- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2013
Hi all I’m sorry this is long but I kinda need to download but desperately need advise….
So Im having a horrendous time with my dress.. To start with I brought a dress that I fell in love with online about a week after we announced our engagement and it just wasn’t what I expected once it arrived, which my mum expected being from china and so cheap, but no biggie, I got over it and started sourcing new ideas…
So my mother and I went to the only 3 dress shops in our state, 1 only had 2 dresses in my size and nothing like what I was looking for and they refused to order anything so yep that was a no go. The next shop had some nice dresses but refused to tell us who the designers were or prices Until we had picked one and were ready to have it ordered, umm yeah never heard that before…the 3rd shop was great, nice dresses, customer service etc, I tried a few dresses on got an idea of the style I’m after,then asked prices… They want $5000 for a Pronovias dress that I can buy anywhere else in Australia for less than $2000!!! WTF??
So my mum and I decided it was going to be best to fly down south to purchase a dress and here’s where it all kicked off… My jealous sister inlaw took it apon herself to take my future inlaws through my Facebook page and show them what we are prepared to spend on a dress and that we had to go out of state to find one and they lost it! I have been informed by my Future Mother-In-Law that I should hire a dress since she wore a borrowed dress when she got married (cuz they were broke and her husband made her, not by her choice at all!). Now I’m really not interested in that (no offence to those that are or did) not to mention noone in our state hires dressess so i would have to fly down to hire, have fittings and to return the dress (ends up being no diff cost to buying one) and when I tried to explain this a humongous fight ensued screaming, swearing the whole lot! And this is not normal for our family and after being together 13 years I never expected to be spoken to the way I was by Future Mother-In-Law. To add to it all she tried to give me some earrings that she had gone shopping with the whole family minus myself (she excludes me from everything)to purchase for me to wear on the day, now I don’t have a dress so how can any jewellery be picked?? not to mention it was made clear to her that my mother wanted to do that for me as I am her only child and this WILL be my only wedding ever! Dress and Jewellery that’s all she’s asked to do..
So now I have an angry Future Mother-In-Law and then comes in my mum kicking and screaming about how “this woman is trying to take away the only 2 things that she is meant to do as the mother of the bride” which is totally understandable. I left home at 15 and was straight into a relationship with FH and she didn’t have all those special moments with me like most mother daughters do… BUT…she’s not helping! Far out I get that my mums upset and I get that my mother inlaw is upset to but for F’s sake have they all forgotten that this is my wedding??
Sooooooo… To compromise (shut Future Mother-In-Law up) I told my mum that I am just going to have the dress that I ordered altered and ill DIY some bling and beading on it since its so plain. And she lost it again having a complete breakdown saying that I’m letting Future Mother-In-Law “win” and that I’m taking away the most special moment in her life by not picking a gown together (she hates the one I ordered) blah blah blah….
WHAT DO I DO??? Do I make a lifetime of drama (inlaws don’t ever let anything go) and go buy a dress with my mum? Or Do I wear a dress I don’t like to save a lifetime of drama with the inlaws but hurt my mum?
Please help me, I’m at the point where I’m physically sick from stress and I’m so emotional and just want to cancel the whole thing.. Please please please help!!! 🙁