- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
There’s only one thing really that would make me consider breaking up with FI. He snores.
Normally, I’d be ok with that. I generally get to sleep faster than he does, and it won’t bother me if I’m already out when he starts. But if I wake up in the middle of the night and he snores, there’s no way in hell I can get back to sleep. It’s loud! I try to wiggle, move the bed slightly, nudge him… nothing. The only way I can get him to stop is if I actually wake him up. He’s been an insomniac most of his life, so that really pisses him off. He has an extremely hard time getting back to sleep. Seeing as how he’s really the main breadwinner (and I’m currently unemployed for the season), I generally let him sleep. I just get up and move to the guest bed or the couch.
But lately, it’s been getting worse. The past few months, I’ve had to leave the bed up to 50% of nights. If I actually do have some reason I need to be well rested and wake up early, I don’t even go to bed. I just start out camping in the guest bed or the couch.
There’s a few reasons this pisses me off. One, I am obviously not getting the sleep I should. That will make anyone grumpy! And two, the past couple of years have seen me get a few injuries that really do require a nice mattress to sleep on. There’s a good chance I wake up with some bad pain if I’m not in our bed (we paid extra for that nice pillow top!). Limping all morning makes me grumpy, too.
Here’s the kicker, though. He claims I’m lying about the whole thing. I have recorded him with my dang iPhone (if I can hide the screen’s light), with a timestamp and everything. He brushes it off. He claims he was awake the whole time, even though I never get any response to, “Wow, you’re snoring really loud, are you actually asleep over there??” Occasionally I accidently wake him while leaving the room, and then he claims he was awake the whole time because he heard me leave. He can’t figure out a good answer when I ask him why on earth I would have an advantage to lying about something like that.
He won’t try nose strips, or sprays, or mouth guards, or anything. That is the only part of the relationship he will not give a crap about attempting to work on. His snoring. I’ve tried earplugs, which is the only thing I can think of doing. They do work, but still not well enough for me to get back to sleep if I wake up while he’s snoring.
Any suggestions, Bees?? This is really the only major thing between us that drives me absolutely nuts! How can I live with an FI that I can’t even sleep in the same room with?