Post # 1
backround info- i am only 20 and i have a older brother who is 27. since there is such an age gap we dont really have much have a relationship. & we live 3 hours apart..
we just sent out our invites a couple days ago…
my brother texted my mom saying he got the invite & wont be attending. REALLY ?! you have no heart.
Post # 3
Yikes. Take a deep breath and grab yourself a glass of wine.
Now look at your post- You stated that you don’t have a relationship with your brother and he lives 3 hours away. It would hurt my feelings if my sibling didn’t want to attend my wedding, but look at it logically. Maybe it’s just that he doesn’t feel he can afford the trip.
I’m sorry he doesn’t want to come, maybe you could ask your mother why?
Post # 4
Sounds like you’re better off if he’s going to act that way!! Is he always this immature? He could at least have had the decency to contact you appropriately. Sorry to hear he acted like that.
Post # 5
Relationship or no relationship- he should have the common courtesy to:
– communicate with you directly
– attend your wedding
If you meant 3 hrs driving time, he can get his *** in the car and get to the wedding.I ‘m sure he could stay with family so his expenses would be minimal.
Post # 6
I would be hurt too.
Just because OP said they aren’t close doesn’t mean there is bad blood between them either. to TEXT his mom and say he’s not going is very immature in my opinion. Almost seems like he wants to cause drama. But then, i’m just making wild assumptions. But in my experience, people text “bad news” to stir the pot but then not have to deal with a reaction.
Post # 7
@julies1949: “Relationship or no relationship- he should have the common courtesy to communicate with you directly” I agree 100% with this. He should have let the OP know, not communicate through her mom.
If he doesn’t want to come though, it sucks…however no one is required to attend my wedding if they don’t want to.
I guess I would just look at it like this: You reached out to your estranged brother and he’s not ready for a relationship. It would have been nice, and I would probably have felt hurt too, but this seems to go deeper than just declining a wedding invite.
P.S. LOL I just realized I told a 20 year old to grab a glass of wine in my first post. I’m sorry! For some reason the age you posted just didn’t register in my brain. Duh!
Post # 8
I’m not close to my brother at all and I will not be inviting him to my wedding.
God forgive me but he is a drug head, split from his girlfriend who wants nothing to do with him (she’s a bowl of drama herself and a drug head) they have 3 kids together that I’ve never really felt the need to know (because of their drama). He is now living with my cousin’s ex (who aren’t even legally divorced yet and she has 3 kids as well.. needless to say they arent invited either to my wedding lol).
However, if my brother wasn’t such a loser and had a better life for himself I could understand seeing inviting him to my wedding. And if that were the case and he replied to my mom (which my mom is not his mom, we share the same dad) by a text I would be alittle upset but I don’t think I would be terribly distraught over it.
I don’t know your story with your brother but from my personal experience with mine, I wouldn’t worry much about people who you at least cared enough about to invited and don’t show up. They’re lost!
Post # 9
@LindsayMaree: hahah, its okay. my FI is 24 so he can supply 😉
@PoeticDoveInLA: sorry about your brother !
my brother is very immature ! my parents live about 15 minutes away from me, i live with my FI and he think that my parents still give me money and what not. my FI makes great money. and my parents never give me a dime. i was working 2 jobs and going to school full time. however they helped me pay for schooling, i pay half and they paid the other. he chose not to go to school, thats not my problem. they are paying for the wedding, but thats what they decided and thats kinda how its supposed to be ( sorry if that sounds rude or spoiled.) he is a big ball of drama and drinking. its probably for the better that he doesnt come so he doesnt make an ass out of me, himself or my family. but there is a time and a place to get outta hand and my wedding is not that place. just kind of hurt by it. my FI works for the railroad and worked 50 hours straight without sleep and still attended his sisters wedding. then for him not to text me or call, but call my mom. realy mature !