioned Ohio… are you near Cincinnati? I found our officiant online and he only charged $75.
Post # 9
futuremrsdavis1118: When is the best man’s dad have cataract surgery? You can see the day after, when they take the patch off. He might just need reading glasses. Just a thought. (I had them out when I was 30)
Post # 10
ladybrick: We talked about it and the best man has agreed to do it! He was hesitant at first because he is very shy but he said he’ll do it cause he loves us! Thanks for the suggestion 🙂
Post # 11
kb7: We are in the Columbus area. The wedding will be in Reynoldsburg.
Post # 12
Thanks everyone for all the great ideas!!! Thankfully the best man has agreed to do it. 🙂