Post # 1
I saw the pro-photographer horror stories post and wanted to see if anyone else out there had any officiant horror storries.
When we first got engaged my MIL told us about a friend of hers who would be willing to do it for us for free. I said great, let’s meet him. Well a few months go by and nothing. Finally I ask MIL if she’s talked to him and she said she’ll get in touch with him so we can meet up. I still hear nothing, and finally, a month later, we hear back that he’s already booked that day! At this point I’m minorly freaking out because we’ve done NO searching for an officiant and we’ve got about 6 months till the wedding.
So we start hunting. One woman I called was extremely rude and told me she “doesn’t do rehearsals” because they’re a waste of her time. So obviously she was out. Then one guy told us he’d be our officiant if we were willing to do it, if we would also agree to hire him as our DJ. We already had a DJ and wanted him to do the ceremony, so no again. DH and I met with one woman and we really liked her. We had agreed ahead of time that we wouldn’t be making any decisions right away and would let the person know after we had talked about it together. Well, everything seems great, and then the woman goes “So are you going with me?”. Akaward!! I politely let her know that DH and I had agreed beforehand that we would not be making a decision right then and we would talk about it and give her a call very soon (at this point I wanted to go with her but wanted to talk to DH about it in private). She got VERY nasty at this point and said “I prefer it when people shop around for officiants, that they come to me last”. She also made comments about how she goes the extra mile for the people she works with and she might be booked by the time we decide. We left and decided not to go with her because she was SO RUDE!
When we finally found our minister we were so happy with her and she encouraged us to take some time and talk about if we felt she was the right choice for us or not 🙂
Post # 3
I’ve posted about this before, but I went to a wedding several years ago where the officiant forgot to show up! Nobody could get a hold of him, either. Finally, the officiant for another wedding in the same park an hour later came over to perform the wedding. God bless the other bride and groom; they delayed their own wedding by half an hour so my friend and her fiance could get married.
Post # 4
My sister’s priest did the following:
1 – made a stink about her music – “Air on the G String” was ‘pornographic’
2 – reminded the entire wedding party that if any of us drank liquor before the wedding the marriage wouldn’t ‘stick.’ wtf?
3 – said the word condem instead of condemn during the homily
4 – almost swore during the homily
5 – required the wedding and all guests be out of the church by 2:30 in preparation for confession hour. fine right? except at 2:35 he came running out of the church and down the street, waiving the marriage license which he’d forgotten to have anyone sign….swearing all the while and commenting on how stupid we were for forgetting the marriage license. uh, yeah buddy, that’s your job.
I think she would have been better off if he’d forgotten to show up.
Post # 5
@GreenEyedMoon: Wow…not showing up…that’s a little ridiculous!
@artichokey: That sounds horrible!
Post # 6
Our photographer joked that we got married by Magistrate Mumble (she sounded bored and was barely audible the whole time), but it wasn’t bad–we barely noticed at the time and had a good laugh about it later!
Post # 7
Ours refused to allow music during the ceremony, even my walk down the aisle. I had no clue why the music wasn’t on, DH had hired this dolt. Our friend had the ipod set up, DH bought a sound system just for this & we had our playlist ready to go.
Apparently, this plank flat out refused to permit music! I wish someone had clued me in, I would have sent him on his way, made a party of it & gone to the courthouse with DH on Monday.
The minister kept shooting death rays at our friend, just in case he had the crazy notion of starting up some music.
Can you believe this, he calls himself “Weddings Your Way.”
Uh, not so much.
Post # 8
an officiant that doubles as a DJ??? that earned a what the heck out of me
Post # 9
This isn’t much of a horror story but the officiant at a friend’s wedding this past summer was simply way too thorough and too talkative. The rehearsal, which should have taken no more than 15 – 20 minutes, took an hour. The ceremony also took at least an hour. Just because the guy didn’t seem able to shut up.
My friend knew my then-boyfriend and I would likely get engaged soon and her advice was “don’t hire our officiant!”
Post # 10
@eloping: Yeah not really sure what that was about, and even if we hadn’t had a DJ booked then, I wouldn’t have wanted to find out much more about that.
@sassy411: Weddings your way huh? I hate when officants try to make it about THEIR rules. Hello, I’m hiring you to do a service. Who are you to say what I can and can’t do?
Post # 11
My cousin had an officiant who couldn’t (or wouldn’t) say their names correctly. They dont have difficult names at all. Then she would forget what part she was on. The final straw was that their coordinator contacted them 6 months later and let them know that she was not a real officiant. They ended up having to be married again because it was not legal!!!!
Post # 12
@15happyyears: Wow…that’s awful! Not a real officiant? How does one pass oneself off as one when they’re not? Terrible!
Post # 13
Oh my gosh! I hired one that “doubles as a DJ!” Get this, I send him an email and inquire about hiring him. He writes back weeks later and says, “Haven’t heard back from you.” We were like WTF? So then, he says he is in Vegas right before the wedding and we won’t be able to reach him. I get to the Chapel and there is someone else in his place. He sent his father to do the ceremony. !!!! It actually worked out because the father was a really nice guy, but it was really an awful thing to do.
Post # 14
I thought of another one- it was after we canceled our big wedding and were planning an elopement/ intimate wedding, and we met this officiant at a public place. I said my parents were not going to be there and he made me cry. He pushed. It was really horrible for me. I hate almost nothing more than crying in a public place, but it was all so raw and extremely stressfull and recent at that point. Then he would not let me keep the pamphlet of information unless I signed the contract. He was like a pushy car salesmen. Worst thing of all- he was staring at my breasts! They are large but I always keep them covered (always!) so it was completely uncalled for and out of line. I was tramatized!