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don't do it!!! although it seems nice, she needs the stuff she registered for, even if it seems unpersonal. Buy up all of her bathroom stuff and put it in a basket for her or something.
Could you perhaps buy her one thing she is registered for, and then a book to go with it? Not sticking to the registry is risky when it's someone you don't know as well. I think that would be a good compromise, though. :)
@judithsr: I'm an off registry kind of person. Building a child's book collection is a great idea. I also knit baby blankets, so I'm perpetually off registry for baby stuff. Another thought is pick an item and see if it pops up on a flash sale site which will be tons cheaper. I've collected a lot of baby gifts that way.
I love the idea of books, but it's true that your friend is going to need the things on her registry - even the impersonal ones. I like to buy my friends something practical from the registry and something personal off registry. You should include a book with a registry gift.
See, this is why I come here. Good advice. :-)
Okay. I guess since we're not necessarily friends, something impersonal and requested isn't a bad thing.
As someone who is having a baby shower thrown for her THIS weekend, I would say that books are the exception. I would be very happy to receive extra books (you can never have too many in my opinion!). However, other baby items and clothing may not be needed and should be avoided unless registered for. Just my opinion!
Could you buy a gift certificate to the place they were registered at? They probably won't get everything on their list and will have to buy some essentials out of pocket and a gift certificate would help.
Books are a good idea, we didn't register for any, but got about 4 of them and can't wait to read them to our son...once he gets a little older.
I actually think it would be a great idea to gift her some books.
I just had my baby shower... and I would have prefered if more people went with the registry. It may seem boring, but we need that stuff, that's why we registered for it!
Ive been stalking my registry for weeks lol...and Im still missing sooo much stuff. I know that the registry can sometimes be impersonal, but its still stuff that we need.
So i think that a book and something from the registry is a good idea :)
Oh yes yes, get books! thats so sweet. Sure she needs stuff on her registry but I agree sometimes its just plain awkward to buy the things that are in your price range. Do you really know her well enough to buy Nipple shields....Awkward. I know a lot of ppl are strict "STICK WITH MY REGISTRY" but thats selfish. A gift is given from the heart, and if you find something that you think is so sweet and lovely than by all means give that. Showers are for people to share the love and joy of an event, wedding/baby, not as gift grubbing event. Please buy what you are comfortable giving.
and i'm having my shower this weekend, and while it would be nice to receive items off the registry I am just so happy so many of my friends are carving out time to come celebrate with me. I still feel a registry is a guide and who knows someone may come up with an item that is AWESOME that I never knew about or thought about. :) great chance to listen and learn from other ppls experiences.
I had a shower for one of my close friends a few months ago, and she told me she actually loved her off registry stuff because it was stuff she hadn't thought of, and was tried and true from the other moms in attendance. I think books are a great gift for anyone, I would give some of your own childhood favourites growing up :)
FI's cousin is pregnant, and I just had my bridal shower, so I fully realize how nice it is to get things from the registry.
I bought 90% of my budget on the registry and then spent the last 10% on two little baby clothes because i LOVE baby clothes! =)
I vote go registry all the way, because it's a sure fire hit that she will love it!
Sounds like maybe you already made your decision, but I just wanted to throw in my voice with those who are saying to just buy her something off her registry. If she registered for it, it's what she really wants and will use the most. There's no question that she'll be happy to receive her registry items, whereas the books may end up in a closet (don't get me wrong, I love books, too, but maybe she's inheriting a big collection...or maybe she's a library girl).
@beesknees: I don't think it's selfish to want things that you need. Of course I appreciate everything my friends and family bought me. But even with 65 people attending my shower, I have about $600 worth of stuff that I need (a large chunk of that is cloth diapers). We just bought a house, we're having a baby, I'm stressed out when it comes to money! I agree that off registry things can be more personal and sweet, but I'm at the point where I need to be practical.
For weddings, I'll give cash or buy off the registry. For babies, I don't. I rarely get to buy cute baby gifts, and if I can't afford what they've registered for, I assume it's things that their close relatives or parents are purchasing for them. Books are always going to be appreciated :)
Like others have said a basket with the affordable but maybe boring items may be exactly what she needs. I have a shower coming up in a month or so and i am really hoping that i get those diapers and necessities, we need them and it would be so helpful to have. Although i do love books.
As a soon to be 1st time mom, I hope I get the things on my registry, BUT books are certainly welcome! I've bought a lot ofr my baby so far, so if someone went off the registry and got books (as opposed to clothes) I'd be happy. :)
As a soon to be 1st time mom, I hope I get the things on my registry, BUT books are certainly welcome! I've bought a lot ofr my baby so far, so if someone went off the registry and got books (as opposed to clothes) I'd be happy. :)
As a soon to be 1st time mom, I hope I get the things on my registry, BUT books are certainly welcome! I've bought a lot ofr my baby so far, so if someone went off the registry and got books (as opposed to clothes) I'd be happy. :)
Every mom-to-be I've talked to said they would much rather get the $20 'not-very-exciting' gift (like the bath soap) then some random outfit that wasn't their style.
While I completely applaud the book idea - save it for future b'days for the child and stick with the registry on this. The mom-to-be is sure to appreciate the gift (even though it may not seem very exciting to me).
I would go with the books. No one in my area registers for baby showers so my gifts are always just what I want to give. But I think the books are a nice idea and would be appreciated.
Things I ALWAYS get for a baby shower are:
Aveeno Baby lotion b/c it's the BEST
other bathroom stuff like
Desitin
infant tylenol
bath rags
and maybe some other small things like that.. not necessarily "wanted" but DEFINITELY needed....
OH.. you cannot and I mean cannot have enough burp rags! lol
She should have stuff like ^this on the registry b/c she's gonna need it. lol
I then find a keepsake box I like.. (target usually has cute ones) and put it all in there.
I LOVED getting boxes I could keep so to me that's a gift in itself lol
I'm another new mom that would have LOVED to get more books for our son. I'm a huge reader and it started early with my parents reading to us every single night. It can get costly to build a library for a child, so IMO books are always a good idea. If you go woth classics though, get a gift receipt, since they might get duplicates.
I would stick to the registry. As first time parents, we registered for things that we really need. I'd much rather get bath stuff or something small from my registry than something I didn't register for. Things that don't seem exciting or personal to you won't appear that way to the mommy-to-be because that's what she registered for.
i love books & i love the idea of having everyone bring one to the shower, but I'd really rather have the things that we really need and make sure we're as prepared as possible for this baby. i've never met anyone who was disappointed to get a pack of diapers as a gift. You could always get diapers! Or a gift card!
Stick to the registry, even if it seems impersonal. They put those things there for a reason, so even if it seems impersonal, they will probably be excited to get it. That was a lesson learned from my wedding at least. And with baby coming, the need for practical gifts-- small as they may be-- is all the more important.
That said, if you wanted to go more personal, I'd get a practical thing or 2 on the registry, then supplement with books or something more personal to go with it. OR, here are a couple of other ideas:
1. Pampering for MOM: a new robe to wear at the hospital, and/or a gift card for a massage and/or a manicure. Mom is going to be putting in a lot of work to bring baby into the world, and she deserves it! (People seem to forget mom and focus on baby instead after baby arrives, so doing something for mom seems extra special.)
2. Frozen dinners-- Offer to stock her freezer with a 5 or so casseroles. One less thing to worry about with a new baby. (I'd probably only do this if I knew the family and their likes/dislikes well.)
3. Housecleaning-- won't cost you a penny, but I can't think of something I'm looking forward to LEAST post baby. If someone offered to do that, I'd do cartwheels-- and yes, I'd do them while pregnant. I'd probably ask for the giver to be sainted too. (Again, probably only a good gift if you know the family well. If not and you have the budget, I'd hire a housecleaning service to come by a time or 2 post baby instead.)
4. Restaurant gift card along with a babysitting coupon. Let the new mom and dad have a date night. They're going to need it during this stressful time.
---- but I'd still stick to the registry if possible.
I normally try to stick to the registry for most showers I attend but I'm co-hosting my FSIL's baby shower in a few weeks and my gifts were not on the registry. I made her a diaper cake (not like you can register for one of those anyway) and I'm having one of my bridesmaids make her a custom feeding cover.
She already had her shower for her side of the family and they bought all of the good stuff so we're left with rash cream and onesies (there's obviously more on there but everything is pretty boring). Sorry, I know the baby will need said rash cream but I'm not buying it.
If the off the registry items are thoughtful and useful then I see no problem with straying from the registry.
Please stick with the registry. Even the small things most mommies have done a lot of research on and the brands that they pick (down to bath products) are the ones that they prefer.
Please stick to the registry, I explained more why here: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/baby-registry I know something like diapers might seem impersonal and the mom-to-be isn't going to oooh and ahhh over diapers like she might a cute outfit she registered for, BUT she sure will be grateful!
We had to go to a total of FIVE, yes FIVE stores to return things to so we had to run all around town. It was a super hot day and it was very frustrating since people also don't include gift receipts. Also, we thought certain things were bought from one store and when we found out they weren't we actually had to go back to stores we had already been to so we could return things. It was such a pain.
If you wanted to get a children's book in addition to something from the registry that's not a bad thing, I too am a book lover. But, you might be assuming they don't already have the book, ya know? That's why I say be safe and help the tired pregnant lady and stick to her list. :)
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I'm going to a baby shower next weekend for my friend's sister--so someone whose more of an aquaintence than a friend.
A lot of the items on their registry are a bit out of my price range, and the ones that aren't feel like totally impersonal things to get.
I really like the idea of getting books as gifts, because reading is awesome, and I just like sending that message. So, I was thinking of getting a few books rather than getting one of the affordable items on the registry.
So, is this okay? I know babies don't respond to books for at least a few months, but it seems like not a bad option for when they are ready to. Maybe?