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Ok to wear wedding set before wedding?

posted 4 years ago in Rings
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    1.
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    Newbee
    tifftheneutron    2/29/2008   Oklahoma

    A little backstory first - when my fiance proposed, he didn't have a lot of money to buy a nice engagement ring. Instead, he gave me a promise ring, the promise being "I promise I'm saving for an engagement ring." He wanted to propose as soon as he decided to marry me (awww!) but he didn't want me to have nothing to show for it.

    So fast forward a few months to us moving into our first house and all the bills that go with it (a $400 gas bill!?), plus help my parents pay for the wedding, changing jobs, etc. *I* told him, don't you dare spend any money on an engagement ring! We can't afford it!

    In steps my grandmother with a gorgeous, gorgeous wedding set, with the matching band for my fiance. It was hers from my grandfather (he's passed away, she's remarried). It's a diamond with smaller diamonds surrounding the engagement ring, and then a half eternity wedding band. It's over 60 years old, so the metal is brittle. The jewelers can't separate them because they'll split, so we're leaving them together.

    I want to wear them NOW. I love them, he loves them, we're so happy to have them. But should I continue wearing my promise ring until the wedding day since my (new to me) engagement ring comes with the wedding band already attached? Would you wear them before your wedding date?

    (and by the way - they were cleaned and now they are SO SHINY. I can't quit staring at how gorgeous this set is)

     
    2.
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    Worker bee
    c-girl      

    If it were me, which it isn't, I'd wait until the wedding. It will make the wedding day more special when you finally get to wear this amazing and meaningful ring set.

     
    3.
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    Worker bee
    e    3/29/08   NYC

    i would wait too..

    but i just placed the order for my beautiful wedding band yesterday and i can't stop thinking about it~!!  if i had it now, i would want to be wearing it too..lol.  so i understand how you feel :)   

     
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    Bumble bee
    Angel    July 15, 2005   Snohomish County, Washington State

    Don't you love it when family steps in? We couldn't afford an engagement ring either...at least not the one I wanted (yeah, at the time I bought into the whole "must be this way, must be that way" mentality), but then his grandpa offered us his late wife's wedding set. Not only was it gorgeous, but it was so special, and it cleaned up beautifully. You can't get a better family blessing that that. :)

    With your situation, I would say wait. You have the promise ring, and I know you really really really want to wear your family ring, but I'm a little concerned about the condition. You mentioned brittle...I had to have mine restored so the stones wouldn't fall out and the metal wouldn't wear down any further. Get it checked out...and get it insured (I'm going through the process right now), so when you do wear it, you'll be worry free.

     
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    Sugar bee
    suzanno    7/12/08   Richland, WA

    I agree with Angel - you should think about using this time to have the prongs rebuilt.  They can also beef up the ring itself, although in some cases - older rings which have worn very thin on the back side - they may need to cut through the setting and weld on a new back portion.  It is so nice of your grandmother to provide her first wedding set - it would heartbreaking to break a prong and lose a stone.

     
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    Helper bee
    babagrlshell    04/05/08   St Augustine, FL

    Personally, I would wait...

    In the meantime, I agree with PP. Make sure to have a good jeweler inspect it- check the prongs, the heads/setting of every single diamond it costs TONS of money to replace even a little single 1/15 ct stone if lost.  

     
    7.
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    Helper bee
    katiethelady    8/2/08   San Francisco

    I say wait -- and how nice to get to wear a part of your grandparents history.

     
    8.
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    Sugar bee
    suzanno    7/12/08   Richland, WA

    Well, you know, slip it on late at night, wear it in the bathtub or something.  I know you're not going to just put it away!  Unless you have the jeweler keep it for you until you're ready for it.  How long until your wedding?

     
    9.
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    Sugar bee
    suzanno    7/12/08   Richland, WA

    Oh, you only have month to wait!  Get the prongs rebuilt and suck it up, you hardly have any time at all left!

     

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