(Closed) Okay, we received an offer…(advice?!)

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
139 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Definitely strange, but if you feel like you wouldn’t be compromising your dream wedding by eloping, go for it.  Hawaii would be GORGEOUS and very tempting, but don’t allow all the outside circumstances to make your decision for you.  Go with what your heart tells you.

Post # 4
Member
8354 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

From what you have posted, it seems like you really want to take the offer.

I would talk to your mom and see how she would feel if you did this, then make your decision.

Post # 5
Member
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Ultimately you will have to decide what is the most important to you. This is such a difficult decision to make. Where you someone who grew up dreaming of your wedding day? When you invision your wedding day, do you think of just you and your hubby to be or do you see your entire family and friends there? If you provide enough time, then the people that you love and want to be there could start saving if you chose Hawaii, or wherever. You could always go to Hawaii and then have a small party when you get home. Such a difficult decision! I wish you the best of luck!

Post # 6
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

How Godfather-ish *scratching head*.  I tell you, that would be a pretty damn tempting offer.  My brother is getting about 6 weeks before me.  What I could do with that kind of money saved….Unfortunately, I think we are past the point of no return.

Post # 9
Member
5892 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

i bet it was your FFIL, but he didn’t want to admit it or pressure you.  that’s my guess!

Post # 10
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@laktolkr:  Just pray you won’t find a horse head in your bed if you say “no”. Wink

Post # 11
Member
37 posts
Newbee

Going away and having a wedding doesn’t mean your father still couldn’t be present.  if you family had planned on financially assisting, perhaps they would use that money to fly to Hawaii for a few days to be present.  You could invite the parents to come along to be present and a few other family friends and go for it. 

 

 

Post # 13
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I would totally take it.  If your paren’t were going to help with the planning anyways, there’s no reason they couldn’t be there.  Honestly, if we were given that option, we would do it…plus, you’re already somewhere you could honeymoon! less stress having to plan that on top of everything ๐Ÿ™‚ If planning the wedding so close to your sisters is hard on you (and/or family) it may be best/less anxiety ๐Ÿ™‚ best of luck in whatever you choose!

Post # 14
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I wouldn’t.. But that’s me. I’ve dreamt of my wedding since birth! I think I would regret not having a nice wedding surrounded by the people I love. It’s your one day to really celebrate.. although you could have a big vow renewal… I’ve seen that done too.

Post # 15
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Play the 10-10-10 game. How will you feel about it in 10 hours? 10 months? 10 years? 

Personally, the only things that are important and non-negotiable about my wedding is that it is performed at my home church with the people I love around me, so I would never forgive myself if I had a destination wedding. 

But, if money is tight, you really don’t want to deal with your parents, and how you get married isn’t important, then take FFIL up on it. 

Just don’t give up what you want for your day because of what other people want.

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